WHO: Joaco & Eli WHEN: February 14th WHERE: Beach SUMMARY: Eli makes Joaco take a day off CW: Teasing and some innuendos
Eli felt considerably lighter than he had been a week ago. He still felt silly – overdramatic even – especially since it made him understand how much he had left to learn about Joaco. But that was something to look forward to.
With an assist from Faihan, his mother had dragged him out of the grumpy mood and out of the closet officially. As expected, she fretted and then helped him somewhat with his plan after she convinced him to give it another try.
You’re not perfect, mijo she said. And the way you have been acting, I know you did the stupid thing and don't want to even admit it. Mothers were so annoying.
It had been nice to spend Sunday with his parents with at least one partially concealed secret exposed. It made up for the fact he couldn't even tell them about the Chosen of Fire/Dark Knight/Other World nonsense. His parents knew him so well they could tell he held secrets. This placated that urge.
Besides, he got his urge to know all the things from them, and he didn't want the dark knight to show up and do anything to them.
Eli wanted to pretend he didn't see the irony in this.
Things felt like it was in a better place, though.
After doing some scouting, he found an enclave on the beach that Joaco and he had walked. A trio of trees provided shade, and the waves washed up close but not too close, and it would not be high or low tide until way off hours. Eli drew a map using a sharpie to use for the gift left for Joaco at one of his work locations.
On the day of mid-afternoon, Eli set up a blue picnic blanket, a cooler filled with a bottle of red wine, water, and a few juices. He also had a different cooler filled with hamentashen he had tried to make that came out less than he expected. For the rest of the meal, he had help from his mother: Empanadillas, plantains, and turkey and cheese sandwiches. There were also a sundry other snacks.
Sondheim sat under one of the trees, a bowl nearby.
Eli sat on the blanket drinking a juice bottle, wearing a pair of jeans, a light purple tank top, and a worn open button-down short-sleeved shirt– plum in color. He had his phone nearby, but he did not have earbuds in.
He listened to the waves, learning to appreciate the silence.
There was something to be said about the cute treasure map he got when he arrived at his first job, his main job really, which was at his office in his father's business. He was also promptly informed by everyone that he had the day off, and with a quick sigh and some nudging from his mom, Joaco relented and returned home to change for a beach day. He was dressed in a fitting t-shirt and a pair of jeans that resembled his old outfits, and he was even carrying a duffel bag over his shoulder with some things in it like the good old times.
With a neatly packed gift box in one hand and the map in another hand, Joaco silently approached his destination. He tried to sneak up on Eli, but Sondheim betrayed him by barking happily. "Hey," he said, offering a shy little smile as he took a seat next to Eli, resting the box on his lap. "Maybe I should've prepared more for this day," Joaco let out a soft laugh.
At the sound of his voice, Eli felt his stomach flip. Things had been patched up on the boat between them. But Eli's relationship with himself still had some lingering cringe. He wouldn't let it ruin today, though. He put in a lot of hard work, and he would just enjoy the time they had today before Joaco would no doubt go back to running around doing all his jobs again. But even then, they could still make time. They had found it before.
He couldn't help but smile broadly as Joaco sat down beside him. Everything suddenly felt better. Dark Knight? What Dark Knight?
"That was kind of the idea," Eli teased. "I knew you needed a little nudge to really have the day off. I was to sit in silence, and you had to take a break, remember?" He leaned over to give Joaco a cheek kiss before the other man nodded his head. "I'm glad you came. Really. You didn't have to do anything but come here." He paused. "If you wanted." He ran his hand through his hair.
"Do you want some water? Juice? Wine? I got practically a whole fridge here. And also sandwiches and other stuff Mami helped me with…."
"Whatever you're having is fine–you're already being amazing by preparing this." And so, it was his turn to hold out the box with a bit of gift. "So, I uh… made you something. For old time's sake, I suppose."
Eli opened the cooler to pull out a small bottle of juice and tossed it to Joaco's way, who caught it with ease, "Here you go." He gave him a wink, "I wanted to give you something that the Bravos couldn't get you. I also just wanted to spend time with you. So, it wasn't entirely altruistic. I was going to do this and give you a job to put together a new bed or something, but then I thought that may be a little too silly and on the nose."
