Sam listened to her and man, if he could count the times Dean had called him a junkie. Drinking demon blood left a lot to be desired, but when he did, he felt in control. He felt strong. Either way, that was over now and now Sam was just dealing with the fact that he was seeing a demon - or an angel, depending on how someone looked at it. The only escape he had was to press on the wound that was on his hand, it brought him back to reality but there was only so much longer he could do that before Sam just lost it. Sitting here, with Alicia, he felt calm. He felt okay.
He didn't bring up the fact that he was hooked on ... basically a drug. It was Sam's drug. Either way, he steered clear of that because it didn't matter now and he didn't want Alicia to feel uncomfortable. Then again, if he did mention it, maybe it could give her some hope that it does get better. He opted to not say anything.
"I know, I totally understand," he sighed and looked ahead. "It's like I've been in my brother's shadow - my father's. I don't know, I thought I was doing fine and then family just sucks you back in." He looked at Alicia, "But I think it would have hurt worse if they didn't. You know, want me. I don't know." He licked his lips and looked away.
"I know my brother's okay. He'll figure this out. He'll find me. He always does." Sam knew that for sure. Dean was a lot of things, but he wasn't one to give up. Not entirely. Sam was pretty sure that Dean was working this as a case as he spoke. Sam just felt like he should have been doing something more - which was why he was out, looking around, attempting to get books so he could read up. He planned on going to the library and doing a little research on this town and what could possibly be going on.
"Need a distraction?" He asked. He gave her a soft smile. "I was thinking of heading to the library and reading some newspapers on the town, trying to get a better feel beyond the stereotypes. You're welcome to go with me."