Re: Part One His time away from Justin and Pittsburgh opened him up to Justin so much more in the long run though I'm not sure he is aware of it.
You know, I think he is aware of it on some level. I think we see it here:
“You loving me wasn’t the problem,” Brian says. Justin isn’t sure what he means by that. He’s thought for years that Brian left because of him, at least in part. Thought that Brian maybe noticed how close they’d been a little too late.
“If you’d stayed,” Justin says, “You probably would have loved me.”
Brian turns his head to stare at Justin, and for a minute, says nothing. Draws hard on his cigarette, stubs it out in the ashtray. Justin watches his hand twisting around the cigarette, and thinks he needs to learn to shut the fuck up.
Brian turns his gaze to the ceiling, and stares up at it, unblinking.
“I know,” he says.
I've always read this passage, particularly that first line of dialogue, as Brian admitting that he already loved Justin, ie that that was the problem and that's why he ran. But those intervening years have allowed him to realize and more importantly to accept his feelings for Justin.
At the same time, I agree that Brian isn't consciously pursuing Justin for anything except friendship. I don't really think he has any end goal except to spend time with Justin because he likes and admires him. And loves him! One thing I adore about this fic is that it's clear the love is based on much more than their incredible sexual chemistry; these two really are best friends as well. I think they are in canon too, but it's tough to see there amidst all the porn sex and tension and drama. Here they don't expect anything of each other, and they are now on more even footing in terms of life experience -- so they can simply enjoy each other's company. I find it so amazing to see. :-)