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Zero Kiryuu ([info]instrumented) wrote in [info]marinanova,
@ 2016-09-27 01:35:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:ai kuran, haruka kuran, ichiru kiryuu, ren kiryuu, yuuki kuran, zero kiryuu

(backdated) 394 ; action ; closed to the Kiryuu-Kuran apt
[It had taken a fair bit of effort to put everything together, but none of it that wasn't enjoyable. While Zero did do a majority of the cooking, the others helped out here and there. In retrospect, the sheer amount of foods and ingredients he picked up the day before wasn't too much at all. In a general sense Zero made sure that the apartment was well stocked.

Unlike breakfast the other day, tonight their meal is set up more like a buffet, with a good variety of dishes, some of which he's only recently learned how to make. Plenty of meat and fish, a few noodle dishes, salads, etc etc. In hopes it would maybe get Ichiru to at least stop by, too, Zero made the tomato soup that they both used to love when growing up.

Dessert is of course provided as well. More specifically, a sundae bar. A little later on after they've eaten he'll set up the bowls, ice cream, and fixings along the counter.]



(ooc: This is a free for all mingle, so tag as you please! Wildcards welcome!)


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OTA; let me know if I need to fix anything~
[info]concealed_heart
2016-09-27 10:44 pm UTC (link)
[ Family

Did those words actually mean anything to him right now? Probably not, but he can't deny that there's a morbid side to him that wants to make some effort to maybe fix his bad habits but they were going to baby steps. One at a time really. That's what led him here anyhow.

After having a brief conversation with his brother and the extended invitation, Ichiru didn't say yes or no on the matter. He dismissed it all together and the conversation ended as it always did, dead. There's a small sigh from his mouth as he stood outside the complex. Honestly, he didn't know why he led himself here or how he managed to blindly maneuver his way in this direction.

The place was crawling with Kurans...every last one of them...except for Zero. He stared at the building with briefly knitted brows, contemplating if the effort he made was worth anything at all. He was already quite perplexed that he suddenly had some sort of family thanks to his brother.

Not that'd he find any point in stomping on his brother's happiness. Zero deserved that and much more. He really didn't know what else to do beyond this and it took him a matter of minutes where he planted his feet for his to slowly curb his heels around and attempt to leave the apartment before prying eyes caught his presence...or scent

Whatever came first. ]

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IT'S PERFECT ;o; uncle he just wants to love you
[info]romanticlove
2016-09-28 01:25 am UTC (link)
[Ren spotted him around the same time his scent registered. It wasn't so different than his father's, but there was something decidedly more human about the scent that distinguished them. Ren didn't need to smell it to sense his uncle's unease. That didn't stop Ren from watching him from the apartment window. For a moment he debates just leaving him there until his father collected him but in the end he finds himself leaving their apartment to stop him from leaving.]

Ah- wait!! You came for dinner, right? Fa- He invited you, didn't he?

[Moving swiftly to catch up before he walked too far away, Ren resists the urge to reach out and touch him. He then bites the inside of his cheek, resisting the use of his usual term of endearment for his father. He didn't know how Ichiru would react. It was already undeniable that they were related by blood. He looked every bit a Kiryuu as they did. The only difference was he was definitely an Aristocrat Vampire thanks to his mother's Pureblood status.]

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IDK about perfect but glad you liked it and lololl. no love. :|
[info]concealed_heart
2016-09-29 12:41 am UTC (link)
[ This was beyond baffling for him, considering how far his memory was and how time seemed to move without him because he as supposed to die. He never actually made it to death before he found himself in this prison. Begrudgingly, he could tell that the boy was of relation to his family. The appearances were definitely uncanny.

It was almost like he was looking in a damn mirror. It's startling and creepy to him but he reminded himself that these people who claimed to be his relatives were in a far off future that he did not exist in. Even if he didn't die, he would have been dead before they existed.

He takes a moment to process the information of someone talking to him and ushering him to get inside. It's not like he's surprised at the words that almost came out of the boys mouth. These things didn't seem to surprise him anymore. ]


...

[ After a long moment of awkward silence he speaks. ]

He did say something about dinner.

[ With all of them... somehow that thought was rather problematic for him. He faced the boy now watching him carefully and prepared to take any action if he were to feel like he was in any sort of danger. Maybe it was better that he didn't come at all. ]

Never mind. It's not necessary.

