InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Say it."

"Uh, Coach?" Amir said, hesitating at the open door of the conference room Bart had taken over for an office. His hand was up and ready to knock on the door, but instead he lingered, uncertainty in his voice.

He wasn't the sort who really wanted to stand out, but while the note on the board announcing Coach MacFusty's return had certainly been the prime topic of conversation in the locker room before and after practice, no one seemed to have a clear view of what that meant. And it had said to see Coach Roberts with any questions.

Amir had questions, but he wasn't certain he even knew what to ask. This season had been a whirlwind of him starting in the office before landing a spot on the team, watching teammates come and go and now the coaches had joined that mix.

Really, all he wanted to do was improve as a player and not get kicked off the team. But he was stressing himself out enough trying to prove himself and maybe Coach Roberts could at least explain what that memo meant so he didn't have to worry about that as well.

"Got a moment?" he asked.

"Sure, Amir," Bart said and gestured him into the conference room. "Grab a chair and tell me what's on your mind."

Nodding, Amir entered the makeshift office and took a seat. It was still slightly odd to him, being on the other side of things, and he had definitely been more comfortable on the administrative side. He gave up on trying to find a better way to word his question and just asked what had been on his mind, as directed, "So are you still coaching us on Monday? Or... "

He really had no bloody clue what was going on with the team.

Bart waited until Amir sat down to take his own chair, which wasn't so much across the desk from Amir, as it were, as around the side of the table. He pulled it further around as he readied it so they were a little closer together, and closed the door with his wand.

"Coach MacFusty is coming back from an injury that was aggravated in the first half of the season. A bludger injury. So I think part of what's going to happen on the twenty-second is we're going to all find out--including Coach MacFusty--how much she can do and how much I need to do. So," Bart confessed, "the honest answer is that I don't know either. If nothing else, I'll be here to mentor her; if she needs more assistance, I'll take on offence or defence coaching, or special cases. Maybe I'll work with you personally some. I know that's not a clear answer but it's the one I have right now."

"So you're not leaving then?" Amir asked, looking to confirm that fact, even as he relaxed slightly. And he certainly didn't mind the idea of working one-on-one. All he wanted to do was improve, but consistency within the team would be nice.

"This season's been…" A giant game of musical chairs, really. Keke had been right about that. "Ever evolving?" That sounded better.

"No plans to leave at this point. I expect to be here through the end of the season." It hadn't occurred to Bart that it might be in question, but possibly that was because he'd talked to Graham, and Kirsten. "My wife would hex my sorry arse if I wrecked our plans for this spring and then didn't even coach for more than a week. So the situation is--yes, evolving. That's a good word. What else can I help you with? How are you finding moving from admin side to playing reserve?"

Amir had to laugh at that. "Yeah, you don't want to get in trouble," he agreed. "That's good though. You and Coach MacFusty sorta balance each other out."

Considering Bart's question, he frowned slightly. "I like this side better but it's been stressful. Until recently, at least. Ainsley's been working with me and Keke's here now so that's helped." Especially not having to jump right in and start earlier than he should. "And there's less paperwork."

Definitely a bonus.

Bart snorted, not entirely suppressing a grin at that last. He was pleased to hear that Ainsley's mentoring was having a good effect on Amir's stress level if nothing else, and that Keke was already working on becoming a team player. Bart believed in some controlled chaos, but it really needed to be aimed at the other side of the pitch, not at your teammates. "What's been stressful for you?" he prodded, hoping that Amir would take it better than Scrimmy had.

"Well I kept trying out and I finally made the team, and I was just starting to feel like I had proven myself to Coach MacFusty and then she was gone and you were here and so it was like starting over?" Amir offered. "And with all the Beaters that have come and gone it's hard not to feel like even as a reserve this is only temporary? Which I guess is part of the game that I'll have to get used to but I hadn't really played since school and even though I trained and practiced to make the team, there's nothing that compares to playing and everyone is so much better than me but with Keke here I feel like I might have more time to get on that level?"

Apparently everything concerning Amir had been waiting to spill out, as the words tumbled into the air, exposed. "And it's been hard to get feedback on how I've been doing because it's almost always someone new around, judging me."

He shrugged. "On the bright side, there's been a lot of people to learn from."

That was quite a bit from Amir, but Bart wasn't really surprised. Amir had enough experience behind the scenes that he was aware of exactly how easy it was for players to come and go, and with Portree this season there had been a lot of going. Plus he was the least experienced of the reserves and didn't have the Urquhart name to give him extra confidence of his place.

"That's all reasonable," was the first thing Bart had to say. "You've got a different view to most of the players because of where you come from. It can be something of a weakness at this point in your career because you have less pitch time than the others, but that knowledge will serve you well in your longer term career. I'll be upfront: you're not ready for Ballycastle and I'm relieved we don't have to throw you in the deep end arse first. We're going to have to bust your arse to get you ready by March but you have to be ready by then, because there are going to be too many matches for me not to play you.

"I'm judging you based on what I see and my experience as player and coach, and I'm keeping an eye on you, Amir. I want you to succeed and I'm glad you're ready to work for it. Because I don't want any more changes. I want to keep Lorna and Keke and you through the end of the season and barring injury--" Bart rapped twice sharply on the conference room table "--that's what will happen."

It didn't even phase him when the coach said he wasn't ready for Ballycastle. Amir knew that already, and having someone he actually knew and respected come in and take the starting job had been brilliant. But then when Bart said his goal was to have him ready to play by March, Amir grinned, his relief almost palpable.

"I'll be ready," he promised. "Whatever I need to do to get there, I will."

"Good, because you're going to be working hard every day until then to get there. And when you get into that match and we win it, you're going to be a part of that. You're going to have earned it, Amir." That, too, was a promise that Bart meant to keep.