testdog65 (![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} testdog65) wrote in ![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} qaf_crackfic,@ 2007-02-14 15:34:00 |
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Ode to Rizabeau
Original poster: xie_xie_xie
Crack comes in many flavors. There is bad!fic crack, there is deliberate crack, there is crack that comes out of the minds and keyboards of people in need of professional assistance and possibly a residental situation.
And then there is crack that simply walks up to you, crawls in your brain, and fills you with feelings of euphoria and joy so intense, so profound, that all your critical faculties are suspended, your intellect temporarily held in abeyance, your ability to stop reading or even do anything constructive such as feed and clothe yourself entirely disabled.... yes, I speak to you of Rizabeau.
Rizabeau, the goddess of fiction who wrote.... I can hardly breathe as I type this... blindfolded escort!Justin, one of the greatest fictions ever written in this fandom. A story (called by its author "New Year") in which Brian breaks up with Justin shortly after 202, for reasons that make no sense are not entirely clear at first. Justin, wounded, damaged, self-esteem in shreds, is also instructed by Brian to move out of Deb's immediately.
Which Justin, being the obedient waif he is, does, even though his mother is trying to reconcile with Craig and can't let Justin move back home, so Justin gets a studio apartment in a bad neighborhood and gets like three jobs, at one of which he is harassed for being gay and another of which is babysitting Gus, which ends because Michael, evil, jealous, loathesome Michael, connives to replace him. The other job is at a restaurant, but they can't give him enough hours to pay all his bills, pay his tuition, and, you know, eat.
Broken, hungry, losing weight, and unable to sleep so he goes out running around Pittsburgh in the middle of the night, Justin is barely clinging to sanity, indeed, barely clinging to life. He has dark circles under his eyes. His ribs are showing. HE HAS TO HAVE HIS PHONE DISCONNECTED. He has no air conditioning.
And Brian doesn't love him anymore.
One night at the restaurant, Brian comes in and Justin runs in the bathroom and throws up because it hurts so much to see him. Shortly after this, one of the other waiters tells him that a patron of the restaurant has fallen for Justin, but due to complications in his life, prefers to see him on a professional basis.
Yes, our Justin is about to become a hustler.
Well, not really. An escort.
Since the customer prefers not to have Justin know who he is, he asks him to wait for him at the hotel blindfolded.
Which works out really well because... well... let me put it in Justin's own words:
If Rizabeau had never written anything besides this gorgeous fic, she would have earned her place in my heart forever, but she wrote... oh, tons and tons more. Lots. So much I haven't even read it all, and since I understand her later works involved, you know, children, twins and stuff, I intend to leave it that way. She wrote a sequel to blindfolded!escort!Justin, called Spring Fever, in which we have evil!Chris Hobbes and gratuitous furniture buying and of course, THE LOVE.
In this fic, it takes Brian like, many many weeks to notice Justin will not look at himself in the mirror. In fact, they end up going to the Bahamas before Brian notices. He does fortunately fuck him better, but not before we establish that Justin still feels guilty for prostituting himselfin order to get enough to eat while not blaming Brian even though Brian orchestrated the entire thing and knew all along what he was doing and didn't just give Justin money to eat and live but fucked him repeatedly. Brian, being the soul of caring that he is, knows that all Justin needs is to be pushed up against a mirror and forced to look at himself being fucked, hard, by Brian, whose dick heals all wounds, even those inflicted by him.
Sigh.
This not being enough, we also have her brilliant Caprice/Ritorna a Me series, in which the loft apparently doubles in size because Brian had, for reasons never explained, well she does explain but her explanation makes no sense, had built these extra rooms over in theempty air unused space next to the elevator, including a full bathroom, and so Justin remodels everything and puts little throw pillows and blankets all around the loft because it's JUSTIN who has a thing for interior decorating, not Brian.
They start out on Capri where Brian buys him a bracelet with emotional significance and tells him he can never say he loves Justin but the bracelet will have to say it. Justin makes him promise never to give up on them, but of course as soon as they get home, Brian does, for reasons that make no sense at all, but just accept it because that's how you have to read Rizabeau, and then Justin runs back to Capri where they were once happy and Brian stalks him and anyway, they live happily ever after.