[ Compared to the girl, the boy seemed relatively relaxed and calm-- insistent but not demanding. ]

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[info]romanticlove
2016-09-29 12:47 am UTC (link)
[If Ren was insistent it was because he was so anxious to know someone else who knew his father so well. For as long as he could remember it was only their immediate family he could talk to. Hunters and Vampires alike did not approve of his existence so it wasn't as if he could ask anyone second hand about his family. Ichiru was his family, whether the hunter liked it or not.]

Ah- are you sure? I think it would... it would make father very happy if you came to dinner. I think he was planning to make tomato soup...?

[He knows hearing him address his father as such would surely only rankle his uncle further. He wasn't comfortable with his relationship with his family any more than hunters and aristocrats were when Ren was growing up. He understood the tension it caused.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-09-29 01:06 am UTC (link)
He finds the silliest things to be content about.

[ Such as a word as family had little meaning to Ichiru at this point. He's already set on not accepting of this, regardless of who was trying to convince him. He was incredibly stubborn for someone who seemed to always be nonchalant about the world around him since Shizuka's passing.

Having a place to call his own was a challenge and it would always continue to be. He's pretty adamant on convincing himself that such acceptance was wasted on someone like him. There's a slight chuckle from his lips, listening to the boy speak about the tomato soup. Did his brother really--? ]

Honestly, that Zero. He never knows when to give up. [ There's a pause. ] For what purpose would it serve for me to play this pretend game of house?

[ Because it certainly feels that way. Of course, whatever Ren chose to call Zero, he doesn't seem to care much for it. He's still wrapping his head around all the different time lapses. ]

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[info]romanticlove
2016-09-29 09:04 am UTC (link)
It isn't pretend!

[Ren crosses his arms, practically glaring at his uncle. This wasn't how he pictured getting to know him or meeting him but his father had warned him it would be difficult. This wasn't how he wanted things to be at all.]

We're a family. All of us... including you. Even if it's just to see father and you ignore the rest of us, you should come.

[After thousand years, he was perfectly fine with a hunter treating him like a monster. It was expected, in its own way. He just wished said hunter wasn't his uncle.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-09-30 12:02 am UTC (link)
[ In which only earns a rather neutral look from Ichiru and a scoff that follows moments after. Honestly, why do these people put up with him? He's been nothing but unpleasant from the beginning. There was no mask this time. It was too much effort to pretend like he cared about people he didn't know. Of course, nothing is as they want it to be. ]

You sound like him.

[ He replied a long moment of silence. ]

You shouldn't waste your time. I'm not interested family or not. You'll only get hurt in the process.

[ This conversation wasn't even about Ichiru treating a vampire like a monster. He's quite fond of them in general. Such beings were strong and beautiful as they live for many centuries.

Unfortunately for the boy, Ichiru had never been a hunter nor did he have any interest in being one. ]

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[info]romanticlove
2016-10-01 10:25 pm UTC (link)
That's a bit presumptuous don't you think? The only one excluding you is yourself so I can't see how it would hurt us in the end.

[He'd lived a lot longer and knew eventually his uncle would pass long before he was born. Why shouldn't he at least take the time he has to spend it with his own flesh and blood? It might not be him that benefits from that but his father would, certainly.]

You're here and father is here. Don't waste something like that by being distant.

[As for himself and Ai... he knew that would take a lot longer for his uncle to come around to.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-10-04 05:32 pm UTC (link)
You do understand such things are of little significance to me, ne? I don't have any intentions to get closer to you or anyone else in your family. No matter the effort, I don't think I'll ever truly accept any of you.

I mean you will only be wasting your time.

[ It doesn't really matter who does or doesn't get benefits from building that relationships. In the end, Ichiru made those choices for himself so he doesn't technically feel bad about it. He doesn't mind excluding himself from the picture. It's honestly a better choice for him. ]

I choose to do what I want. Not even you can tell me what to do.

[ It will an immense amount of effort. At least with the boy, he's more willing to carry a conversation with him, regardless of how distant he sounds. ]

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[info]romanticlove
2016-10-04 07:36 pm UTC (link)
You came here, even though you feel that way.

[Granted Ren was trying to keep him from leaving but still - he made the effort to come all the way out here, right?]

At least say hello to father, even if you don't stay.