"I'm only putting together a bed if we're breaking it in." Joaco's heart was beating fast despite his teasing words and wink, and while he knew that it wasn't anywhere as good as anything he baked a life before, the cookies were only a bit dry and not burnt, and the mini tarts mostly came out alright.
As Eli opened up the box, he smiled, "Oh, thank you!" He grabbed one of the mini tarts and took a bite. He had a flash of a memory of Gaius bringing him tarts – like old times. They tasted different, though, "They're really good! I made some Hamentashen – outside the normal time of year to have them – using my grandmother's recipe. They look weird but taste fine. Mami's Empanadillas look a lot more skilled, but –."
He stopped because he realized he was rambling a little, and his heart also pounded. He thought of what Faihan said, really learning about Joaco. The little things, "What is your favorite sweet?"
He just hoped this didn't turn into 20 questions.
Joaco decided to scoot closer until his shoulder was pressed against Eli's. "Favorite, of all time? Mi Abuela's Tres Leches, but I like a lot of things," he smiled softly, moving a hand to rest on Eli, just wanting to touch him. "I like the flavor of passion fruit and grapes. I love purple and black, and you'll always catch me wearing jeans or shorts when I can." He understood the intention of Eli's question, so he decided to be the one to ramble this time around.
"You close to your abuela then? I'd like to try it sometime," Eli felt warm at Joaco's touch but less panicky than he may have before. That hearth Kyo spoke about. A happily crackling fire. "My abuela from Chile – my papa's mother – I didn't know super well before she passed, but she survived WWII, so that was something. My abuela from New York … well, she taught me how to knit because sometimes when she was watching me, I was dancing around, and she wanted me to sit down for a second. I haven't knitted in a while. Maybe I should go back to it."
Joaco listened silently, opening up his juice to take a sip as he watched Eli and nodded his head to the things he said. He was genuinely listening to him–he had always been a better listener than a talker, anyway.
"Passion fruit and grapes," Eli repeated so he'd remember. "I like strawberries. More tart flavors." Then the mention of purple and black, he nodded again. "You do look hot in those colors…." And he noted the plum shirt he had recently bought because Fernanda said he looked cute in it. She really was more observant than she led on. It must be a Bravo trait. Too bad it skipped with Alejo, in Eli's opinion. "I like red. Although red and I have a relationship pause. I've been going for a cool palette lately. And pastels."
"You've got to accept yourself, Lili," Joaco joked with a soft laugh and a squeeze of Eli's knee. "Besides, you look good in every color to me. Just like I look good in jeans and shorts." Eli gave Joaco a sideways glance at the nickname and hid a smile. It thrilled him, but he decided not to share that bit. Or the fact yes, he thought he looked good in most colors.
Eli laughed at Joaco, saying he would wear jeans and shorts whenever he could, "Ah, still Joaco from the block. I think that's good, though. And that is what I wanted to do here. I know, I know, I'm yeyesito and all that. I'm not… super-rich. But I'm a generation away from living in Taboga Town. Mami grew up working class. My Abuelo worked as a plumber. She grew up in a small apartment in NYC. And she just worked her ass off until she was successful enough to get jobs in Geneva. But like when we moved back, she had my abuela babysit me so I could know that is where I came from. And well, it was nice being around my cousins and stuff. I went through a period like 12 or 13 in which I acted too good for it, but abuela squashed that real quick. And papa, well, he is the child of refugees. He got where he is because he loves his job. He would still do it for pennies. But-."
He paused, looking over at Joaco, wondering if this bore him, but Joaco's eyes were trained on him as he spoke. In a way, it was an excellent way to revisit the origin of Eli, "I guess I'm telling you this because I don't want you to think you have to wear the Bravo costume for me. Wear those jeans and shorts. Or nothing at all. When appropriate, of course." He winked as he popped another cookie in his mouth.
"We'll get to that someday, but not soon enough," Joaco wagged his eyebrows as he took another sip of his juice. Eli stole another kiss as if it were a promise.
