Doctrine of Labyrinths Series, Mildmay/Felix, trust, "and in his mind, the monster's table with it's
I've been seeing Felix's dreams for about five days now, and let me tell you that his nightmares are just as fucked up as mine are. Last night was something about him and Strytch going at it and blood everywhere, and Kethe but if I never have to see that again it'll be too soon.
Anyway, I've mostly been ducking out of sight, because I don't know whether he can see me or not and I don't want to know. But as soon as I walk into Felix's dream this time I know that ain't gonna work. We're in a round room, all stone, and the only thing in there aside from the torches on the walls is this great big table. And strapped to the table is Felix. Around him are two...things. A fat man's body with a pig head, and another man's body- I recognize the rings as Robert of Hermione's and suddenly his head flickers into view. Felix is whimpering and fuck do I not want to be here.
I turn to leave, to hide, to do anything not to see this, but there's a wall in front of me and no doors out, none at all, and just as I've shut my eyes Felix starts /screaming/ bloody murder and I have to look.
The pig man is holding him down while Robert of Hermione does something hocus, grinning while he does it. Felix is screaming like somebody's cutting off his fingers and I just lose it. I run up, try to grab at the pig man, but my hands go right through him. Same with Robert of Hermione. I can't touch them and they can't see me-
And then Felix opens his eyes and looks straight at me.
"Mildmay," he whimpers, and I can see that he's choking himself trying to get at me. I immediately undo the strap around his neck, then those around his arms and wrists. As I unhook each tether, Felix bursts out like they'd been burning him. And maybe they had; after all, he'd been screaming loud enough. Finally I'm down to the ankle straps and by then Felix is clutching at me, sobbing a little, and then I'm rolling him off the table and against the wall, shielding him from the sight it.
"Felix?" I whisper. He's sobbing hard, gasping for breath and holding me tight enough to bruise. "Felix? C'mon sweetheart, answer me here." I pet his hair, which is short and spiky in the dream.
"M-Mildmay, y-you found m-m-me," he finally gulps, burying his head in my shoulder.
"Yeah, I did. So you're okay now, okay? I won't let Robert of Hermione or the pig- I mean, that other guy hurt you, okay? I promise."
"I know." His voice is almost too muffled to understand it. "I- I want to wake up, Mildmay. How do I wake up?"
Shit, fuck if I know. But that won't help. Instead, I say, "I'll find a way, trust me. Maybe if we leave the room?"
But he's already shaking his head. "No, no, there's no exit."
"Okay. Uh, if we can get your body to startle...but I can't get out until you wake up. Um, then, maybe if you pinch yourself?"
Again he's shaking his head but suddenly he freezes and looks up at me. He looks awful, cuts and bruises all over his face. His tears have made tracks through the dirt.
"I-I know how," he gulps. "Don't h-hate me, Mildmay, okay?"
"Okay," I promise without even bothing to consider.
He takes a deep breath and whispers, "Kiss me."
"...What?"
"Kiss me. I'll get hard, move in my sleep, and wake up."
Oh sacred bloody fuck, like that's something I want to do while our sleeping forms are about six inches apart. But I want to get out of this dream even more and I don't see any better options.
"Okay. Fine."
Then I lean forward and give him a peck on the lips. His eyes close as his brow unknits, but he doesn't look like he'll be getting hard anytime soon. Fuck, I have to do something more. Tentatively I pull him closer and open my mouth a little, pushing my tongue against his. He freezes for a moment, then slowly, slowly, begins to move his mouth in return.
Trying to think of things that always turned me on, I lean back on the floor, guiding him on top of me. He automatically spreads his legs over my hips, moving his tongue faster now. I let my hand slide down his side, to his hips, onto his thigh-
It works. Fucking hell it works, and he's hard against me and shit shit shit I'm hard against him and dammit I can't help pulling him closer as his hips grind me down painfully into-