I hate vampires. They all think they’re so clever when they’re ‘sneaking up on you’ in the dark. They just think they’re so evil and bad and dangerous, but then they die so easily, like those annoying flies that you have to splatter against the window because they won’t stop buzzing around like they’re important.
I’ve turned so many of them to dust that I’ve officially lost count. Why do there have to be so many? Can’t they just realize that they should stop trying to eat people and go somewhere else?
I swear, they love following me around in dark alleys, so that they can gape and then die. Seriously, I’m not that amazing. There’s no need to stare. It’s rude.