"I'm glad you liked the tarts, though… I'll have to ask Badr–Faihan how to do it in this world, though." It was amazing how the little things were so different, even the flour, regardless of how similar the worlds were. "Anyway… I'm excited to eat bad guy ears."
He reached over to open up the non-drink cooler to pull out the tupperware that had his failed experiment. Then he scooted back close to Joaco, "Bad guy ears at your service." He paused for a second, "Wait, you remember the recipe from… back then?"
"Thank you kindly, guapo," Joaco reached over before biting into the baked good, humming simply in reply, but after he swallowed, he said, "yeah, of course, I do. Why?"
"It is such a specific detail to remember," Eli shrugged, and Joaco did too in response. "Not that I'm complaining. Clearly, I still like tarts. Nothing has changed on that front." He paused. "I wish I could remember more than I do. But at the same time, I'm a little fearful." He shook his head. "Sorry, I know you don't want to talk about that time." Joaco looked like he was about to say something, but he chose to stay quiet.
After a moment, Eli asked, "What is your grandmother like? I imagine the Tres Leches tastes like love."
"A strong woman who is full of love, yeah," Joaco smiled to himself as he watched the waves, feeling the sea breeze against his skin. This, this felt like home, and he had missed it so much that his eyes got a bit misty. "I'll let her know you want to taste it, hers, not the one at the restaurant, even if it's her recipe." He reached over for Eli's hand, lacing their fingers together.
Eli gave Joaco's hand a squeeze, "I'd love that. Maybe one day you can come over to dinner and meet my parents. Both my parents are good enough cooks. I also told them about you." He took a deep breath. "I came out to them this weekend, and while I couldn't tell them all my secrets, it was nice to hear confirmed that they love me and are always here. I'm so lucky to have them."
"You are, and I'm glad you got to grow up full of love this time, Eli." Joaco let out a soft and shy chuckle, one that resembled more who he was than what he is now. "Maybe when I feel like I'm worthy of meeting them, I'll take you up on that offer." Joaco grew quiet, casting his gaze away from the other man. Eli tilted his head to the side. Before he could protest about Joaco's worthiness, Joaco continued. And he closed his mouth.
"I'm sorry, I've been unfair to you," he spoke softly, avoiding Eli's pretty eyes, focusing his gaze on the horizon. "I've been asking you to ignore our past–what we were out of my own selfishness. I shouldn't–" Joaco took in a deep breath, ducking his head. "Gaius and Kyo, they were us–in the past, sure, but still us. Telling you to act like that never happened isn't fair."
Eli stopped as Joaco apologized; he looked over at him, "It's hard to ignore. The more I ignore it, the harder it is to control that aspect of myself. But–." He paused as he tried to lean over to make eye contact with Joaco, "I think I get it why you didn't. I went through phases of thinking I was going crazy. Trying to ignore it. Then I was like, hey, I'm like a superhero; this is kind of neat to realize I was this distraught young prince who struggled with a lot. And granted, you like to … ocean away; sometimes, I understand why you did. I wish I could ignore it too. But I accept your apology."
He paused, rubbing his index finger gently over Joaco's, "We have a past – I still don't know a lot of what that past entailed, but we were revolutionaries. And if Les Miserables taught me anything – unless we were a cute hetero couple – it doesn't end well." He paused, smirking at his own joke, then he continued, "And a lot has changed. And I want to see what happens now. I just… I'm happy I found you again."
Joaco chuckled softly, smiling at Eli's cute nerdy words despite their somber content, but he wasn't looking back at him, still avoiding his gaze. It took him a moment longer of silence and squeezing Eli's hand before he finally looked over at him, his dark eyes meeting Eli's pretty green ones.
"I remember everything," he said simply, softly, hoping Eli wouldn't hate him for that.
Eli didn't say anything at first. His eyes grew a little watery but more because he recognized how hard this must have been for Joaco – much harder than Eli admitting he had been stupid. But he also exhaled with relief because it had been one of his many questions. And his suspicions had been confirmed.
