Dean Winchester (lovemesomepie) wrote in parabolical, @ 2009-01-14 18:11:00 |
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Entry tags: | dean winchester, jo harvelle |
Who: Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle
What: Dean makes a very hard decision
Where: A small, seldom used park.
Status: In Progress
Rating: TBD
Dean didn't really want to be here, but he didn't know what else to do. Ben being kidnapped, the whole process of waiting on the paternity results, and the memories of hell that just wouldn't seem to go away left him with very little choice. Since Lilith took Jo, and told her all about what had happened to him in Hell, what he had become down there in the Pit, Dean tried to pull away. He didn't mean to, but a serious relationship just felt so 'normal' and Dean sure as hell didn't feel normal. He went to the garage and clocked in on time, he came home to his family, but on his time off he was more often than not researching his next hunt or trying to decide if Ben's affinity for AC/DC marked him as a Winchester or if his ability to use a computer marked him as someone else's. Dean Winchester was NOT normal.
This was best, he told himself, for him and for Jo. A woman connected to the Winchester family was in a dangerous position. It helped that Lilith was gone now, but with the damned luck he had in this city, one of the figures that he was starting to remember from his time down in the pit would show up any minute, and Dean didn't want to risk it. It was different for his Mom, who was in too deep to go back, and for Heather who was with Sam, the one who hadn't turned into something little better than a demon in Hell. Everyone could say that it was ok, that he held out for longer than most would have, but in the end it wasn't ok, not for Dean, and sure as hell not for the souls he had ripped to shreds. Some days, he felt like he only had a little bit of normal, a little bit of real 'good' left and the rest of him was memories. If he was gonna be a dad, he knew that that had to go to Ben. Sarcasm and dirty jokes could work with most people to hide things, but the kid deserved better than that.
He deserved stability, he deserved someone looking out for him...he deserved all of the humanity that Dean Winchester had left after fourty years down there.
But God, did it have to hurt so much?
He knew that Jo would be fine. She'd have Cox and Jack to look out for her, she would still have everyone at the house, because they were her "family" and friends no matter what, and she'd be a hell of a lot safer. The only change would be that he and Jo wouldn't be dating anymore, but Dean hoped that she'd still let him come to the Roadhouse and tease her about her obsession with hair bands, that they'd still remain the close friends that were almost family. He knew his parents adored her, that she had always been a good friend to him and Sam...and he didn't want to lose her entirely. He sure as hell couldn't imagine her disappearing from his life entirely.
Sighing, he waited on her to show up.