LMOM #2: Wanting Sirius - Remus/Sirius, R Title: Wanting Sirius Author: elfflame Rating: R Pairing: Remus/Sirius Kink(s) : Fantasies, wanking Challenge: Lusty Month of May 2009 Word count: 522 A/N: Not quite a continuation of yesterday’s, but the same Remus. Can be read without reading the first. Unbeta’d.
Wanting Sirius Black was a bad idea. But Remus couldn’t stop himself. There was just something about Sirius. Some days, it felt as though he had always been there. In ways that James and Peter had not. Or maybe it was just that Sirius simply featured so heavily in Remus’s dreams, and the others did not.
Remus had watched him with his conquests though. Both the male and female variety. Sirius didn’t seem to discriminate, but he also didn’t seem to think it something beyond a bit of fun. And Remus couldn’t stand the thought of being treated like he was nothing special after. It hurt just thinking about it. So instead, he kept his thoughts to himself, saving his pent-up energies from watching Sirius all day for wanking late at night when he was sure the others were asleep.
He thought most about what it would be like to kiss Sirius. After all, he knew what that felt like—sort of. And he’d seen Sirius kiss a few others—accidentally, of course. Granted, Lily and Sirius were nothing alike. But he could almost imagine it, so it was more real than most of his other fantasies. More tantalizing. He could almost imagine how Sirius’s lips would feel on his, the wet slide as their tongues slid against each other, and most importantly of all, Sirius’s voice, husky in his ear, telling him how no one else had ever meant this much.
He often had to bite his lip as he stroked himself to keep from making any sounds the others might hear. Sometimes, he even allowed himself to imagine Sirius’s fingers joining his own on his cock, and how it would feel to have someone else—and even better, Sirius—touching him there; stroking him. How Sirius would know just how to twist his wrist to make him come. It would be perfect and beautiful. Right up to the next day, when Sirius would act as though nothing had happened.
At least he could have this, even if nothing else. The image of Sirius above him, imagining the heat of his body pressing against his side as their fingers twined around his own cock. He could imagine Sirius’s wicked whispers in his ear. Because he knew they would be. And usually, that thought was all it took for him to come, biting back a sharp cry.
Sometimes he didn’t quite manage to stifle the cry, but the others didn’t tease him about it too much. After all, it was no more than they did themselves late at night. And usually in the morning, all was forgotten but for a bit of joking.
Remus tried to convince himself that it didn’t make what he was doing more tempting, when he thought of the fact that Sirius was likely listening to him wank just beyond those curtains. That if he pulled them apart, Sirius might even be able to watch. Or perhaps, just perhaps…want to join in?
But that was a road he couldn’t let himself go down. It just wasn’t safe. And that was one thing that Remus could never get past.