InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "What sanity?"

Penelope Clearwater (clearpenny) wrote in pandorarpg,
@ 2011-10-21 23:05:00

Entry tags:

!status: complete, ^date: october 30 2003, character: hermione granger, character: penelope clearwater

Characters: Penelope and OPEN
Setting: Library, Diagon Alley; 12:20
Content: Worksafe.
Summary: She just had to be around people.

The events of the previous night had shaken Penelope, to say the least. For a moment she thought she was having another flashback, but that one went longer than usual and while being completely realistic it wasn't a memory. It was a merging of two great fears. She had found herself back in a cold dark cell, hearing the eerie slither of the great snake. The mere thought of it made her skin crawl and her body shake for the entire morning.

Only by noon was she able to begin to pull it together. It was at that point that she realized that she really didn't want to be alone, that she craved company to drive away the fear, to bring back a sense of normalcy.

Despite still feeling jittery she was able to apparate herself to the library, where she chose to sit on a couch close to the entrance, having pulled a book from the shelf to pretend to read. Instead she peeked over the top of the book every so often to watch folks come and go. She knew from the journal entries that many people have had similar startling experiences with dreams. She wondered whether most people had gotten over that and moved on with their lives. Or whether they continued with their day feeling unsettled and on edge as she did.

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clearpenny
2011-10-22 06:41 am UTC (link)

"That's alright," Penelope said, trying to downplay how much her nerves really had been affecting her. "It sounds like everyone has been having dreams lately." Or flashbacks as she has had. She did remember seeing someone inquiring about waking dreams. It made her feel less crazy, but it wasn't that much more reassuring. If anything it made her anxious of what this may mean.

"Same," Penelope said, even though she was moreso referring to the flashback. "I just need to be around others right now. I had owled in sick this morning since I wasn't feeling too well this morning." But now she found herself feeling too disturbed to be alone. "Have you found anything of interest yet?" Penelope asked, eyeing the book.

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weasley_now
2011-10-22 01:29 pm UTC (link)

Hermione was very observant of what went on around her. She used her mind not only to hold academic facts but to interpret the world around her. It was a skill Hermione had trained herself to do. If it weren't for the war she likely would have been a majority book sense with very little common. "It would seem that is the case," she responded.

Turning the book over in her lap she caressed the front cover. "I spoke with a lady earlier that said her encounter was more about emotion than an actual event." She turned her head back toward her table. "I've taken a few notes but nothing that I've had the time to really internalize." She didn't mention that she wanted to wait to talk to Harry to see what he had learned that day about the phenomenon.

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clearpenny
2011-10-23 05:19 pm UTC (link)

"I see. That makes sense," Penelope said, finding that it was probably true enough for her too. Neither of the elements of her 'flashback' if it could be called that went together. Instead they had been two separate events where she experienced fear, and were the most frightening things to her.

"Was that true for you too?" she asked, and quickly adding in. "If you don't mind me asking. I really don't mean to pry."

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weasley_now
2011-10-23 05:39 pm UTC (link)

For Hermione the dream had started as a typical work dream. For her the dream spoke volumes because the terror came as a part of her regular routine. That is what had scared her most. To know that at any moment something seemingly normal and innocent could turn dark and maniacal was not a part of reality she wanted to deal with. They had all dealt with that to a point in the previous years and she hated the thought that such things could build up yet again.

"Mine was tied to a very specific event," Hermione's dream was completely the opposite of what Rosalind claimed to have experienced. "I can only think of a few other incidents that could have elicited such fear." She didn't even think she had been so afraid when Bellatrix tortured her.

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clearpenny
2011-10-23 06:01 pm UTC (link)

"I'm so sorry to hear," Penelope said in response; as she had a very real idea and experience of such a feeling.

"Mine's was rather unusual like that other lady's. It wasn't a single event, it was a couple really disturbing experiences brought together. If that makes sense." Well that was how it was different than a regular flashback. It was her deepest fears finding a common setting, even though they were separated by time and place.

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weasley_now
2011-10-23 06:19 pm UTC (link)

Hermione gave a simple nod trying not to allow her mind to go back to bits of the war that she rather forget. Yes, there had been several victories for them, but there had been just as many let downs.

As Penelope spoke, Hermione wished she had her quill and parchment with her. She mentally noted to look up dreams that jump scenes. Surely between all these small details something would come to light. Since her morning exchange with Harry Hermione had heard rumors that a body had been found in the Department of Mysteries. It had just heightened her resolve to look into these dreams. She had a nagging feeling that the two were intricately related.

"It makes complete sense," Hermione assured her. "It seems each of us had strikingly familiar yet completely individualized experiences."

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clearpenny
2011-10-23 06:55 pm UTC (link)

Penelope nodded. It did sound that way. She looked down at Hermione's book and then back at her. She wondered if she were disturbing the other girl with her own restrained nature. She was wondering whether she was displaying that part that she had long worked to hide too easily now that there was something that truly did shake her up.
"I probably shouldn't distract you from your research for too long. Best wishes--I hope that these were just a one-time thing." She started to get up, taking her herbology book with her. She gave Hermione a brief smile. "Thanks for stopping by. It was good seeing you."

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weasley_now
2011-10-23 10:55 pm UTC (link)

"Don't worry about it, you didn't distract me," Hermione shifted in her seat so she could stand. It was obvious Miss Clearwater wanted to be left to her book. "I was just taking a break and our conversation has been very helpful. It has given me another insight."

She stood and bounced a little to give her legs a slight stretch. "I too hope that this was just a rare phenomenon. Good day." With that Hermione turned and made her way back to the table where her other items were awaiting her return.

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