I have plans for tonight. Do Uncle Elijah and Auntie Bex have any objections to babysitting for me?

[Yoda]
Hey, how're you? Feels like it's been ages since we've actually talked/hung out. We should fix that or something.

Do you girls want some ice cream?

So can we all agree the Nemeton is to blame for this mess? Because it will save a lot of trouble if you ask me.

What does this mean? Surprise, Beacon Hills! As is quite obvious, children. Children everywhere. Hope you don't mind the sudden families because, well... you guys know how the stupid stump works better than we do.

I'm Andrea Marshall, and this has been your friendly service announcement.

[Mom]
Hope says she got in touch with you. Sorry about this.

Question though. Where do we go? I mean... are you at [address to home in the future] or are you still living with Aunt Bex and Uncle Elijah?

Elijah, you stifle me. You don't have to helicopter hover over me, okay? I'm fine. I can handle myself. And I think I feelings for you but I don't really know it's weird and complicated and I just don't know where to go with that.

Derek, you're being a dick right now and it is is seriously awkward that you don't remember being here before because we were dating. Kind of. I don't know, it was weird and undefined and I'm not sure if it was relly dating or not but I liked it.

And that just makes it all 1000% more complicated and weird and stupid, like it wasn't already fucked up enough considering I'm carrying Andrea The Miracle Baby.

OMG I don't know why I needed to tell you guys that but yeah.

I blame myself for Klaus turning into the monster he is today. I couldn't protect him as a child. It's my fault.

Whatever, I'm getting drunk.

Niklaus is gone. I cannot reach him anywhere. Thankfully Hope is still here

It would seem that the criminals of Beacon Hills are both increasingly stupid and unlucky, particularly so today.

That is the first time I've been stabbed while shopping.

[Mikaelsons + Hayley]

Congratulations on celebrating your first Fathers Day, brother.

Can I stop being pregnant now? I'm over it. I just want this kid outta me. And there's still like 10 weeks left wtf.

Attention assholes of Beacon Hills: Keep your dicks in your pants and away from my sister. I'll break your arm otherwise.

Bonnie said the hunters are coming after you Kol. All because you tried to kill Elena Gilbert. Again. I can't say I entirely blame you, but we have enough on our plate already.

I will do what I can to throw their attention off of you. All of you need to ensure that Hayley, the baby inside of her, and Hope remain safe. I'll do what I can to draw their attention onto me if need be.

I have something that I must confess. I've arrived through the Nemeton again. But I wasn't alone. This time, I came with my daughter.

Her name is Hope.

You know what sucks about this place, besides being in one place for so long, which, seriously, never getting used to that.

My car.

I miss my car.

Sammy, why couldn't you have been with her when you showed up here?

Thank God I no longer have a tail. I found that to be quite obnoxious, but I don't regret splashing you Kol and Rebekah. You had it coming to you.

I may have a fish tail, but I still need food. Like blood Can somebody actually help with that?

OMG what is happening to me...this can't be real.

[Klaus]

I need you. Right now.

I'm going...out. Or...something. I don't know. I was a fool to think he cared.

[Malia]
What are you up to, love?

Well, this sure isn't New Orleans.