[ there's a pause before Soubi speaks. ] He talked about you often. 'Ritsuka would like this,' or 'Ritsuka would say that.' His fondness for you seemed genuine, but Seimei could make anything seem genuine. I was never foolish enough to think that he cared about me. But I didn't need to be cared about. I didn't need affection; I needed orders. I needed to be governed. Seimei did that well. And I thought, at least, that I was useful to him. But he threw me away.
[ first Ritsu had given him away, and then Seimei. he was so used to hearing how strong he was, how valuable. but if he was so strong and valuable, how could he be discarded so easily? ]
It is impossible to know Seimei's mind. He treats everyone politely. He speaks gently, acts kindly. But the truth is that he hates everyone who isn't himself. You come closest to him, so maybe he was willing to give you a chance. But you are right about one thing, Ritsuka. If Seimei cared about you, he wouldn't have left you.