notbaraka (notbaraka) wrote in no_good_deed, @ 2010-12-18 10:56:00 |
|
|||
Entry tags: | deadpool, incomplete, old pc: threnody |
Who: Deadpool and Threnody
What: Deadpool is engaging a group of pigeon terrorists in the woods when his unit is betrayed by a mole on the inside. The scent of his carcass attracts a lovely young lady to his neck of the woods. Hopefully hilarity ensues.
When: Saturday Morning
Where: The Wooooooooooooods. OOOooOOoOoo Spooooky!
Rating: It's Wade so probably PG-13 to R
"The days and nights were dragging on and on for our strapping young hero. Cabin fever was beginning to set in and his only source of outlet was quickly drying up. On top of that, the pine cones weren't nearly as fun to wipe with anymore. The intrepid mercenary was starting to get a rash from all the sap. Sure, it made his buns look lip smacking good but comfort before fashion had always been his motto. What he wouldn't give for some action." Deadpool sighed and leaned back against the tree.
"Deadpool sighed and leaned back against the tree. The Olsen Twins had not been returning his calls and he knew why; Their ultimatum to choose one or the other weighed heavily on his heart. Who to choose? Who to love? Who to string along? And who would ultimately end up his mistress? The conundrum was enough to drive a man like him back to sanity. There was but one bit of silver lining: The Fox Network purchased the rights to his show The Olsen Decision. Soon he would be an even more powerful mercenary." The masked merc looked around his little encampment. The sniper rifle was set up near by, its powerful scope trained on the mansion further down the hill. As much as he liked narrating his life, it wasn't nearly as much fun without Weasel on the other end. Stupid radio silence.
An alternative way to pass the time was now Wilson's primary objective; the mansion all but forgotten. Somewhere in his rutsack, halfway between the stash of Abba Zabba bars and Porn Magazines, he found a small bag. He pulled the bag out to investigate further. Inside he found his old sling shot and a stash of marbles. It seemed today was looking up...
--------------------------------
"Roger that bravo leader. This is Chimichanga69, making way to base camp, do you copy?"
"Brrrzt! Brrrzt! Repeat Chimichanga69. You are not clear for extraction! I repeat you are not clear for BRRRZT!"
"Damnit Jim! I'm a Doctor, not a Bystander. I say Simon Pheonix has fifty hostages and an army'o'pigeons new from Bandai! hold up in there. And I have no other alternative.. but to blast my way in." The argument between Wade "Chimichanga69" Wilson and Wade "Bravo Leader" Wilson lasted a good fifteen minutes before he was given the green light. Military operations were always a bitch and usually ended in childish name calling...at least where Wade was concerned.
The merc moved across the woods in a prone position, armed to the teeth. When he spotted the first pigeon terrorist he unleashed his marble of doom. That wasscally bird took to the sky and flew away. Leaving the merc cursing a storm due to bad intel. "Damn it Bravo Leader! You didn't tell me they had jet pack technology!"
"That's because you walked right into a trap, Chimichanga69."
"What? No! It can't be! You're working for Pheonix!" It was then that Wade noticed the trees were filled with pigeons. His warped sense of reality turned the scene from every day occurence to something horrible and twisted; like Erkel.
"You have been a thorn in our sides for years chimichanga69. Now it's time to take you out."
"Sweet! I vote Chinese."
"We..we meant take you out as in kill you." Wade's right hand pulled the gun from his holster and brought it slowly towards his head.
"No! Don't do this bravo leader!" Wade's ever loyal left hand intervened, pushing the gun away. Still Bravo Leader fought back. "I never did tell you! I'm.. I'm carrying your child!"
"That child is an abomination! I never loved you!" Bravo leader over powered the left hand. The silenced gun shot echoed through the small clearing and Wade's dead body slumped to the ground.