InsaneJournal

She shouldn't be here. There was already enough to get through today without having to face this, but she hadn't been back at Hogwarts in years. Keeping in touch with Professor Trelawney never required her to walk these hallowed halls again. It was a lot more than she needed to deal with on such little sleep and her hormones all over the place to the point where she wasn't sure if she wanted to cry or yell at someone. Although maybe that was why she had to come back, why she needed to see this place again, allowing her mind to finally rectify the stories with physical location in hopes that it might settle something in her.

Except she felt anything but settled.

Even if she didn't remember all of it, she still had nightmares that took place right here. Lavender felt like at any moment Fenrir Greyback was going to attack her again - although all she really saw was the stray student on his way to the Great Hall. Looking over the entrance and down the marble staircases it all seemed so innocent - almost like that night hadn't happened, but it had and here she was again. This time a few years older, hopefully a little wiser, and still strangely worried about what was going to happen next.

This time Harry Potter wasn't coming back to save the day. In a little while they were going to be putting him to rest and the world didn't feel like a safe place. She certainly didn't feel safe. And that was when the careful distractions of bread making and outfit picking stopped working. Pressing her eyes closed she tried to keep it bay, but she was too far in it to be able to shake this feeling. Lavender turned her back to balcony, sinking down against the railing and just let go a little, hoping that some unsuspecting Hogwarts student wouldn't happen across her. She just needed a few minutes to let it pass and then maybe she would be ready - whatever that meant.