Keeping it together was one way of putting it. More like keeping himself occupied so he didn't run mad. This wasn't the time for that. He sipped his coffee, making a face at it before putting it down. Saints, he was rubbish at making coffee. Which just made the void already there bigger.
Saints, he couldn't think about it. But it would keep coming up.
He spared Leto and Jerome a nod, and his expression softened as he saw Levon. If anyone understood what he was going through it was them. They were missing family as well. And the boy, of everyone, he deserved to be trapped in this hell less than anyone else. And now he'd lost his uncle as well.
Fuck, he hated this bloody ship.
Res and Keane were next, and honestly, he would have welcome any humour right now, dark or otherwise. The tension was just growing as the room filled. People who expected him to have a plan. Which he did, Cath always had a plan. Several of them, in fact. But they weren't going to be privy to all of them. Just the ones that mattered to them.
Sean came alone, looking like he'd forgotten sleep again in his quest to protect all of them. Cath couldn't reprimand him today, he'd not slept either. Couldn't sleep, not in their room, with the pillows and bedsheets smelling like Mae. He was going mad enough without tormenting himself on purpose.
He nodded to Kevin's comment. "Aye," he agreed. His note had been torn to shreds in a fit of anger. "Mine's been gone for 14 years. Bless her soul." He crossed himself. "Apparently, it's the bloody ship." Probably possessed by some sick demon. It figured. At least they had still had a priest. Thank God.
Ronnie's entrance caught his attention. "We've all gotten them," he told him. His calm, grim facade broke for a heartbeat as he looked down and shook his head. "Still no sign of her."
He clenched his jaw tightly, forcing himself to calm as much as he could. "We need to organize search parties," he said, dragging himself to the idea at hand. "One to search for Mae and Alexander, the other to track down the crazy shrew that escaped. She's dangerous, she can't be left to rampage. She's already badly hurt two people."
Cath wanted to search for Mae. He should be searching for Mae. But he knew when it came down to it, he should be helping find the crazy bitch randomly mauling people. Outside of the few experienced military men they had, he was one of the most experienced fighters on the ship. Especially guerrilla warfare.
"Sean, I want you to head up the search for her. This is your area, not mine." He took a deep breath. "I'm with you if you'll have me." He turned his attention to the others. "Res, Ronnie, divide up everyone else and start searching the ship. Recruit more people if you need it."