InsaneJournal

Who: Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy
What: Lots of long-overdue conversations
Where: Malfoy Manor
When: Saturday, April 4, 1998
Rating: Low
Status: Log. Complete.


Narcissa awoke from her light doze at Lucius's touch and smiled up at him. She'd fallen asleep on the couch again, which was horribly vexing, but at least this time she'd woken before Lucius carried her back to their rooms. Every other time she'd been up since Marcelia's visit, she'd fallen asleep on a couch and woken some time later tucked carefully into bed. "You were about to carry me back to bed, weren't you?" He hadn't said anything when she'd been up this past week, but she knew he'd much rather she stayed tucked safely in bed until she was fully healed.

Lucius started a little guiltily when she woke, though there was no reason he should. He’d resigned himself reluctantly to the notion that she wasn’t going to stay in bed unless he watched her every moment, and unfortunately he no longer could (though he was still spending more of his time at her bedside than away from it). But if he couldn’t keep her in bed, he was at least going to bring her back to it when she inevitably wore herself out.

“You fell asleep again,” he said gently, which was not exactly an answer.

"Yes," Narcissa agreed, stretching. She felt a twinge of pain that settled in as she stilled, but nothing like it had been. This was more of an annoyance, really, and not as much of one as her flagging energy. Antonin had assured her it was normal, though she privately suspected the potions he was giving her had something to do with it.

Whatever the reason, she hated that it made Lucius worry. This whole ordeal was worse for him than for her. She'd gotten to sleep through most of it while he'd been forced to live through one of her worst nightmares from when the Dark Lord was at the height of his power. Back then, Narcissa had lost a lot of sleep just imagining what if. She still didn't know what she would do if their positions were reversed.

"I'm awake now," she said as she pulled him down for a kiss, though that didn't exactly answer his objection.

“I’m not sure you should be,” he retorted, but granted the kiss with a smile. Concerned though he was, it was an immense relief that she was beginning to feel well enough to move around. After a moment he settled himself carefully beside her on the couch, drawing her into his arms. “But I suppose you intend to stay that way, don’t you.”

He could have been more firm about it, but in all honesty, he was tired of the long, silent watches. Antonin had been wonderful, of course, and they had been fortunate in their other friendships as well, but the truth was that the only person Lucius wanted to talk to in a crisis was Narcissa. Worry for her health was foremost, of course, but he missed her when she was barely awake two hours out of ten.

“For a while,” Narcissa agreed as she settled in Lucius’s arms. She didn’t delude herself that she could stay up until they would usually retire for the evening--it was only early afternoon--but she did hope to get away with another short nap before dinner and then going to bed early. “I’m tired of sleeping all day. I feel like I’ve missed so much.”

Most of all, she’d missed the ability to sit like this with Lucius and discuss whatever came to mind or to just enjoy each other’s company. Narcissa could read Lucius’s worry in the way he was still oh-so-careful as he held her, but this was the closest to normal she’d felt since that night. She intended to make it last as long as possible.

"As far as I'm concerned," he said, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly, "nothing of import happened. Campaign season is exactly like you'd expect, the DMLE continues incompetent, the shops are full of chocolate rabbits and garish pastels. The universe has, I think, politely put all major happenings on hold until you're ready for them."

Narcissa laughed with delight. It felt odd after things being sober for so long, but good. Like things were finally starting to get back to normal. Lucius had always been able to make her laugh and Narcissa appreciated that held true even now. “As it should. It would be unforgivable for the universe to schedule something important while I couldn’t attend to it.”

“It wouldn’t dare.” Some of his tension eased at her laugh. “Although, unfortunately, I think you will be put to the test in the next few weeks. I get the feeling things are about to pick up, and there’s only so much rescheduling and sending our regrets we can do without arousing suspicion.” Lucius was fairly sure that even once Antonin had cleared her to be up and about, there would be a great deal of required rest between outings, which he would of course help to enforce. But however much he wished to keep Narcissa wrapped in cotton wool while she recovered, he couldn't very well do that when no one was supposed to know she was recovering. She would put a good face on it, but he didn't like to think of how exhausting that would be for her.

“Yes. We will have to go to the WICCA Casino Night on Friday. I can’t miss that.” She wasn’t certain she would be ready for a night out and on her feet that soon, but there wasn’t another choice. She had organized the whole event and was expected to be there from before it started until after it ended without a break. It would be a challenge, to say the least, and if she met it, she would have to spend all day Saturday in bed recovering. And once that was done, there was the election to contend with and Merlin only knew what else would come up. “After the election, we should go on holiday. A real one where we do nothing but relax and recover from all this.”

