Title: Needs Rating: R Pairing: Remus/Lily, mentioned James/Lily Wordcount: 1500 Kink(s): adultery, pegging Challenge: LMOM 2009 Summary: There are several reasons why this is worse then anything Peter ever did to Sirius. Notes: me and hpsauce are fic prompting each other every day. this was "remus/lily(and/or)alice - pegging". i always write better with a prompt.
Remus is not a rat-fink bastard, he assures himself. When Peter slept with Marlene, Sirius' girlfriend at the time, James and Sirius had gone ballistic. Remus had felt much less emotional about the situation. Sirius had ignored Marlene's requests for chess games and dates to Hogsmeade, and all the lovey stuff that couples were supposed to do in favour of spending time with the other Marauders. Peter had ended up being a boyfriend without the term used, he'd felt bad when Sirius blew her off so he tried to pay attention to her. When they ended up fucking, not a Gryffindor in the dorm should have been surprised. Still, majority rule was the rule of the Marauders, so Remus had pretended that Peter had committed a horrible act.
Peter had grovel for months before Sirius showed any resemblance of forgiveness. Remus knows that if this comes out, James will never forgive him. For all that Sirius is the more hot-headed friend, he eventually comes to reason. Sirius was a Black in his formative years, he knows that right and wrong are merely words, not something concrete. He might feel it's important to look down on Peter for what he did, but deep down he knows that Peter's action was just another action. James Potter was home schooled by kind but morally driven parents, commitment is a key term in his life. If James finds out, he will never be forgiven.
In some respects, what he's doing isn't that much different then Peter. He's having sex with another man's woman- though he's had it drilled into his head by enough Gryffindor feminists that no man has a woman, the phrase still persists. More then that, he's trying to take away his best friend's girlfriend, not just any man's girl.
In some respects, it's completely different. For one, Peter only had sex with Marlene once before being caught. Remus and Lily have been having it on for months, and no one has a clue. A second difference, Marlene was just a fling, and Marlene, Peter and Sirius all knew it. Lily and James are engaged, only waiting on Lily's constant attempts to try to get her sister's blessing before they actually get married. Remus feels slightly less horrible, because they aren't actually married. And really, if they're waiting for Lily's cunt sister to bless them, they'll be engaged in their eighties.
In the most important respect, the only thing that would make the entire situation worth having, it's so different it's like comparing Gryffindors and Slytherins. Peter was having heterosexual sex with Marlene. Remus, for all intents and purposes, isn't. It's not that Lily polyjuices into another male, Remus isn't ready for that and the ingredients would wipe him out, he can't find a solid moneybag as it is. It's just heterosexual sex does not consist of a male getting fucked in the arse.
He's always had inklings that he's different, and not just in a 'the only werewolf at Hogwarts' kind of way. More along the lines of looking at James in the shower for a moment too long, not casting a silencing spell when Peter forgot to cast his during the late night wanks. But it's not like the wizarding population is open to those kinds of ideas. Everything is about bloodlines, and every time two families marry, one line is swallowed by another. Remus, as a wizard, is nearly required to have children. Saying 'no thanks, I'd rather fuck blokes' is just not an option.
There has to be an underground system, Remus is sure of that. There are so many secrets in this world, werewolves and dragons and portraits used as spies on muggles, that there just has to be a way to go about having sex with other gay wizards. He just hasn't found an opening yet, and absolutely no pun intended, though he knows all three of his friends are juvenile enough to snicker if he ever said something like that out loud. At least before they shunned him. Every man has their limits, and while werewolves apparently don't cross them, not wanting offspring would. It's the most taboo thing in this world, worse then using the three curses.
So when Lily accosted him one Sunday dinner while the other three had already started playing poker, asking him if he was ever going to get a boyfriend, Remus had almost Obliviated her on the spot. Instead he hushed her, and realised in that moment of seeming upset instead of laughing out loud, he'd cemented her idea of his sexuality. Remus had begun asking for a whole series of promises, all collapsing to 'please don't tell', when she interrupted him.
"Wives know about these things. There are ways that you can still satisfy at least some of what you need." and Remus had crossed his arms, expecting some rubbish about love spells, but instead she had been quite practical.
She'd even set a regular appointment for it, like it was something as simple as getting wardrobe fittings. Every Tuesday night he was to meet her at Knockturn Alley's Empress Motel. Seven pm sharp, he'd walk into the room, and she'd always be ready and waiting.
The device itself looks silly. Women are not supposed to have phalluses, that's the entire point of a difference between sexes. But Lily will be sitting in a grubby armchair, reading a charms book casually, nude except for the strapping that holds a plastic penis to her.
Remus tends to waste no time, small talk at a time like this seems awkward at best, off putting at worst. The one night they'd had a conversation about Turner's Theory of Reduction before the main event, he hadn't been able to get hard. Lily slips a bookmark into her text as Remus strips down. He tosses his clothes onto scratchy carpet, and she meets him near the door for a kiss.
Remus tries not to think of James, but he knows this isn't how she kisses him. He's seen her kissing James, it's full of passion and love. More often then not Lily kisses Remus on the forehead, not the lips, a dry peck you reserve for grandparents. She murmurs a spell- they've done this often enough that a wand is no longer needed- and she moves to stand behind him. The plastic phallus feels hot against his buttock, it's even wet at the tip like Remus imagines a man's would be.
Sometime Lily takes him against the wall. He casts a cushioning spell where his faces lands, because there's no reason to turn it to the side. If he did he'd only see her red hair swinging, another reminder of what's actually happening. It's bad enough he can feel breasts resting against his mid-back, he doesn't need any more clues.
Every time Lily pounds into his arse, it reminds him this is what he really wants. In the future he might be the next Molly Weasley with five children clustered around his feet as he tells them a bedtime story. But that can't change the fact that a cock slamming into him, slick and hot and pressing against his prostate with every stroke- it feels good. He can't help but be grateful that Lily cooks by hand, magic be damned, and has small cuts and calluses on her hands. Her hands don't feel female- she doesn't put up with pretty manicured nails either- and it makes it so much better.
When he comes, spurting white fluid on her hand and the wall and his belly, her hand stretches upwards. He licks her palm, tastes the come and wishes with all his heart that it could be somebody's besides his own. He leans bonelessly against the wall, panting and feels a slight tingle as she casts a cleaning charm and the spunk comes off the wallpaper.
He asked her, once, why she would do something like this. Remus might lose- no, will lose, there's no sense in deluding oneself- a best mate if James finds out, but Lily loses the love of her life, the father of her future children, and the person who's desperate to take care of her, even as she joins the Order and demands real missions.
Lily responds by explaining that Marauders did those things for each other. She might not turn into an animal at will for him, but she can fuck him, if that's what his primary need is. Remus refrains from asking what she does for Sirius and Peter. He doesn't really want to know.