Kiryu "Joshua" Yoshiya || 桐生 義弥, (yeshua) wrote in marinasylum, @ 2009-09-07 22:34:00 |
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Current mood: | listless |
Entry tags: | :action, joshua kiryu, ken murata, vash the stampede, yuuri shibuya |
[Action || Open]
[Joshua does not like the situation at all. He hates having to explain himself... Hates it above all else. Because then he has to actually think about some personal issues that he would rather dismiss entirely. As he sees it, he gave up his humanity to be something far more. Far greater. The average, visible world never had much appeal to him, as he could always see the Game being played even as a child. It is how he met Sanae. How he got interested in the Reaper's Game. It's partially why he because Composer.
It's his nature to retreat from everything when he has to think too hard on who he is. Why he does what he does. It's easy to pretend to be some jerk that doesn't care about what is going on. Easy to get in people's faced and invade everything there is about them. It keeps them at a distance. Keeps them from prying. Exception to Megumi and Sanae and perhaps Neku a little bit. Megumi knew his true nature, the one hidden beneath the other facets of his personality. What Joshua really innately desires. But Megumi never showcased it or threw it in his face. Sanae would just... Well that is another story entirely.
"You seem lonely" is what that man had set to him, after that whole mess. Joshua had been able to flee in a near tantrum before he needed to answer.
Now he couldn't do that. Couldn't really escape what truth he had told Sentience today. If he had his powers, that would have been one thing. He could have just lost himself in the sea of thoughts of everyone else and just forget about it. Snark at people. Cut them down. Now? He couldn't. Now he is exactly what he never wanted to be again... Just a fifteen year old kid stuck. Stuck dealing with feelings, issues that he shouldn't have to deal with. He isn't alive anymore... Why should he? Why should the Composer ever have to admit to all of that? He's above that all, isn't he?
Either way... Joshua is sitting in a corner, away from everyone else. He's really too busy thinking rather than trying to function as all the others should. The fact is... He is actually more upset that people who weren't guilty this time around had been punished. It's a thought that is bothering him and he'd sooner be left alone. His eyes can't even really be seen at the moment and he lacks his cell phone. It's still with Murata.]