WHO: Joaco & Faihan WHEN: February 10 WHERE: PapĂĄ Bravo's House SUMMARY: Joaco pops in for a treat, and the boys worry over Eli, and then Faihan worries over Eli and Joaco. So business as usual. CW: A brief mention of October?
But heâd started bringing some of the food that would not be good to sell the next day with him, depositing it in the kitchens on his way to find Alejo. This was all so very new, and he did not feel like he should be anywhere in this house without Alejo as his escort, but he also knew that one dayâŠhe would likely live here as a part of this household. For Alejoâs sake, he wanted to try to at least get used to being there without Alejo as a shield.
He was starting this effort with an olive branch, because it was still weird to be in a house where there was a staff. It didnât seem like the Bravos put on airs around their staff, but even so, it was a strange situation for him, so he brought sweets, as a kind of apologyâwhat he was apologizing for, he still could not put a finger on, but he felt like he should do something nice for the people who were taking care of this home.
And thus he crept down the hall, almost getting lost twice, but following his nose eventually to the correct room. He knocked on the door, and a few of the kitchen staff looked up and greeted him. Faihan slinked his way into the room, which was, in truth, even bigger than AzĂșcarâs kitchen, putting down a neat brown box on the counter and opening it.
âMore umâŠsugar for the kids,â he explained as a man heâd come to know as Manolo (though, being head chef, the kitchen staff called him âJefeâ) wiped his hands on a rag and came over. âZalabya. Itâs my momâs recipe⊠They might be a little soggy now.â He cleared his throat as Manolo thanked him and popped one in his mouth.
âWhatâs in the syrup?â
âHint of orange blossomâŠâ Faihan said, clearing his throat. âAnd cinnamon.â
Manolo wiped his lips and turned to the door, and Faihan followed his gaze.
âHey, Lolo do youââ Joaco, clad in a suit, came to a screeching halt as his very expensive shoes made some friction against the kitchen tile when he stopped to look over at someone else in the kitchen. âFee Fee, long time no see,â he offered a little wave at him, and then at the rest of the kitchen staff. âI see youâre bringing the best bakery homeâNo offense, Lolo.â
Faihan stared for a moment, like a little deer suddenly surprised by a snapping branch. It wasnât like he was trying to take over this kitchen, which he feared someone might think if he spent too much time here. It just was the second least foreign place in the house to him after the gym. It was easiest to connect with others who cooked for a living. Maybe it was simply because he was still afraid to be alone in the house, for fear of seeming like he was putting on airs and acting like he belonged there⊠Well, his feelings about this home were complicated.
But he saw it was Joaco and visibly relaxed. âHello, stranger,â he replied, leaning against the counter as the chef chuckled at Joacoâs remark and made what seemed to Faihan like an inside joke (at least he didnât really get it), sauntering back to work. It would, in so many ways, make so much more sense to Faihan if he were part of the staff here; it was so much harder imagining that he could be part of the family they fed.
âNormally, I wouldnât offer you free treats until after youâd made weird faces at me from outside, but I guess Iâll make an exception this timeâŠâ
Joaco chuckled, waving at Martina before he approached Faihan. âWas that my tax to get them?â Without asking, he was reaching into the boxâŠ
âHow are you, looking for Alejandro?â
âNo, I know where he isâŠif he is doing what heâs supposed toâŠâ Faihan frowned, because it was highly possible that Alejo wasnât working on his homework. âI justâŠthought IâdâŠâ His face turned red, because there was no way to be in the Bravoâs houseâwithout Alejoâand not feel like he was being presumptuous, and he was especially nervous about Joaco thinking he was getting ahead of himself. âI donât know. Just saying âhiâ I guess.â His fingers flexed as he glanced over at Martina, as though he wanted to take some of the silverware she was polishing... He would feel more at home if he could justâŠdo that. He could disappear into this space, doing simple chores and food preparation, being barked at to watch this pan or clean that knifeâŠbut he was outside of even this place. He sighed and shook his head.
âYou clean up nice.â
With a laugh, Joaco reached over to lightly poke Faihanâs cheek. âYouâre cute, knowing his schedule alreadyâbut thanks, you look good too.â He reached back to rub the nape of his neck, staring at Faihan for a moment longer as he bit into the treat he stole and chewed it. âYouâre always welcome here, you know, since youâre my friend, too, aside from being my brother in law.â He winked before he took another bite.
âI wonât take much of your time, though, Iâm just taking a small break before heading out again.â
âHeâs probably not doing his homework. Heâs probably playing on hisâŠTwitch?â Was that what it was called? Faihan sighed ruefully and Joaco laughed with rumbling amusement. âAnyway, I already told youâŠtake up my time. I want to hang out.â He cleared his throat. It wasâŠnot something he had admitted before, even if he thought it was fairly clear that it was true. He had sought Joaco out many times, even if they had also argued many times during those times. Actions over words. He still preferred things that way. But he could admit that he wanted to hang out nowâŠand only blush a lot.
