Maybe it was a childish view, but if she was childish for feeling that way, then so was Derek, because he felt the same way. ...which was why, even if she never wanted to see him again after this, he owed her an apology, at least, for doing exactly the one thing he never wanted to do to Patty Spivot. "I know..." was all he could come up with, because he did know it and he owed her honesty now more than ever.
Seeing her cry was the second worst feeling in the world, but seeing Patty cry because of him, because of something he'd done to hurt her, was the actual worst thing in the world.
He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. The fact of the matter was that there was no way for her to know any of those things. There was no way for him to prove any of them.
"You don't," he admitted. "You don't know you can trust me. You don't know I won't do it again. ...but I think you know that I mean it, because I think you knew how I felt about you before I did and I think the fact that I couldn't say it when we both knew damned well it was true is a big reason that it hurt you so much. All I ever wanted was someone exactly like you. My whole life, that it's, that's all I ever wanted and then I finally met you and I got to know you and I fell in love with you and that was all...cripplingly terrifying and I'm so sorry I fucked it up. I can't take it back. And I'd get it if you couldn't forgive that or if you just couldn't...find a reason to trust me now, I would. I really would. But I owed you honesty and now you have it, all of it. I owed you that much, Patty, you deserved that much."