[Somehow he hopes his father will be better at roping him into staying than Ren is.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-10-04 10:59 pm UTC (link)
It was a mistake to come here in the first place. I should have known better.

[ He did and the effort wasn't made in vain despite what he says. Everyone learns that the things Ichiru will do sometimes contradicts what he says. It's a common thing with him. He doesn't know what he wants most of the time. Usually his actions are a lot more honest than his sharp words. ]

I suppose I can.

[ He knows how Zero is when he doesn't at least greet him. His brother can be a bit troublesome at times not that he minds it but it really just depends on his mood. ]

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[info]romanticlove
2016-10-08 02:03 pm UTC (link)
[Almost as if a light goes off in his mind, Ren realizes that perhaps by convincing him of this much will mean his uncle will stay for the whole meal if it made his father happy. It was a step in the right direction, wasn't it? He wanted to get to know him.]

Please... come upstairs and see him.

[He wasn't begging anymore, only directing and hoping his uncle will follow through.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-10-14 02:00 am UTC (link)
[ Honestly, he doesn’t know what’s running through that boy’s mind but he’s not going to try to unravel it. Ren is right though. He’s fine seeing Zero. He’s the only one that really matters to him, despite how awful he’s been treating his brother. Not to mention the many times he’s antagonized himself in the other’s presence. Yet, Zero would never stop coming back to convince him otherwise. ]

I’ll do it when I feel in the mood for it.

[ He replied. Being told or requested to do something does make him not want to do it. Such a contradicting character Ichiru is. He’s at least fine with the fact that Ren isn’t begging him. It would have probably just make him leave again. ]

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[info]romanticlove
2016-10-14 02:13 am UTC (link)
Of course. Then I'll just... see you upstairs then.

[He isn't sure what to do. Does he go find somewhere else to explore for a bit and miss out on his uncle visiting, potentially? He didn't know what to do in this situation. The stories he'd heard of his uncle felt as if they were different than this, though his childhood often colored a few details differently, to be sure.]

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♥
[info]instrumented
2016-09-28 03:11 am UTC (link)
[Despite inviting and hoping for Ichiru to show up, Zero also knew that he shouldn't set his expectations all that high.So even while he felt his brother approaching the apartment door, that's not a promise that he'll decide to enter, and certainly not one to say he would actually stay. Even in a general sense there's the fact that - yes - every one of them inside is a vampire, and ones he hardly cares about. It's a challenge as it is to even get one-on-one time with Ichiru.

Zero opens the door without hesitation. Unlike Ren, too, he does reach out to catch Ichiru's hand before he can turn back.]

At least stay for a bowl?

[There's no need to further describe what he's talking about. . . and no matter the fact that he can always make some to leave at Ichiru's doorstep. It's nicer when they eat together.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-09-29 12:46 am UTC (link)
[ He really shouldn't when Ichiru was constantly his ball of disappointment. He wouldn't continue to disappoint his brother with his actions. There's no denying that. However, it looked like such a big step for him to attempt to make it to the door and leave when he didn't feel comfortable enough to walk through it.

His leaving was abruptly stopped when a firm hand grasps his. It's always the same feeling he gets when his other half was near. ]

You went out of your way just to make it?

[ He replied, as he stifles a small chuckle, though the laughter was not the type that Zero would want. It seemed more bitter than anything. ]

Do you really think I'll be able to get along with them all?

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[info]instrumented
2016-09-29 01:29 am UTC (link)
[It's both unfortunate however expected to hear that kind of response, just as such a laugh is. And Zero does hate how he can recognize it, if only for himself. Ichiru probably already knows— but isn't blamed for it. There's no true resentment for his brother. There never has been.]

You were the first in mind when I decided to make it. I wanted to in general, but. . . it's especially for you.

[Yuuki, Ai, and Ren knew so as well. He can't say the same for Haruka, though, but that's understandable.

His grasp upon Ichiru's hand tightens a little.]

I think you can try. They know that it isn't especially like you, or that it's easy, but. . . They also want to include you. [Ren and Ai especially want to know their uncle.] Even if you stay for ten minutes they would be glad.

