Original poster: house_illrepute
Title: “How to Make Yourself Miserable and Ensure That Harry Potter Will Never Shag You Again (Ever!!!). The Easy Way!” By Draco Malfoy
Author: Brandon, from the House of Ill Repute
Characters: Harry, Draco and the usual assortment of ne’er-do-wells, miscreants, and ruffians.
Warnings: Uhm… is ‘not beta-ed’ a warning? Well, it is now. Please direct any mistakes to me. Other than that, some might consider this angst. I don’t, but there’s definitely plenty of enmity, antipathy, and hostility. Mentions of schmexing, but otherwise smut-free.
Canon Timeline: HBP-Compliant; occurs during their Seventh Year.
Summary: This is what happens when you start shagging the one person you hate the most.
Author’s Notes: Written for 2 of slynthindor100’s weekly challenge prompts:
Challenge #37 ( “
Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later” from Austin Powers ) and
Challenge #36 (
‘guilty pleasure’ ).
Word Count: 1481
Complete: Yes (one-shot)
Draco Malfoy lay sprawled out on the floor after a right-hook caught him quite by surprise. More to the point, since taunts came quick and easy for him when Potter was the subject matter, he could scarcely recall what he had said to the Boy Saviour that triggered such a brazen – though not altogether uncharacteristic – attack. Legs splayed and back against the wall, Draco touched his chin with the back of his hand. His normally perfect-worn robes puddled around him as he sat, half-amused, half-annoyed at the affront (but more annoyed that Harry Potter had one-upped him in front of a good portion of the Hogwarts student body).
And speaking of ‘Potter’, the ruddy git stood over Draco, fists clenched and teeth gnashed. Hermione Granger tried to restrain him, her face twisted into some grotesque phizog of concern and spouting on about how many school codes Harry was violating and ‘oh-no-what-will-Headmaster-McGonagall-say-if-she-found-out’.
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