Crooked Characters: Iron Man and...Cap? Setting: NYC and Despair Content: I never know how to answer this Summary: Hammer keeps making unnerving announcements that have so far led to nothing, and something's up with Cap.
Sure, detainment, fines, arrests. Bring it. Unless Thor was back amongst the tiny people and forgot to give Tony a call before hooking up with those pricks at S.H.I.E.L.D., Tony couldn't bring himself to feel very threatened. If these 'New Avengers' really did their jobs instead of focusing on chasing Iron Man around highrises and church steeples, then no one would have anything to worry about anyway. There would be no reason for superfluous vigilantism and every happy little person would feel all safe and warm in their cozy little houses. Except for this guy, curled under a sleeping bag on top of a steaming grate on the sidewalk. Iron Man dropped down next to him, ice crunching under his boots, startling the guy before kneeling down and snapping up his faceplate. "Hotdog?" Iron Man offered, "Or pretzel?"
That turned out to be a complicated order after the chick putting together the hotdogs sneezed and spattered her personal DNA all over her cart. "Zorry," she muttered, "dis cowd..." but that didn't stop Iron Man from graciously paying her then dumping the food in the trash. The guy by the grate got a slightly different meal from the deli in the grocery store, but he didn't seem too put out by the selection. All along the way, more people were sneezing or coughing into their sleeves, and one mucousy child actually slapped a slimy hand on Iron Man's hip to get his attention, but the grocery store had disinfectant, too. He could deal. Deep, filtered-air breaths.
Winter was far less disgusting in the air; a little grey, with the skyline blending into the horizon, but the light shining from the city itself as determined as ever. Even the alleys were brightly lit, nooks to be discovered and explored-- God, Tony knew that was too sickeningly optimistic for today. There was a scuffle, of course, preceded by a loud crash and bang of garbage cans that caught Iron Man's attention and had him doubling back, following the jittery bark of a back alley fight. He didn't have to look far-- a woman tear-assing out of one of those happy little nooks screaming blood murder was direction enough. She saw him, too, and jabbed a finger back the way she had come, "My purse, those ---", and used some language Tony had never heard out of Nick, let alone someone under 100 with a lot less to be angry about. It caught him up for a second, hovering over the sidewalk with her screaming obscenities, hands up in case she got herself tackled by the cops for that level of disturbance, but he got the picture already. He darted down the alley, spotting four big bodies at the end that had no right picking on someone that lady's size, though the size of her mouth might have made up for it. It was three on one down here, though, and they didn't have eyes for Iron Man like their primary victim did, forcing him to snap, "Hey! Break it up!" to get their attention. Didn't they know who's neighbourhood this was? The best bagel shop in town was just around the corner.