InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "You stupid meat golem."

theprettybeta (theprettybeta) wrote in paradisolog,
@ 2016-04-15 00:17:00

Entry tags:

~isaac lahey (theprettybeta), ~lydia martin (eunoia)

WHO: Isaac Lahey and Lydia Martin
WHERE: Lydia's shelter
WHEN: Early Friday Morning
WHAT: Feels. Just accept that there's going to be a lot of feels.
WARNINGS: So many feels.
STATUS: Closed/Incomplete

I was left alone. Still, I waited for the day when she'd say "I will always love you."

It had been two years. Two full years for Isaac, and in those two years he spent every moment he had trying to concentrate on sifting through the complicated, complex emotions that he had originally ran away from. For two years, Isaac Lahey convinced himself that he was getting better, and last night that all fell apart in one fell swoop. Two years of denial unraveled into an explosive outburst, one that pushed away the only person who had ever shown him mercy who was still alive, and it was his own fault. Isaac shouldn't have bothered convincing himself that he was strong enough to move past what had happened to him. Perhaps he would have been able to go his entire life pretending, but he should have known the second he found out that Beacon Hills had followed him there that it was all going to fall apart. Maybe a part of him did know that, and he had just been waiting for the dam to break. It finally did, and with it came a flood of everything he had locked away. Anger, betrayal, guilt, fear, all of it was drowning him, and the worst part was that Isaac had no one to turn to.

He didn't know people here, and he was mostly afraid that unloading everything he felt would paint Allison out to be monster if he did it to anyone who didn't know her. He didn't want that. There were only a few people here who knew Allison, Stiles, Scott and Lydia, and none of them were ideal for Isaac to speak to. Scott for obvious reasons, Stiles because they never got along. And Lydia... she had gone through the same thing. She didn't need to relive it just because Isaac had to. He had tried to stay neutral in the little spat between her and Scott, they were both being hyper sensitive and Isaac, honestly, wanted nothing to do with any of it. But apparently that wasn't good enough, and now he wanted to make sure that Lydia was okay after Scott had started to bring up the past, again. She was pregnant. What the hell was he thinking, trying to upset her like that in her state?

So, Isaac wanted to check on her. He liked to think that Stiles would have taken care of Scott to make sure that he would stop putting Lydia down, at least publicly, but Isaac had a feeling that it was only wishful thinking. He reached her shelter just after sunrise, calling out quietly to avoid waking her if she was still asleep because he didn't want to stick his head in if she wasn't decent. "Lydia? I brought you something." More combs, now that she had found her shampoo, and a little more coconut oil just in case. "Are you awake?

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theprettybeta
2016-04-27 04:59 am UTC (link)

She spoke so firmly with such certainty that, for just a moment, Isaac almost believed her. He looked at her and had gone to look away, because that was what he was supposed to do, look away, avoid eye contact, but she was staring at him and holding him there. At first he wasn't sure if she was doing it on purpose, but she must have been, and that was how he knew she wanted him to hear her.

He opened his mouth to argue, because there were so many things that could have gone wrong and so many reasons why that wouldn't have worked, but for some reason in that moment Isaac couldn't think of a single one. She had meant it. He could tell by the way she was speaking to him that she had meant it, and Isaac had never had someone so invested in his well being before with no ulterior motive. Even Derek, who had saved him from his fathers wrath, had done so because he was trying to build his own pack, but Lydia had no reason to offer him help other than, apparently, wanting to. Because she understood. She was the only person in the world who could have understood.

So, instead, Isaac caved. He seemed a little stunned as he stared at her in disbelief, because he was stunned, and maybe that was why it was so hard for him to argue with her. She had caught him off guard.

"I'll try." It was all he could do. Isaac wasn't one to make promises he couldn't keep, but that one he could. "I don't - I'm not sure if I can actually do it, Lydia, but I'll try. Not now, but... after you and Malia have the babies. Then I can try. As long as I'm not alone."

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eunoia
2016-04-27 01:50 pm UTC (link)

Lydia gave him a small, encouraging smile. "Trying is a start," she replied, taking his hands and giving them what she hoped was a reassuring squeeze. "You won't be alone, I promise."

That was good enough for now. Isaac was still wavering, that much was clear, but if he was truly willing to try, that was good enough.

"Come on," she said finally. "Let's head back."

[ooc: wrap?]

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