Jesse (jdelacroix) wrote in nevermore_logs, @ 2015-03-23 01:41:00 |
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Current mood: | hungry |
Entry tags: | jesse delacroix, lena rainmayr |
Who: Jesse Delacroix, open to Lena
What: Welcome to nope-town, population: Jesse
When: Sunday night
Where: Around the city, Central Park
Warnings: IDK
Generally speaking, Jesse was pretty capable of handling bad news. Years ago, especially just after being thrown out, sometimes it had seemed like that was the only news he got. And he'd learned pretty quickly that you could either let it beat you down, or you could fight back and let it make you stronger. So he'd let all the hits he'd taken just stoke the fire inside him, using all of that to scratch and claw his way into a better life.
Coming to New York had been a good start. Dating JJ, then reconnecting with Nicholas, then moving in with both of them-all of that was even better. Sure, it wasn't perfect, but really, what was? And, as if the universe was finally on his side, he'd gotten Jay back too.
Of course, the universe giveth...and the universe taketh away. Jay's past problems had started to come out, and then his eating disorder. He'd made himself very ill. He'd been taken. And then the bombshell that Adrian had dropped on him...it had all finally become too much. Jesse was a strong person, he'd had to become one very quickly. As he liked to say, 'Takes a lickin', keeps on tickin'. But he was still only human, and everyone has a breaking point. And that afternoon in the kitchen, he'd finally reached his.
He left a note for Nicholas and JJ, explaining that he needed a couple of hours to clear his head, that he wouldn't be gone more than a day, and that he'd have his phone. He refused to think of it as running away, but he desperately needed some time away from the house, away from the memories, away from the guilt and the apprehension that kept him awake at night. So he slid himself into the seat of his bike, roaring out of the garage and away from the house.
The breeze against his face felt good, and he ended up taking a long, circular route around the city, turning when he felt like it, and even doubling back sometimes. He eventually wound up in Central Park, because even though it was well known and very popular with tourists, he'd lived in the city long enough to find places that most people rarely visited. It was late enough in the afternoon that a lot of people had already gone home, and that was even better for him. He coasted in on a little-known pathway, leaning the bike against a tree and settling down beneath it.
He stayed there for a while and watched the sky gradually darken, and the stars start to appear. It was peaceful, being alone with only the stars and the wind for company. He knew it couldn't last forever, but sometimes you just needed to take a step back and breathe deeply.
'The deep breath before the plunge,' his mind supplied, and he snorted faintly, even though no one was around to get the joke. He thought briefly about pulling out his phone to check if anyone was looking for him, but discarded the idea. After all, he'd come to get some peace; he was sure he'd get around to checking it eventually.