He slid onto a nearby stool, folding his hands together on the countertop and ducking his head. âThough it is trueâŠthat talking to me, youâre risking a mention of musty memories, likeâŠIâm glad you donât look alike anymore, so you canât pretend to be him and tease me.â
Joacoâs smile softened, saying nothing about the honest display of feelings, but he rubbed Faihanâs shoulder with his clean hand in a showcase of affection before pulling out a stool to sit next to his friend.
âHow do you know I donât have a secret trick to change my appearance? Butââ he wiped his hands clean on a napkin. âI didnât even have to look like him this time.â His grin was goofy, yet proud, and he was sure Faihan would know what the meant.
Faihan looked down, embarrassed. He knew very well what Joaco meant. He shook his head again. He had a type, he guessed. âNo one can accuse me of being inconsistent at least.â He looked up again and smiled, trying to make it look exasperated, but there was something too soft about his expression to sell it.
Joaco leaned in closer, grinning and making eye contact with Faihan. âMaybe if Titus wasnât here, Halloween would have been a lot different,â he whispered, but then he lightly slapped his friendâs back as he leaned away from him.
âWhy are you like this, JoaquĂn?â Faihan muttered, lightly pushing his arm. âI amâŠreally grateful for what you did that night. But please, donât bring up the rest! Itâs embarrassing.â He took a zalabya and nibbled it. Mostly for something to do as he burned with embarrassment. It took him a moment to shed, but only a moment, and then he continued, âThere was a learning curveâŠfiguring out how to be friends hereâŠand there, too, I guess. But we got around to it eventually. Thatâs what matters.â So he was a little worried about what might happen next in the otherâŠtimeline. It was a potent moment in their past livesâŠ
Those were wise words, so Joaco had nothing to say other than nod his head.
âI stand by my original impression though. This is not a bad form, so you should probably stick with it.â Joaco patted his jaw a few times at those words. Faihan rolled his eyes, but smiled, and then, popping the sweet into his mouthâusing the moment as an excuse to study Joacoâhe asked, âAre you okay? You and Eli have been a little quiet on the network sinceâŠmy strange guest dropped by. Probably the wholeâŠâ Iâm going to stab you! ââŠWell, it probably was stressful. I wasâŠpretty scared, but Alejo sleeps like the dead. So I couldnât get him up until after it was over.â
âIâm fine,â he replied in traditional Joaco fashion, offering a careless shrug. âI just wish he would keep his word for once, but arguing is too important for him, I guess.â He pulled at his sleeve to look at his very expensive smartwatch. âAnd⊠well, I guess he is disappointed in me, too. It might be for the best.â
Faihanâs brow crooked at the last remark. âIs he mad that youâre likeâŠpuzzle inception?â he asked, keeping his tone light. âI was surprisedâŠthat he did go allâŠâ He held up his hands and made a quiet, Rawr! sound. âHe used to be so timid. Like, after the film festival, he wouldnât even admit what had happened to us.â He looked away, his amusement fading. âI donâtâŠlike it. It feels like, heâs either getting desperate or cocky. Either one is dangerous.â
âMe? Iâm pretty easy to understand.â Joaco stared longingly at the remaining baked goods, and slowly, his fingers made the trip over to pick up another. âHe has changed,â he said simply, softly, before taking a bite. âI thinkâ I think Kyoâs memories get the best of him despite what I told him.â He sighed, dark eyes focusing on a few fallen crumbs. âI suppose it was inevitable, but Iâm worried, regardless of the reason.â He took another bite, considering his words.
âStriking a hornetâs nest is never a smart idea.â
âNo, if you see an angry snakeâŠwalk the other way. Thatâs common sense.â He licked the sugar from his fingertips, enjoying the faint aroma of orange. âI guessâŠKyo was like that. Like Titus. And Zuya. I wasâŠat first, too. Here. When I came hereâŠto Mar Luna⊠I couldnât speak Spanish well. I was so short and so shrimpy, too. Everyone made fun of me all the time, but I wasnât allowed to fight, because thatâs not what smart boys do, right? So I was just mad. I sucked it up, and I was mad. And I was mad for a really long time, until I put all that anger on my parents, and then I was mad, because of how they reacted to all that, and the world and I justâŠwe were enemies. So it was easier to throw a punch than run from an actual monster. ButâŠIâŠdonât feel so mad anymore. Itâs like a fog is slowly pulling away, and I can see things better. Somehow, between here and there, Eli and I switched roles, and thatâsâŠso scary. He was so much like you when I first was getting to know him. All, super cool and super hot and like, who even cares about that, right? Everything was just easy-peasy, no strings attached⊠And still, he looked before he leaped. I thinkâŠwe are going to have to start doing that, especially if weâre going to be honest about all of this with everyoneâŠâ
Joacoâs smile faded into something more somber, staring at something and nothing at the same time, his gaze wandering beyond what he could physically see. He reached over to place his hand over Faihanâs, giving it a light squeeze. âIâm sorry Iâm a terrible friend,â he spoke softly, carefully, almost completely devoid of his usual upbeat disposition. âIâm proud of you, though,â he tilted his head to look over at Faihan with a small smile adorning his lips. âAnd I know youâll watch out for everyone. Yours is the biggest heart there is, even if you couldnât see it before. Just⊠be careful, okay? Iâll try to keep Eli out of trouble the best I can, even if he gets mad at me.â
Faihan laughed, confusion flickering across his expression. âYouâre not a terrible friend. I donâtâŠwant to talk about how messy I was on Halloween. But if you hadnât reached out to me⊠It felt like I was staring into this void, and I couldnât step back from it, not until you reached out a hand. SoâŠyouâre not a terrible friend.â He looked up from Joacoâs hand on his own. âYou taught me how to be a good friend. BecauseâŠif I ever knew how in this life, I had forgotten.â He shrugged, feeling a little embarrassed at how open this conversation had become.
