girlorboy (girlorboy) wrote in midway_ic, @ 2011-09-04 15:42:00 |
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Entry tags: | luc wheeler, vlad smith, week 4 |
Delivery
Vlad had labored over the letter for hours, trying to produce a mistake proof copy that said what he wanted and that placed the blame squarely on his own shoulders. That done, he put it in an envelop and sealed it. Finding Luc was easy enough as Vlad went straight to the Medtent, waiting for Luc to be free then walked up and handed him the envelope. He didn't say a word or even really meet Luce's gaze as Luc took it, just turned and left the tent as quietly as he'd come.
Dr Wheeler,
I have spent quite some time, going over our last encounter in my mind and I feel that I owe you an apology. I worry that because I live in such paranoia of discovery I often tend to leap to conclusions that are perhaps, unlikely. When I saw your hands shaking, I assumed it was in shock at making a discovery instead of with fatigue over the energy you had expended on my behalf. I apologize for my quick and incorrect leap based not in fact but on faulty intuition that resulted in an action that violated your privacy.
This is not something I have practiced, as you can imagine it would be difficult even if I wished to practice, which I do not. The act of experiencing that kind of intimacy with another person can be somewhat confusing, intimidating and discomfiting for both parties. Although, prior to my experience with you, I have never had anyone that remained with that knowledge. It's left me entirely uncertain of how to proceed. I understand your anger and wish that I could do more, but I cannot.
At that moment, I had to make a choice. I could have chosen to remove the memory of everything. I could have chosen to say nothing and never let you suspect that I knew what had happened. Both of those seemed-dishonest in the face of how you had already kept my secrets and the care you had shown. I would rather face your anger than take an easier path and use the knowledge I gained from you in any way.
I know you must have questions and so, I put myself at your disposal whenever you wish to ask them. Again, I offer my mot sincere apologies for my rashness and the discomfort I have caused you.
Vlad