Agent Fox Mulder (i_want_2) wrote in multi_fiction, @ 2008-11-27 19:47:00 |
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Entry tags: | house, rated: teen, slash |
Fic: A Little Of This 1/1 House M.D.
Title: A Little Of This
Author: Lopaka Tanu
Disclaimer: I do not own House MD.
Characters: House, Foreman, Cuddy, Chase, Thirteen, Kutner
Words: 1971
Prompt: For water333
Fandom: House MD
Pairing: House/Chase
Rating: Teen
Warnings: Language, Innuendo
Summary: House gets a new employee.
Author's Note: Not sure this quite meets what she wanted, but here it is.
______________________________________
"Good news, everyone! I have decided that one of you will be fired." Just as he knew it would, Diagnostics suddenly went quiet. Tossing his ball up in the air, House watched it spin, red over black. "Not from that really cool cannon they use in the circus, but in that 'oh no, someone just ran over my job' kinda way!"
Focusing at the folder in front of her, Thirteen fought the urge to look up. Just in case it was a ruse, there was no need to play in to his game. "Oh?"
"Yep. Time's come to do the right thing and hire someone who actually knows what they're doing." Catching the ball, House fumbled it between his hands for a bit. "If you want a reason for my sudden change of heart, blame Cuddy. She's the Scrooge with her claws around the money bag."
"Leave her out of this. You have never backed down from pressure before. So, if you are going to fire someone, it's all on you." Holding the cup to his lips, Foreman took a long sip. He grimaced at the bitter after flavor, then glanced over the three whose jobs weren't secure. "Which one's it going to be?"
"Don't suppose you'd believe me if I said you?" At the other doctor's snort, House heaved a great sigh. He put extra effort in to it, seeming to deflate in his chair. "Ever since I spoiled that Santa Clause was in fact Wilson, you've never believed me."
"Just get on with it, we've been assigned a new patient." Given the other man's reaction, Foreman knew the distraction wasn't enough this time. If there was something they didn't need, it was a bored House. Deciding it was best not to get caught in the crossfire, he decided there were really patients that needed checking on.
Kutner and Taub watched him leave, feeling their hopes sink.
Grinning to himself, House set his ball on the table and turned to face the remaining three doctors. A small thrill of excitement went through him at their expressions. "Since none of you alone is good enough to stand out from the pack, we're going to have to skip the talent portion and get right down to the swim suits."
Now staring at House, Thirteen felt her left eye twitch. This was certainly not what she had been expecting for her last day. "Is this sexual harassment?"
"You're right, Kutner has an unfair advantage since he can fill out his bikini better than you. Let's see." Putting a finger to his chin, he tapped it against his lips. "I can't judge you upon number of lives saved, since, technically, once again, Kutner's got a leg up on the two of you."
Sitting up a little straighter, Kutner felt a little ray of hope. Could he actually survive this process?
"I know! You three stand against the far wall." House pointed to the glass wall behind the conference table. "I'll put on my blindfold and get out some darts. The one I don't hit is eliminated."
"For god's sake, House!"
All four heads swiveled to the door.
Standing just inside the doorway, leaning enough that her chest stuck out, Dr. Cuddy glared at him. "Just pick one already!"
"Fine. Taub and Thirteen." House waited until they were smiling at him. "There's hot and both of you are so not. Pack your crap, Kutner's my new BFF." Standing up, he snatched his ball off the table. As he turned to head in to his office, he stuck his tongue out at Cuddy.
Closing her eyes, she sighed. "This is not what we agreed upon."
This drew him up short. Stopping in front of her, House put a hand to his ear. "I don't hear Kutner complaining." Hearing her sigh again, he shrugged.
"House." Opening her eyes, she tried to reason with her expression. That failed as did her raised eyebrow. There was no backing down on this one with him. "One, we agreed on one for one."
"You agreed on one. I said I would chop away the dead weight." Swinging one arm, he pointed at Taub and Thirteen. "There. Gone. Now, use your magical 'Boobs of Might' and finish your side of the deal."
Exhaling through her nose, she stepped back. Cuddy let the door close, still watching House through the glass. Raising her hand, she held up one finger.
House returned the gesture with a different finger. Waving it, he smiled.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"They were all idiots!" Picking up his fork, he stabbed the green mass in the center of his plate as if that would drive away the unappetizing appearance.
Snorting, he spun his own fork. "The pool closed early, again. People are upset."
"What do I care what they think? So long as they keep putting in their money." His attention focused solely on his plate, House missed his companion's smirk. "I say we have two more before they start to catch on."
"You're off. Brenda's already caught on." Setting down his fork, he picked up his napkin and dabbed at his lips. "She shook me down for twenty percent."
"Evil woman, I told Cuddy to fire her." With another jab, he quickly disemboweled the borrito to the left of the green stuff. Watching the chili sauce leak from it down the plate, he smiled. "How much does she want for the next pool?"
"Thirty-three percent."
"That's extortion." House finally looked up across the table to his companion. "She must be stopped."