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-09-29 11:55 pm UTC (link)
[ It was pointless for him to continue to hate on the one person that would never give up on him no matter what sort of things he's involved himself in. Somehow, he felt like the effort he made was some sort of mistake. Such a foolish brother Zero is. He can't really say anything to those words. No matter how they came out he always could tell they were sincere and from the bottom of his heart. ]

Honestly, you--

[ He seemed perplexed and conflicted with the words. Honestly, a small part of him would like to try and see where it would lead him while, the other part of him was reminding him that he couldn't get attached. Getting attached meant having openings. He didn't want that.

He felt the grip tighten even more. Was Zero that desperate for him to stay? That was rhetorical since he knew the answers. There's an exasperated sigh from him. He had really no energy to argue and trying to find an excuse for why he made it this far was harder. He'd have to make do. ]

Of course it isn't...why would I try to get along with--- strangers?

[ He knits his brows together at the words. ] What do they know of me to even consider such a thought?

[ Color him a bit curious but honestly what did strangers really see in him. As much as he can carry a decent conversation with Yuuki, he can't imagine ever getting along with him. The same was said for the other two. At least for now, he's not outright denying the invitation. ]

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[info]instrumented
2016-09-30 09:35 pm UTC (link)
[With that reply, and even more so in spite of himself, Zero can feel as his temper flares. One sign of it is how his grip tightens around Ichiru's hand. Not so much that it would especially hurt, but noticeable regardless. He does well enough (for now) to keep it down.]

They know that you're their uncle, and their family. They know how they would never get the chance to even meet you back home, and how they have wanted to. Even if from your point of view that they really are more like strangers than otherwise.

[Proof enough that he can recognize there being truth within Ichiru's claim.]

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-10-04 05:28 pm UTC (link)
[ It's not the best way he can answer the question but it's the way he knows how to. He can't help feel like he's being overwhelmed by things he can't completely understand or have control over. It's nothing against anyone in particular. He notices the tightening grip on his arm. He knows that's the kind of reaction he'll get for what he said. ]

I'm the person that deprived us of our parents, and them of their grandparents. It's hard to believe they'd want to pursue with a relationship with someone whose been nothing short of a murderer.

[ It's ridiculously funny that they want to even make that effort, but he's obviously not laughing at the matter. It's a lot to think on and if he wants to move forward for himself and everyone around him, he's going to have to admit some things in life can't be controlled. Even if he thinks a certain way, there's no guarantee that everyone else will. He knows that but admitting to it has always been a fight. ]

...

[ He's quiet for a long moment, before he decides to add. ]

Alright. [ pause. ] Don't blame me if this turns out unfavorable you and them in the end.

[ After all he's insistent. ]

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[info]instrumented
2016-10-04 10:25 pm UTC (link)
[Zero doesn't have to speak aloud that Ichiru is more than that. He makes a solid point, yes; one which Zero can't refute. There's more to his brother, though. He knows it's there within him.]

They already know I've forgiven you.

[He's said it before, right?]

They know I still love you, no matter the case. . . and I know how you'll respond to this with how could I even do such a thing. But I do. I've let go of things. Whether or not you want to accept that is up to you— no, I already know that you won't. Things happened the way they did. [And he wouldn't even change it.] We can't go back; there's no magical way to revert all that's happened. They know all of that, as well.

I know that you can't see it at all, but there's more to you.

[Self-hatred - something which Ichiru doesn't need to speak of for Zero to know is there - can be blinding. He's experienced it all too well, himself.

For him to accept, in the end, is settling.]

That's fine. You decided to show up, and to make even a small attempt, is already a step. I'm glad that you're at least doing that.

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-10-04 11:17 pm UTC (link)
[ No he doesn't. Ichiru understands silently that no matter what her said to Zero, his brother hasn't wavered once. He's well aware of that and he's making an effort to at least take those words into consideration. ]

I know you have. It still doesn't change the facts.

[ He adds but he'll drop it for now since he's not in the mood to argue with Zero about why he's forgiven Ichiru. ]

I'm quite aware that nothing will change. [ He doesn't regret it later as he keep sthat thought ot himself. They both know that as well. ] As long as they know. I have nothing else to say on the matter.

[ He only shakes his head. ]

It's hard to believe when you always feel like you've been abandoned.

[ It was below whisper but Zero can probably hear that. One day he'll finally get over it and he'll move forward. Like right now, he's making a little effort, something he won't normally do when he first came here. ]

Is it really that important?