"I thought you did," Eli nodded somberly. "Alejandro said he remembered, and since your destinies seemed so intertwined, I had my suspicions. You also said you always knew you were Gaius. And yet you hid it." He shook his head. "I… trust you kept it close because you didn't want people to be upset whether it is about their fates or yours." He shook his head again a bit more fiercely.
Joaco let out a deep breath, and once again, simply nodded his head.
"Are you going to tell me what happened? Are you able to?" Eli asked as he squeezed Joaco's hand tightly.
As much as he wanted to know, he added, "If you want to wait for another day, we can."
"It's better if I don't," Joaco took Eli's hand and brought it to his lips to kiss it. "The less you know, the happier and safer you are." That was why he got so upset about it–asking questions only put Eli and everyone else in danger.
He looked down, and with his free hand, he lightly touched over his chest and underneath his shirt. "But I know I don't deserve your trust if I don't return it, so… I will tell you something else–later today, much later." Joaco leaned over to press his lips against Eli's. "For the rest of the day, I just selfishly want to be your boyfriend."
Eli felt like he landed at square one again but, at the same time, didn't feel as frustrated – still mildly annoyed that Joaco wouldn't tell him – but keenly aware this had been extremely hard for Joaco to admit. To push more wouldn't yield much juice.
Besides, Joaco was being incredibly sweet and open and vulnerable. And Eli found it extremely adorable. Even if the whole situation had this tinge of sadness.
As he promised Eli with trust in the form of a promise for more secrets, he thought he never felt closer to Joaco or anyone. Their fight reminded him of Kyo mentioning how Guren conducted controlled burning to refertilize the soil. Everything had been reset – for a brief time. Eli always got that feeling with how Joaco presented it.
He gave a sharp inhale at Joaco's touch against his skin. He couldn't even think of a witty response, "Okay."
A slight smile played at his lips right before Joaco kissed him. He returned it adjusted how he sat to become more accessible. His free hand rested on Joaco's hip.
"I want to be your boyfriend too."
"Should've asked earlier," Joaco joked, but he shifted, pulling one from Alejo's book after putting the baked goods box away and pulling Eli to sit on his lap. He wrapped his arms around his middle, resting his chin on his shoulder. "I always wanted to hold you like this where anyone can see," he confessed, nudging the tip of his nose behind Eli's ear.
"Because I'm not ashamed of us, not in this life or any life."
Eli laughed a little as he allowed Joaco to move him into his lap. This felt very close, and he could not help but feel his heart speed up and his cheeks pink. It took him a couple of seconds to adjust but once done, he wrapped his arms around completely, running his nails gently down Joaco's back.
His boyfriend's words hit him harder than he expected. The Kyo part of him, no doubt. He longed for this too – to show him off both as Gaius and as Joaco. He took another sharp intake gasp.
"Me too. Me too," he replied quietly, his voice shaking slightly. "Can I hold you forever?" He closed his eyes, taking in the closeness, taking in Joaco's feelings and smells. "Where we have nothing to fear."
"You would get sore holding on for so long," Joaco replied in his usual joking tone, but it was genuinely relaxed now, tracing gentle circles on the small of Eli's back. "This moment will be our forever," he decided, pulling back to look at Eli in the eye before he leaned in to kiss him, full of affection and warmth.
Eli laughed at Joaco's joke, giving him a nuzzle. Their forever moment. He gripped the fabric of Joaco's shirt as if he would leave him again, only letting go when his boyfriend kissed him, which he returned with his own.
The sound of the waves echoed in the background, and the only thing Joaco wanted to do for the rest of the day was to lie with Eli in his arms. "If I could give you anything you wanted, what would you ask for?"
Eli enjoyed the silence, and the thoughts became less and less. Then Joaco asked him that question. He raised an eyebrow, "Something tangible like money or…" he made the joke. Then he looked over at Joaco. "I just want to be with you. I guess if you could get rid of all those characters after us. But mostly, you don't have to give me much."
"Well, I want to remind you that I am now a billionaire," Joaco joked with a soft laugh and an arched eyebrow right back at Eli. At his actual request, Joaco softened, reaching up to touch Eli's cheek and caress it. "I swear I'll protect you," he said simply, hoping that Eli's memory was clear about those words, at least.