These are the best fics ever and if you haven't read them, you must read them now, because they are spine-tinglingly, heart-rendingly, mind-blowingly brilliant and full of the love, although you will have to skim a lot of stuff about interior design, paint colors, how to preserve baby footprints on hardwood, fashion design, and meals, all of which are totally non-essential to the story.
If you have been holding off on reading them because some intellectual elitist snob told you they were cracky, well, they are, but not that kind of crack. You must trust me. I would never lie to you.
New Year (blindfolded escort!Justin)
Spring Fever
Caprice
Ritorna a Me
I humbly and fervrently thankhappier_bunny for introducing me to this goddess. I have read New Year 578689 times. I worship that fic.
Tell me, do you have the Rizabeau love?
Which Justin, being the obedient waif he is, does, even though his mother is trying to reconcile with Craig and can't let Justin move back home, so Justin gets a studio apartment in a bad neighborhood and gets like three jobs, at one of which he is harassed for being gay and another of which is babysitting Gus, which ends because Michael, evil, jealous, loathesome Michael, connives to replace him. The other job is at a restaurant, but they can't give him enough hours to pay all his bills, pay his tuition, and, you know, eat.
Broken, hungry, losing weight, and unable to sleep so he goes out running around Pittsburgh in the middle of the night, Justin is barely clinging to sanity, indeed, barely clinging to life. He has dark circles under his eyes. His ribs are showing. HE HAS TO HAVE HIS PHONE DISCONNECTED. He has no air conditioning.
And Brian doesn't love him anymore.
One night at the restaurant, Brian comes in and Justin runs in the bathroom and throws up because it hurts so much to see him. Shortly after this, one of the other waiters tells him that a patron of the restaurant has fallen for Justin, but due to complications in his life, prefers to see him on a professional basis.
Yes, our Justin is about to become a hustler.
Well, not really. An escort.
Since the customer prefers not to have Justin know who he is, he asks him to wait for him at the hotel blindfolded.
Which works out really well because... well... let me put it in Justin's own words:
There was so much he didn't understand about their times together. The man never spoke, but he would hold Justin, even cuddle after they had sex. He would kiss him and get out of bed. Justin always listened to him get dressed and leave. He never took the blindfold off right away. He didn't want to come back from his fantasy. Because while he was blindfolded, he was with Brian. He heard Brian's voice where the man was silent, he felt Brian's hands on him when the man touched him. Those were Brian's moans when the man groaned his pleasure. Those were Brian's lips he touched when they kissed. It was Brian's cock filling him when he was being taken. It was Brian until the blindfold came off. When the blindfold came off, there was two hundred dollars on the bedside table, and when he went to shower, he didn't look in the mirror because it wasn't him that would look back, it wasn't Brian's Boy Wonder looking back, it was a whore.Pure. Emotional. Porn.
If Rizabeau had never written anything besides this gorgeous fic, she would have earned her place in my heart forever, but she wrote... oh, tons and tons more. Lots. So much I haven't even read it all
In this fic, it takes Brian like, many many weeks to notice Justin will not look at himself in the mirror. In fact, they end up going to the Bahamas before Brian notices. He does fortunately fuck him better, but not before we establish that Justin still feels guilty for prostituting himself
Sigh.
This not being enough, we also have her brilliant Caprice/Ritorna a Me series, in which the loft apparently doubles in size because Brian had, for reasons never explained, well she does explain but her explanation makes no sense, had built these extra rooms over in the
They start out on Capri where Brian buys him a bracelet with emotional significance and tells him he can never say he loves Justin but the bracelet will have to say it. Justin makes him promise never to give up on them, but of course as soon as they get home, Brian does, for reasons that make no sense at all, but just accept it because that's how you have to read Rizabeau, and then Justin runs back to Capri where they were once happy and Brian stalks him and anyway, they live happily ever after.
These are the best fics ever and if you haven't read them, you must read them now, because they are spine-tinglingly, heart-rendingly, mind-blowingly brilliant and full of the love
If you have been holding off on reading them because some intellectual elitist snob told you they were cracky, well, they are, but not that kind of crack. You must trust me. I would never lie to you.
New Year (blindfolded escort!Justin)
Spring Fever
Caprice
Ritorna a Me
I humbly and fervrently thank
happier_bunny for introducing me to this goddess. I have read New Year 578689 times. I worship that fic.Tell me, do you have the Rizabeau love?