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Okay.

So some of you figured it out. Some of you I tortured with it first.

Yes, I am John.
Yes, I am a woman now.
Yes, I am also wearing a crown. (No I can't take it off, and yes it's what caused this.)

No it is not permanent. I sure the fuck hope it isn't.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talks

You may now ask your questions.