A horrible thought occurred to her then, and she blanched as she turned to look at her husband. “Lucius, were you injured in the fight?” She had obviously taken the brunt of the damage, but that didn’t mean he had escaped unscathed. She hadn’t even asked, but worse, the thought hadn’t even crossed her mind. “I didn’t even ask if you were, which is unacceptable. You’ve been so attentive and I-- I’m sorry.” It wasn’t adequate, nothing would be to make up for such a horrible oversight, but there was nothing else she could do at the moment, either.

He was surprised--with all that had happened, he hadn’t really thought about it either. He hadn’t been, of course; he’d had some boils from the furnunculus that faded within a day, nothing worse than an annoyance. He wouldn’t have expected her even to ask--of course he would have told her if something had happened to him. But he could read the guilt in her voice, and it was the last thing she needed to be feeling just now. He put his genuine surprise to use for a different purpose. “Don’t you remember? No, I suppose much of that first day is gone, isn’t it. You asked the first time you woke up after Antonin put you under.” Lucius almost never lied to her, but this one came easily.

“Oh. Good.” Narcissa relaxed at Lucius’s reassurance. Her memories of those first days were hazy, mostly just pain and Lucius’s presence at her side, with snatches here and there of clarity--Antonin telling her Lucius had gone to the study to arrange their schedules, Lucius figuring out how to hold her without hurting her, Cosmo stopping by with good news about the cur who had done this to her--but everything else until Marcelia’s visit was lost in fuzziness.

“We really should go on holiday,” she mused after a quiet moment. “I think you may need it more than I do. I know how you’ve worried.” She ran her fingers over his forehead, smoothing some of the lines that appeared there. He hadn’t had that many before all this, and she could still read the concern in his eyes. “I am healing.”

He closed his eyes at her touch, sighing quietly. “It’s not been my happiest fortnight ever, no. It would be nice to get away, when we can.” He caught her hand after a moment and kissed her fingertips. “What were you thinking? Somewhere sunny, perhaps. Spring in England is always so damp.”

He was already warming to the idea. They could go somewhere, just the two of them, and leave all their careful machinations aside for awhile. Normally he enjoyed the facade, of course, but that was when they were both at their best and could enact their plans together. This had been something different entirely. This had been him alone, trying to keep all of the plates spinning while the better part of his attention was on her recovery. The notion of taking a rest from it all, making up for lost time, was an irresistible one.

“I know.” Narcissa kissed him gently. “I’m sorry.” She laced her fingers through Lucius’s as she thought, carefully considering both locations they’d visited in the past and ones they’d talked about. Most of them just didn’t feel right, for reasons she couldn’t name, but one had just what she wanted. A touch of comfort and familiarity but plenty of new ground to explore. Romance. Culture. “Italy? The last time we stayed in the villa we did talk about seeing the rest of the country. We could take a few weeks, just the two of us, and see whatever strikes our fancy.”

They could go on a tour of Italy’s wizarding communities, enjoy the culture, and just reconnect. And when they returned, they’d be ready to face whatever Britain's wizarding community threw at them. Together.

Oh, yes. Italy would be perfect, he thought. “Not your fault, darling. But Italy sounds fantastic.” And it would be a good place to take things easy if Narcissa overextended herself, not that he would say as much. “Milan, maybe, and wherever else we want to drift to. We can stop in at the villa for a few days if we end up wanting to slow down a bit.”

“Italy it is, then.” Narcissa imagined shopping in Milan, riding a gondola in Venice, exploring the ancient ruins of Pompeii, and not worrying at all about what was going on back home. Once the election was over, they could leave whenever Antonin said she was well enough to travel. Although, that brought another thought to mind. “What about Antonin? Should we let him stay here while we’re away?”

At some point, they would need to decide how to handle the whole situation. Antonin had been staying as a guest in Malfoy Manor for nearly two months now, and though the situation that had caused Narcissa’s immediate concern was resolved, there were other factors to consider. His reaction to his employer’s sudden disappearance had worried both her and Lucius, and even in her weakened state, Narcissa had noticed the continued strain on Antonin’s face.

“Hmm.” She was right, that did require careful consideration. It wasn’t that Antonin couldn’t be trusted to look after the house in their absence, so far as that went. But he had been closer to the edge than usual lately, and Lucius didn’t know that they wouldn’t come home to find he’d done something rash and gotten himself pitched into Azkaban.

They could entrust him to Hallam’s supervision, perhaps, but--he was young, and didn’t fully understand what Antonin could be like. Neither, Lucius thought, did he have the influence over Antonin that he and Narcissa did. “Do you suppose--could we take him along, perhaps?” It wasn’t exactly the romantic getaway he’d been envisioning, but on the other hand, they did hope to relax while they were away. Knowing that Antonin wasn’t doing anything that might get him caught again--and having him on hand in case Narcissa needed additional care--would make that considerably easier to do.