Joaco simply let out a soft chuckle followed by a breathless sigh, not feeling like arguing with his friendâs kind words. A little voice in the back of his head, though, that one reminded him they couldnât possibly be true.
âThoughâŠI donât know. It scares me for you to talk like this, like you can see something is about to end?â He looked down, his brow furrowing. âI donât know what happened in the past, but we are friends. You didnât let me face that void alone. I wonât let you face anythingâeven if itâs big or scary or justâŠreally messed up⊠I wonât abandon you to deal with that by yourself either.â
âHow could I possible know what waits for us in the future any more than you do?â Joaco leaned back, folding his arms over his chest. âBut I can tell you one thing, and itâs the same thing I tell every one of youâ That you donât have to worry about me. Iâm fine, Iâm used to caring for myself aloneâ I mean it.â He wet his lips and cast his gaze towards a window to his left. âThat said, Iâll be there for you whenever you need me.â
Faihan nodded, his eyes still lowered. âI was, too. Fine by myself, I mean. I liked it that way. Not having to trust anyone, not having anyone around me who could fail me or betray me or do things the wrong way.â He chuckled breathily. âBut you are also the one who told me to stop with the one-man island shtick. I took your advice, andâŠIâm better this way.â He glanced at Joaco, not smiling, but contemplative and soft. âMy life is better this way. I know youâre fine, and I know you will be there for me. You already have been. You helped me believe that that could happen for meâŠagain. After all those yearsâŠyou reopened that door, andâŠshowed me that opening my doors wasnât just a guarantee of more pain. So I hopeâŠone day you do take your own advice. I hope that you trust me, the way I trusted you that night, and if you are alone with your demons, that you call for me. Not because Iâm obligated to help you, but because⊠I want to.â
He slid off the stool. âBut I thinkâŠyou probably have some fish to fry, right? Tell your abuela hello for me.â
âHow you were and how I amâwe have very different reasons to be who we are.â It was plain to see to Joaco, but he saw no reason to elaborate, so he simply met Faihanâs gaze in a silent exchange. âThere are no demons. They are more like cute little goats.â But despite his words, Joaco clearly had attentively listened to Faihan. And despite himself, Faihan did snort with amusement at the little goats remark. It was sort of cute to imagine Joaco being chased by a bunch of baby goatsâŠ
âYou got meâyou should stop by sometime. Earlier so I can tell her to fry the best catch of the day for you.â He followed, standing up. âAnywayâŠI should go.â
Faihan decided that he should not pressure Joaco. Not because he had given up on the idea that it might in some way be helpful someday to the guy, but because it was no doubt true that they had different reasons to walk that same path. But also, he did think that Joaco was listening to him, and he didnât want to ruin that. If he just left it alone, maybe it would sink in. Maybe, someday, Joaco would feel safe asking for help if he needed it.
âI do, on occasion, eat fish,â Faihan admitted. âLess blood and, wellâŠâ He shrugged. âSo Iâll take you up on that. My one fish of the year.â He paused at the doorway and stood there awkwardly for a moment, because it wasnât really his thing, but he wanted to. He cleared his throat and reached out to pluck at the hem of Joacoâs sleeve. âLetâsâŠum, hug orâŠyou donât have to.â
âI knew you liked my hugs better.â Joaco joked with a goofy grin, opening up his arms to take Faihan in, giving him a warm squeeze, and lingering for a moment longer before releasing him. âThank you for being my friend,â he offered sincerely, but then, he walked away, waving his hand.
âSee you around, Fee Fee.â
As he had so many times before, Faihan watched Joaco walk away. But he smiled a bit this time, still feeling the strength of Joacoâs arms around him. His shoulders were so broad. Faihan hoped that they would remain straight and confident, whatever was to come next. He hopedâŠ
He shook his head and waved, a moment too late perhaps.
âSee you, Coco.â
And then he turned, off to find if his boyfriend was doing his homework, or playing games.