[ No really. He can't believe it but it's not like he's going to run away this time. ]

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[info]instrumented
2016-10-05 03:34 am UTC (link)
[Dropping that part of the discussion is something he's fine with as well. They would most likely go in circles, much as they seem to do far too often.

And yet, just as well, he isn't sure exactly how to respond to the remark about being abandoned— Yes, he did hear it. However it cuts deep all the same. He can't put himself in Ichiru's shoes. Even for as much as he might have tried, their lives - and even their upbringing, to a degree - were (and have been) a stark contrast when compared. For as much as he hates it, there's nothing that Zero can say that will truly get to Ichiru.

Instead, his hand falls from Ichiru's wrist, only in order to not actually hurt him this time, when his fist tightens even further. So close to a white-knuckled grip.]

It's important to me. Does that make me selfish? [He ends up asking aloud.] Is it truly that difficult for you to at least give me even just a handful of minutes of your time. Am I not even worth that much to you?

[His jaw tenses for a moment, because he's not sure if it would be wise to continue along with that thought.

. . .But he does, in the end. Even though Ichiru already knows it.]

Sometimes it feels like you're not even here at all.

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[info]concealed_heart
2016-10-14 01:52 am UTC (link)
[ Exactly why it’s better for them to drop the topic altogether. They’ll only exhaust each other going in circles. It’s always been a struggle for him to not feel that way. Even when Ichiru found a place for himself, he was still always second best. It’s something that he’s gotten used to accepting but it honestly doesn’t stop the horrible words from coming out of his mouth. Whether it’s true or not, is irrelevant. It was just how he always felt and no one had really proved him otherwise, except Zero.

He’s quite aware of that even now. His brother had been and still is the person that continues to tug him along, making sure that there’s always a connection between them. Ichiru knows this all too well, but learning to accept is the challenge.

Selfish, he says. Ichiru had never once thought that Zero was selfish. He honestly wasn’t going to stomp on his brother’s happiness— something he really can achieve without Ichiru. It was as simple as that. His brother had moved along fine, and grew up, married and had kids. Who was he to ruin that? The thing he couldn’t stand was being asked to be part of something he didn’t want to be part of. Sure he understands that this is the only time these children would ever meet their dead uncle. That still doesn’t change the walls that he built around himself. There’s a long silence after Zero drops his grip. His hand falls limply to his side. ]

You’ve never been the selfish type. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be selfish. You deserve to be selfish. I’ve never once thought otherwise. I won’t destroy the happiness you built for yourself, but that doesn’t mean that I want to be part of it. I’m content if it’s just you.

[ He’s the selfish one. He doesn’t want to share and he never really had a say in everything that happened. He wants Zero to be happy. That’s at least something, despite how horrible he’s been to his brother, he truly did want his brother to obtain some sort of happiness with his passing. ]

Maybe it’s easier if you could see it that way. Unfortunately, we both know that it will never happen. I’ve learned to accept that. If you truly feel that way, then you shouldn’t go through such lengths to include me. I’ve already told you that you’ll only hurt yourself in the end but you don’t care either. You’ve always… been… the same even if you are different.

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[info]instrumented
2016-10-14 03:58 am UTC (link)
[Zero knows that his brother is right. Inherently so. Maybe not in regards to every last, small detail, but it's there. He hasn't simply moved on, though. Yes, he's accepted and came to terms with what ultimately transpired with Ichiru, and yes, he pursued and proclaimed to himself that he would do just as Ichiru wished for him to do, but that doesn't mean he's completely moved on from how close he holds him to his heart. Nothing can ever change that. Not Ichiru's behavior here, not the many, many years that would come to pass.

By now, there's nothing that Zero has gone without. Save only for his wishes for Ichiru to find even some small sliver of happiness. Even to be settled with himself. There are many reasons of why that hasn't happened (and maybe never will), though, and he knows there's no forcing it even in the slightest.

. . .so with that, he won't comment explicitly on the remark about being selfish.

He remains silent for another good few measures.]

Then. . . just this one time. Stay just once. After that—

[There's a faint smile that creases the corners of his eyes, yet all at once is only bittersweet at best.]

. . .After that, we can do dinner for just the two of us. We can cook together. Or to do whatever you might be interested in.

[It only matters that they're together. There's the ever-possibility that Ichiru could one day vanish from this place (just as there is for everyone). He wants to be able to take advantage of what time they do have while here.]

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