happier_bunny (![]() ![]() @ 2009-10-31 12:46:00 |
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Entry tags: | 2009 fall contest |
Post # 36 (late submission)
Title: Halloween sucks
Author: dottie_jane
Beta etextraordinary
Rating: PG-2 (in dog years)
Prompt: Halloween
A/N: This fic occurs in my animalcrackers!verse in which Brian and Justin are dogs. Emmett is their owner. It's intentional crack!fic, but it's beta'd so it's legit now!
Emmett loved Halloween. He loved any holiday or occasion that called for dressing up in costumes, and had two costumes for Halloween this year. One was for Lindsay's party with Gus and the second was for later when he went clubbing with Drew. After much cajoling, Emmett convinced Drew that they should go as a quarterback and cheerleader. It was quite a coup that Emmett talked Drew into being the cheerleader.
For Lindsay's party, Emmett decided to go as Little Bo Beep and dress the dogs up as his sheep. Emmett was confident that this was the costume that would least scare the children and not
offend their parents.
Brian, however, did not agree that this was the best idea. He looked stupid in his spandex doggie suit covered in white fluffy madness and Justin looked even worse. Brian smirked at Justin who could not figure out how to eat from his bowl without dipping his sheep ears into the dish.
Brian's smirk drooped into a frown when he remembered that the same ears were on his head. Why, oh, why did they have to match? And sheep? Bah! Couldn't Emmett
see the beautiful juxtaposition of his dark elegance to Justin's fair vision? Covering them up in cotton balls was an indignity, and Brian couldn’t stand it.
To make matters even worse - Justin's butt was covered by the costume. There was only so much Brian was willing to suffer through for Emmett and staying away from Justin's butt was just not going to happen. Brian decided to remedy the problem and tried to chew through the fabric, but Emmett caught Brian in the act and tugged him away from Justin.
"Be good, Brian, or I'll shove you into Mikey's old hot dog costume," Emmett warned.
Brian sulked the whole car ride to Lindsay's house. Justin nudged Brian and gave him a little lick on the nose, but Brian refused to be comforted by a sheep.
Once they arrived at Lindsay's house, Brian's mood perked up. Gus, dressed as cowboy and high on sweets, declared that Brian and Justin were his sheep and dragged them into the living room where a group of equally hyper children awaited them. Brian knew that he wasn't the world's best behaved dog, but he was certain that he did not deserve to be in this particular version of hell. Justin, on the other hand, was in absolute heaven and rolled around with the kids letting them pet him with their sticky hands.
When Gus was finally distracted, Brian snuck out of the living room and down the hall to the kitchen. He was pleased to see that Dumb Cat and Mean Cat, who each wore small little beanies and weird shoes, were just as unhappy. Apparently, they were suppose to be Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, but they just looked like ugly cats to Brian.
Brian was just about to feel sorry for himself, when the kitchen door swung open and his pal Mikey walked through the door followed by that really big dog, Ben. Poor Mikey was wearing a bonnet, a bib, and a diaper. A pacifier on a string hung around his neck.
Mikey walked up to Brian and sat down on his rump trying to pretend the world didn't exist. Brian took the opportunity to swat at the pacifier and watched mesmerized as it swung back and forth. Ben, who was wearing a small red cape, gave a little snorfle and looked away.
Brian watched as Justin walked into the kitchen and greeted everyone with licks and nuzzles. Justin gave Ben a particularly friendly lick and both Mikey and Brian barked at them. Brian went up to Justin and gave his butt a good long sniff to remind him who was the best butt sniffer around.
After about an hour, which is about 100 years to a dog dressed as a sheep, Emmett packed up the dogs and headed home.
Finally, de-sheeped and alone, Brian snuggled up with Justin in their doggie bed. Brian licked and pawed at Justin and was just about to start some butt licking when he heard Justin begin to snore. It's official, Brian thought, Halloween sucks.