His cheeks heated up a little as well, but it was because he wasn't used to talking about his drive in life, and understood it was probably weird. Or, he knew it was. Other people didn't thrive off of chaos, didn't want to see what happened when everything hit a crazy factor of 11.
But, he opted to be honest with her about it, letting himself share his point of view. She was his friend. He sort of felt like she deserved to know. "Well, I guess, for me...I've always loved chaos. It's something that I think there needs to be more in the world. People, they get in these ruts and I hate seeing it. Like the're afraid to rock the boat, or move forward just because they don't know what's going to happen if they put a foot wrong. But the beauty of life is finding out how you deal with it when you put a foot wrong. Do you stumble? Bounce back? Just keep going like nothing happened? And with my bombs - they can't make anyone do anything. It's all down to the individual. I've set off rage bombs and seen people who still wouldn't hit anyone else, even if they've never been that angry in their lives. I've seen guys who would punch any dude in ten feet but if a girl got in there, even if she hit him, he still wouldn't raise a hand to her. I love seeing people, and how they react, see what they do with a pure drive, one that kills all the strangling choke holds they have on themselves," he said.
Absently, while he spoke, he drifted his fingers through her hair, twirling a lock of it around his finger then releasing it only to slowly draw it back. "I mean, don't get me wrong, it's...yeah. But for me there's all this other stuff too. I just love seeing people free because they've got one, clear, bright drive that they can't deny. And when it's all over, maybe they learn something. Maybe they get out of that relationship that isn't working, or they admit to someone that they love them because when they felt that all consuming passion, that was who they wanted. Maybe they get anger out in one shot, and feel better and make some changes in their life. Hell, maybe they realized what was making them angry in the first place, when they'd been in denial about it the whole time."
He was quiet a moment, then shrugged one shoulder. "I really love people. I just hate seeing them stagnate, and so many people do that to themselves."