It wasn’t what she had been picturing when she proposed a holiday either, but… “I think we may have to. I’m afraid he will end up in Azkaban again if we leave him here. The trick will be inviting him along in a way that doesn’t insult his pride. I’m certain he feels he’s already accepted so much from us that a holiday would be out of the question if we don’t give him a good reason.” It hadn’t been anything they couldn’t easily afford, and Antonin had more than repaid them for their hospitality with his recent assistance, but she understood Antonin didn’t see it that way.

“That, at least, is easily done. It won’t even require stretching the truth. I can just tell him that while we both desperately need to get away, I’m still very concerned about your health--which I am--and that I don’t think we would feel easy going if we couldn’t have him along to make sure you’re still mending as you should be.” The best lies were careful constructions of the truth, after all--and again, it wasn’t even a lie. That was certainly one of the reasons they wanted Antonin along, and in that capacity, he would be doing them a favour.

“I hope you won’t need to be by the time we leave.” Narcissa couldn’t deny that his concern was still justified at the moment, though, and she understood it felt unending. She idly traced a finger over the back of Lucius’s hand as she thought about Antonin’s reaction. He would protest, but if they made it about Narcissa’s health, he would come with them. “Yes. That should work. And perhaps at the end of the trip we could take him to Poland. I know he would like to try to reconnect with his family.”

“That’s a wonderful idea. He has done so much for us lately, it would be nice to repay the favour. Not to mention that if it goes well, it may help to mitigate some of his...current destructive tendencies.” Of course, there was also the possibility it wouldn’t go well, but Lucius figured they could cross that bridge when (and if) they came to it. They would be with him, after all, to rein in any ill-advised violence.

“Yes.” Narcissa rested her head against Lucius’s shoulder. “I’m starting to think we should just have him move in here permanently.” Even if a visit to his family calmed Antonin’s destructive tendencies some, they were sure to rise again, especially given the current political climate. Even after he started working at Twilfitt and Tattings--something he’d graciously delayed to be around while Narcissa recovered--she didn’t trust it would be enough to keep him out of trouble. Besides, “His flat can’t be pleasant. He would never let me see it.”

Lucius had been once, but he would spare Narcissa the details. It was one thing to know in theory that people lived in such cramped, awful spaces, but another thing entire when it was a personal friend. "Was that an idle musing or a serious consideration? I'm not against the idea. He's been a perfectly pleasant houseguest, and it would solve some of our concerns in the long term."

“It was idle musing, but perhaps we should seriously consider it.” There would be a lot of benefits, not the least of which was that Narcissa would feel better knowing their friend wasn’t living in an awful place. “We’d have to change the wards so he can apparate in, but I can’t think of any other downsides.” The more she thought about it, the more she truly thought it would be a good idea. “We’ll want to wait to tell him until after our holiday, but I think we should. Everyone will sleep easier knowing Antonin isn’t spending his evenings brooding alone.”

“Indeed.” Lucius hadn’t realized it, but the specter of turning Antonin loose on the world again had been looming somewhat in the back of his mind. Having it settled satisfied the part of him that liked to have every eventuality under control.

He shifted her a little, resettling more comfortably. “So what were you up to, to fall asleep in here?”

As Lucius settled them in, Narcissa made a pleased noise that morphed into an annoyed sound as he asked what she’d been doing. “Writing a letter to the ministerial candidates to invite them to Casino Night.” She gestured to the parchment sitting on the coffee table. “I remembered Lily Potter mentioned inviting the French Ambassador to help introduce the Mudblood scholarship we’re announcing”--and that got an eyeroll--”and I thought I ought to invite all of them so it doesn’t appear WICCA is backing her.”

She sighed heavily. That letter had not been how she’d wanted to spend her time out of bed, but it needed to be done. “I got the letter written, but you haven’t told me where you put my wand yet, so I couldn’t duplicate it.” She had no doubt that he’d brought it back with them, but until very recently, it hadn’t been a concern. She was only just feeling well enough to consider doing magic, particularly as Lucius and Antonin had been so willing to oblige with anything she needed. “I fell asleep trying to decide if it was worth getting up to look for it.”

“Hmm. Well, I was going to make you wait until you were well enough to fetch it on your own, but I suppose you’ve been moving about fairly well. Just don’t overdo it, darling.” He reached for his cane where it leaned against the side table, drawing out his wand to accio hers, passing it over with a smile. “Should we have Dobby bring us some tea while you work, or are you ready to go back to bed?”

“Thank you, dear.” Narcissa returned Lucius’s smile as she took her wand. It felt good to have it back, and it only took a moment to cast geminio and turn one letter into eight. “Let’s have tea. Dobby can send the letters out after he fetches it. And when we’re done, you can take me back to bed.” She turned and kissed him. “Promise.”