"In that case, give me a Ferrari and buy me exclusive access to the theater," he teased back. "You have to put a ring on it for cars, but I can see what I can do about the theatre," Joaco replied with a chuckle.
Eli remembered those words; his expression softened considerably, "I'll protect you too." He reached up to gently grab Joaco's hand to give it a couple of kisses. He paused, "What can I give you?"
At his question, however, Joaco licked his lips and grinned devilishly. "Your body, I thought I was pretty clear by now." In jest, but still wanting to, he gave Eli's hip a light slap since he couldn't reach his real target. "Just kidding," he added after a moment, ruffling Eli's hair and then leaning back on his arms. "I want your trust like I've always said."
Eli stuck his tongue out before turning a bit more serious, "I think I'm getting closer to feeling comfortable with that. To have every inch of me." He paused, "Including my guy V-card."
Joaco laughed sheepishly. "So you haven't… just like Kyo, huh?" It made Joaco grin.
Eli returned a sheepish grin, "I guess not. I've done other things but not that." Joaco winked at Eli abruptly, as he's wont to do.
At the mention of trust, he nodded, "I do trust you. Why… is trust so important to you? I never met someone in which that is the most important virtue to them…." His hands moved to Joaco's sides, and he gently ran his fingers up and down. "I ask not to question it. Trust is very important; it is your button."
"You'll understand someday. Don't worry too much about it for now." With a grin, Joaco leaned back, pulling Eli down with him until his back hit the towel, looking up at the other man to play with his soft hair. "Just know that you're important to me."
"Ahh!" Eli didn't expect this, but he let himself fall, trusting him to hold him. He stopped himself with a hand on either side of Joaco. It reminded him of something and thus laughed nervously. He let himself fall to one side and cuddled up to his boyfriend, running his foot along Joaco's leg.
He lidded his eyes, loving Joaco playing with his hair, "You're so important to me too. I hope you aren't leading me like a lamb to the slaughter…" he giggled. "I'm teasing."
"I did warn you about breaking your heart," Joaco shifted to let Eli rest his head on his arm as he used the other hand to continue playing with his hair. "But I do want to eat you up like a wolf," he said and immediately followed with some wistful howling until he cracked up, his laugh deep and rich.
At the mention of breaking his heart, Eli's eyes widened again. He almost chastised Joaco for bringing it up again. But then the other man-made another joke, and Eli couldn't help but laugh at it. Even though his mind went right in the gutter with that remark.
"Oh no, I don't think I can handle another person turning into an animal," Eli teased. "No wolf turning."
He paused and smiled a bit more genuinely.
"I like your laugh," Eli remarked. "I wonder, are you ticklish?" He attempted to find out.
Joaco's reflexes were so good that he shifted to trap Eli's hand almost immediately. "No~ I will bite if you try that." He gave his boyfriend a glare, and to demonstrate, brought his hand closer to nip at his fingertips.
"I like your smile and laugh, too, especially when you talk about all of those theatre things I can barely remember." It wasn't a diss, and he was always happy to engage with Eli's hobbies, but he doubted he'd ever remember all of those details.
Eli jumped as he suddenly found his hand grabbed, "No fair. You've been gymming for like fifty billion years. But…" He grinned wickedly. "Ah-ha, you are ticklish. I bet you giggle if I get in a tickle. I think it would be worth it, getting a bite." He reached over with his free hand attempting to poke at a common ticklish place.
"I'm going to have to have you sit through some of my favorites," Eli replied. "And you should have me watch your favorite movie if you have one."
After repeated tickling attempts, Joaco rolled them over, putting his weight on Eli as he pinned down both of his hands next to his head on each side. "I'd watch them," Joaco replied despite their new positioning. "And I watch movies, but I would be lying if I said any particular favorites."
Maybe he should; it was normal to, yet he didn't. Joaco's childhood was probably far from the standard for a multitude of reasons.
"Are you behaving, or are you staying in my humble prison?"