"I suppose you've got an idea how." His eyes almost twinkled as he leaned forward. Raising his right hand, he wiped at the corner of House's mouth. "You have a little something there."
"Oh, don't even." Pulling back, House glared. "I'm not falling for that one. If you want kissing, it'll cost you extra."
"I've got a new job, I can afford it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Good morning, class, I hope you did your assignments last night." Limping in to the conference room, he found Kutner and Foreman looking over a set of files. Apparently they really did have a patient this time. "Who's the lucky stiff?"
Shifting his attention from his file, Foreman stared House. He started to say something, then he caught sight of who was behind House, and stopped. Raising an eyebrow, he stared at the man in question.
Noticing his reaction, House glanced over his shoulder. "What, do I have something behind me?" Craning his neck, he searched around the man. "I don't see anything."
"What's Doctor Chase doing here?" Having just noticed the man, Kutner felt a little confused. This was not something he needed to form a habit of.
"Dr. Chase?" House stretched his neck again. Leaning on his cane, he grabbed Chase by the shoulder and moved him to the side. "Stand aside, wombat, there is a Doctor some where around here."
"Very funny." Chase pushed passed House. He walked over to the table, ignoring the curious expressions on Kutner and Foreman's faces. Raising the strap on his bag over his head, he set it on the table. "What's our patient's symptoms?"
"Our patient?" Foreman took a deep breath. Exhaling through his nose, he glared at House. "Is this what your little charade was about yesterday?"
"No." House raised his eyes to the ceiling, squinting. "Well, may be. But, I was going to fire them anyways. Thirteen wouldn't put out. Taub was just really ugly and didn't match the decor at all." He limped over to stand adjacent to Chase. "What symptoms is our patient presenting?"
There was nothing but silence as Kutner and Foreman stared at him as if he had lost his mind.
Sighing, House snapped his fingers. "Patient. Person dying. What are his symptoms?"
"The patient is a woman." Reaching in to the stack of folders beneath his, Foreman pulled out a copy of the Patient's records for House. Holding them up, he shifted his attention to Chase. "I thought you were happy where you were."
"I changed his mind." House flipped the file open. Scanning the top sheet, he found nothing of interest. He began to scan the next paper, then frowned. "With Thirteen gone, I had to have something pretty to look at. Check to see if the machine's clear, I want an MRI." He slapped the file against Chase's chest, cutting off a retort. "Of the patient."
"Very well." Accepting the file, Chase shook his head. Same old shit. "Anything else, oh mighty, House?"
"Yes, I am issuing you a new dress code. I want to be able to see that tattoo of my name you have on your left butt cheek." Smacking Chase on the ass, House wiggled his eyebrows.
Chase snorted. "All right, but you'll have to wear the dog collar and leash."
"Hey, I'm the one who calls the shots around here." House whacked him again. He quickly sobered up. "I don't care who you have to bump, get that scan."
Nodding, Chase glanced over at Kutner. "Dr. Kutner, I could use your help." Seeing the man physically sigh with relief, Chase snorted. This was going to be hell for them all, best to make allies now. With a nod of acknowledgment to House, Chase turned and headed back for the door. He waited until he heard Kutner stand up before he walked out.
Foreman lasted until they were out the door before he turned on House. "You're sleeping with Chase?" Standing up, he tossed the file aside.
"Sleeping implies we made it to the bed. Of all the places, that's the one we haven't quite christened." House grinned. Now was the fun part. He had been waiting to do this for two weeks.
Straightening his suit, Foreman notched up his glare. "Is that why you hired him back?"
"Would I do that?" House held up a hand. "Scratch that. I would and I have, but not this time. Since I kicked him out of the nest, Chase has proven he's confident, competent, and mature enough to stand on his own."
"And that bothers you." He knew it.
"On the contrary, I find it quite erotic." Glancing about, House made a show of checking for possible eavesdroppers. House leaned towards Foreman. Putting a hand to his mouth, he blocked it off from sight. "Confidentially, it makes tying him up and breaking him in so much more fun."
"You're unbelievable." Grimacing, Foreman took a step back. "Does Cuddy know of this?"
"Know? She pays to watch. Who do you think suggested it?" Having had his fun, House waved it off. If things went any further, he might actually have Foreman investigating things. With the new pool, that was the last thing he needed. "What I said yesterday was true, it was past time to get someone competent. Since he is the best of my former employees, Chase made the prime candidate. The fact I am sleeping with him is incidental."
That Foreman could believe. If there wasn't an interest factor, then nothing but cold, hard logic where House was concerned. "What about Cameron? Weren't she and Chase an item?"
"Were. Not now. Don't care any more." Shrugging, House put more weight on his cane. "Get the most recent blood work on our patient, I have an idea."
"All right." Foreman didn't believe him for a second. There was something else the other man was hiding. Even if it took him all day, he would figure it out.
Watching him, House couldn't keep the little smile of challenge off his face. Let the man try. So long as he was busy trying to figure out what angle House was playing, he would never think to look at the pool.
Besides, things had gotten too boring around there anyways. A little sexual tension and misunderstanding was just what the doctor ordered.
THE END