InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I am Spartacus!"

Marcella Bellini (born_greater) wrote in nevermore_logs,
@ 2020-08-29 00:05:00

Entry tags:

erica lowsley, marcella bellini, much the miller's son

WHO Marcella, Much, Erica
WHEN Friday night
WHERE Diogenes Club
WHAT information dump
WARNINGS none

Marcie headed out to Diogenes straight after finishing work. Her hours were long currently, as John was catching up on his cases and required overtime to get things done, and she had been too tired to go and find Much. But tonight was Friday, she could sleep in in the morning, and Malcolm might not ask where she had been.

Being around John again was not the same as it had been before. The man was tanned and relaxed after his holiday, ready to swan in and bark orders and be the boss again, but Marcie felt less like being the snooty bitch she’d been before. Instead she went with aloof, not really saying much to anyone beyond the polite or perfunctory.

And Malcolm. She couldn’t forget the words she’d heard, the warnings impressed upon her, and it made her a little wary, although she tried not to make it noticeable. She knew Malcolm was sharp, though. She knew she couldn’t smooth things over forever. That’s why she’d decided to end things soon, as soon as she could arrange it. She had already drafted a resignation letter, and made sure she had enough money in her accounts to survive for a couple of months. She just didn’t intend to leave empty-handed. Anything that might be useful, that she could use as leverage, she would try to make a copy of.

For now, though, she was going to have a drink and maybe chat to Much a little and unwind before going back to Malcolm’s place. It was still early enough that the place wasn’t full, which she was glad about because it gave her a moment to speak to Much before he got dragged away by customers.

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	lockbreaker 2020-08-31 03:03 am UTC (link)
	"Ares is stubborn and determined and doesn't let anything stop him," Erica said, considering those traits. "Perhaps you have some of that after all." Sipping her drink, she turned her attention to the Merry Man who'd turned out to be a very good bartender - although he also seemed to spend most of his pay on giving people free drinks. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

muchofamuchness
2020-08-31 04:18 am UTC (link)

"Ahh..." Much tapped his thumb rapidly on the bar as he spoke, wondering if what he was opening here was a can of worms. But his mouth was already moving, so too late to stop anything now. "No, not reeeally, heh. But I'm not a big name so, I kinda... Change, a bit. Some of the guys are just, always who they are, but I still surprise myself. Came back from the dead in May and I'm like, oh is this who I am now? Right-ho."

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born_greater
2020-08-31 11:25 am UTC (link)

Oh right. Much had been killed by the Sheriff. Marcie dropped her gaze, feeling a little something like guilt, even though she had had nothing to do with it. Her being with Malcolm was enough of a painful reminder for him.

But then, he'd killed Malcolm too. Was this why she didn't feel a repulsion to that information? She felt like she should be disgusted, like it was a slight on Much's character, but she just... didn't care that much. Immortals weren't humans, they worked by different rules. She cared more about how it had affected her than anything.

"Do you like who you are? Or you just don't remember being anything else?" she asked, taking the glass and sipping from it.

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muchofamuchness
2020-08-31 12:15 pm UTC (link)

"No, I remember," Much said, with a shrug because... because he couldn't help shrugging, when it came to this stuff. The hard stuff to talk about. Shrug, and it didn't matter as much. "I remember all the bits of who I used to be, I'm just not them anymore." Another shrug. "Cores the same, though. Me and the guys. The whole balance-out-the-world mission. That doesn't change. I'm always part of that. And yeah, I like who I am. Imagine a lifetime where I didn't like myself, fuck!" Much laughed, though it wasn't really all that funny. There'd definitely been versions of himself he was glad he'd shed.

Like the page-boy killer. Or the simpleton.

Much had to wonder if, in his next like, he'd be glad to leave the sudden flares of rage behind, the impulsiveness, the low but constant murmur of dissatisfaction, the creeping dread that he just wasn't enough.

Yeah, not really all that funny.

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born_greater
2020-09-01 10:57 am UTC (link)

The corner of Marcie's lip pulled up, but it wasn't really mirthful. Yes, just imagine not liking yourself. She looked back at Erica, and sipped her drink.

"Thank you for telling me all of this," she said. "You've answered some questions I didn't have the words to ask yet. I'll probably be puzzling this out for a while to come." She paused a moment. "This might be personal, but, you and Hermes, do you still have a good relationship?"

