[The following is an envelope slipped into the silver ribbon on two packages tied together. Both packages are wrapped neatly in green paper The first package is a small box that holds a couple of potion bottles, about as long as one's thumb tall and an inch wide, that clank together gently with movement and the second chocolates.]
[On the front of the envelope.]
To: Regulus Black
From: Anonymous [Though the writing loosely resembles Snape's handwriting.]
[The letter inside reads as follows:]
Dear Regulus,
I have been watching you for quite some time and, though it pains me to admit it, find myself quite taken with you. The only problem with this is that I'm male, and I doubt someone such as yourself, from the very respectable house of Black, would take kindly to this. So, for now, unless you wish otherwise, I will remain anonymous. For, even if you did like males, I doubt I would be your first choice.
I've been thinking about you for months. Before I get to sleep, I find myself thinking on you and your perfect hair and the perfect curve of your lips -- and how I'd like to stroke my thumb along them and kiss them before bed. I think about your eyes, like a stormy sea, and the way you scowl when you're angry. And it is with those thoughts that I find peace and sleep. Last month, I thought to myself: what could I get someone, so charming and respectable, that has everything? And then... it hit me.
First, there's chocolate (that's the long, thin box, of course). One really can't go wrong with chocolate. I hope that it will make you smile a little, for I have always liked your smile. It was what first made me want you. The large box? Well, I know you've been having problems with your brother lately, so I brewed a couple of potions. That way you can get yours against him. I do hope you like them. Just pour all of each into your brother's drink (at seperate times of the day, of course).
The first (labeled one, they go in order of number -- but you'd know that) is to keep him silent for a day. I'm sure you could use the peace. The second is to give him boils across his face. That way he won't be able to brag about his good looks -- at least for a day. After all, the only thing good looking about him is that he slightly resembles you. The third is a deaging potion, so that he'll act his age. Fourth, A babbling potion, so that everyone can hear your brother's words for what they really are. Fiveth, a Forgetfulness Potion. And, lastly, a love potion as an illustration of how he usually acts in relationships -- like a mindless hippogriff. As a bonus effect, it'll give him a nice hard-on for a day.
Enjoy.
With much love,
Your Secret Admirer
![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