"What other wholesome activities would you like to enjoy with me?" Eli asked as he tried to struggle against Joaco but could not get very far. "We have the gym. We have musicals I'm going to show you." He smirked evilly because he knew this was quite a position Joaco had him in.
"Can't I just give you a little tickle?" Eli asked as he showed the small gesture with his fingers.
"I'm going to bite your neck and never let go," Joaco said it casually as he looked into Eli's eyes. "But to answer your question, I'd like to ride a bicycle with you. Maybe go swimming, maybe go to an arcade… I just want dates, to be a good boyfriend even if I'm not your boyfriend after this day passes."
Eli's smile vanished suddenly, "Just back to no labels, huh? Okay." He had misinterpreted what Joaco had said earlier. And it did bother him a little, still. But Joaco had his reasons. He would trust it. But he didn't have to like it. Besides, he'd take the less over, the more. He just wanted to be with Joaco, "We can do all those things." He nudged Joaco, "I promise I won't tickle you. Well, for now. I may try in the future. Maybe I will be able to slam you to the ground eventually." His wicked smile returned.
Leaning down, he gently and lightly sealed Eli's lips for a lingering moment. "That is up to you to decide by the end of the day," Joaco replied sincerely as he let go of Eli to sit up next to him, shifting to try and get Eli to rest his head on his lap. "You'll never beat me, anyway. I'm built like a brick house. It runs in the family."
Eli had hoped all this talk of heartbreak would be over, and yet it was still here. He closed his eyes slowly, letting Joaco kiss his lips, just feeling the touch, absorbing it. As Joaco let go, he lingered on the ground, trying to compose himself. Everything Joaco said to him today, it all meant something. He had to trust that.
He sat up slowly, opening his eyes, letting himself be nudged to lay in Joaco's lap. He looked out on the ocean, watching the waves beat against the shoreline. The water was coming up, but it would go out again.
"One day," he said, smiling a little, his voice cracking a little. "I'll beat you. I may have to transform, but I will."
It was easier to play with Eli's hair now, so he did that, gently massaging his scalp and looking at Sondheim from the corner of his eye, who was now barking at some bird on the tree he was resting by.
"Don't count on it," he hummed, smiling over at Eli. "The sun is starting to set," he mentioned, looking over at the sky with its different hues shifting and changing.
Eli liked this. He lidded his eyes and mumbled some nonsense before managing, "This feels nice. It could fall asleep like this. It's like you're sucking the thoughts right out of my head here." He winced at Sondheim's barks, "I hope that is something innocuous."
Joaco gently shushed him. "He's just playing; relax."
Eli opened his eyes at the mention of sunset. It did look beautiful. He couldn't ask for a better day, "It's so beautiful. Will you stay with me when the stars come out?"
"You are beautiful," Joaco spoke as he looked down at Eli, teasing him by lightly scratching behind his ears. "We'll be together all day until I take you back home. Now take a little nap, and let's enjoy our little forever."
Eli hadn't been sleeping all that well for a week, and even though this day would end, something about this position and the playing with his hair really had a way of relaxing him. Didn't he tell Joaco he would stop thinking and relax for once?
"I don't want to miss anything," Eli insisted as he curled his legs up. The adult way of saying no nap.
"The only thing you'll miss is a little nap, so take it," Joaco insisted right back, careful fingers moving to gently massage Eli's neck, enjoying his warmth and the weight of his head on his lap.
Eli glanced upward towards Joaco at his insistence. Daddy energy. But it did feel really nice and relaxing. His eyes felt so heavy. And his thoughts and concerns about everything became garbled and dissipated into nothing. His body suddenly became heavier, with his breathing becoming more even. The sound of the waves. The feeling of Joaco's warmth was close to him. And the smell of sea salt. And silence.
Joaco continued to lightly massage Eli, his thoughts shelved away for later as he enjoyed that pause, that silence that wasn't quite silence, but it was indeed peaceful. The soft rumbling of leaves, the light breeze against his skin, and Eli's sweet sleeping face.
This moment, it was perfect, and Joaco was going to enjoy it as much as life allowed him to.