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lockbreaker
2020-09-01 11:33 am UTC (link)

It was personal, but it also seemed to encompass an important aspect of the gods she she understand from the beginning. "Hermes and I have a... sometimes strained relationship," she finally settled on. "I love my father, but-He - and the other Olympians - they were worshiped and praised and sacrificed to for a thousand years. They were all-powerful and they did not compromise or change for mortals. And though the world has changed, their ways of thinking are harder to shift. Like I said, they're not really capable of change."

Talking about Hermes like this made Erica want to drink a little more, and she drained her glass before putting it back down.

"So while I know that my father loves me, I also know that he's capable of terrible things that he doesn't even see as terrible, no matter how it's explained to him. In the minds of Olympians, they're still what they were and I can try - and have I ever tried - to gently nudge him into this century, but it's hard work. Normal human adults are stubborn enough in their ways (I have a human mother-in-law who could barely be convinced to stop calling me Oriental), so just imagine when you add two thousand years onto it."

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muchofamuchness
2020-09-02 10:03 am UTC (link)

"You'd think after two thousands years of not being worshiped so much they'd've started to click 'bout what century we're in," said Much, the words slipping out because he was never very good at guarding his tongue, and besides, what he was really holding back was worse.

Or maybe not worse but... not the sort of thing you should ask your boss in the middle of your shift.

What he'd really wanted, but had been trying not to ask, was How the hell can you love someone who you know does terrible things?

Did she know about Luna?

How the fuck did you learn to accept that sort of shit? And still love someone? It made Much feel a little crazy, just thinking about it, like if he tried to think that way he'd be torn in half.

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born_greater
2020-09-02 10:31 am UTC (link)

Marcie glanced at Much, a slight frown tugging at her brows for a moment. He just wasn't good at hiding his feelings, and his disgust was obvious.

"Don't hold the gods in high esteem, huh? Humans are definitely capable of doing shitty things too," she said, thinking of her mother. She knew she loved her, but she'd deceived her, to assuage her own guilt. Marcie still couldn't forgive that. And her blood father incapable of change- so was there any point to trying again there? Probably not. And yet, the hope was not gone. Maybe call it stubbornness. She just had to find a different approach.

She took a big mouthful of her drink. "It's a lot to think about."

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muchofamuchness
2020-09-02 11:07 am UTC (link)

"They just... shouldn't get away with stuff just because they were worshiped once," Much said, with another shrug, although it was a shrug he regretted after he'd made it. He'd meant what he said, he shouldn't have undercut it with the gesture. "People shouldn't get away with doing shitty things either," he added, with a bit of a wry smile toward Marcie. "Not arguing that."

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lockbreaker
2020-09-03 10:13 am UTC (link)

"Aren't you old enough yet to know that 'shouldn't' is a meaningless word?" Erica asked him, not entirely congenially. Sometimes she felt so much older than these immortals, who were built of nothing but what people like herself could think of them. They all had such narrow world views. In some ways, Much and Hermes were the same. He might be changeable with each death, but that didn't mean he got to change for himself.

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muchofamuchness
2020-09-03 12:18 pm UTC (link)

"I hope not," Much said, in a similar tone, a harder tone than he'd ever used at work before (...aside from the night the Sheriff walked in.) The day he stopped thinking that way might as well be the day he died for real.

Maybe that was a bit heavy for workplace conversation, though.

"You want another one?" he asked Erica, noticing how quickly she was drowning her drink.

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lockbreaker
2020-09-03 12:26 pm UTC (link)

Erica nodded with a slight sigh and held up her glass to him, "thank you."

She turned back to Marcie and then slid a napkin across to herself. With the pen she pulled out of her pocket - she always carried a pen - she wrote down Erica Lowsley and her phone number. "You should have this," she said as she slide it back across the table. "Being the child of a god, it puts a target on you. It makes you visible and open and easy for everything dark and dangerous in this world. I had a father who protected me many times from the rest of them, but you are going to need people too." Her smile was sympathetic. "Don't expect it to be Ares. Protection is not in his nature. But Athena seemed to be concerned about you, and she's excellent to have in your corner."

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	born_greater 2020-09-03 01:20 pm UTC (link)
	Marcie took the napkin gratefully. "I appreciate it, I really do. Thank you." She folded it and carefully tucked it into her handbag. "And yes, I was hoping Athena might help me. I might be in the job market soon." She glanced at Much, waiting for the significance of that to strike. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	muchofamuchness 2020-09-03 02:03 pm UTC (link)
	Much had started slicing up a few more lemons when Marcie's words hit, and he raised his eyes to look at her, both lips pulled into his mouth for a moment before a bright smile broke out over his face. He didn't want to say anything, but he was fucking thrilled. And relieved. So relieved. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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