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M Y S T I Q U E (lottablue) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2013-08-06 14:51:00

Entry tags:

:4th wall, helix wamtani, raven darkholme, sam merlotte, spike, zelgadis greywars

[231] action/ silent network
[Computer Lab; action]

[What do you do when you're blue and in prison all of a sudden? You look for Erik, perhaps, to start but otherwise keep a keen ear listening for useful information. Though the network's full of squabbling human voices by the sounds of it, Mystique's taken to combing through it after settling in at the Computer Lab in Sector Two. Earpiece on she's reclining in a chair with her long legs crossed and propped up on a desk; not exactly giving off approachable vibes but what do you expect from a naked blue mutant?]

[Elsewhere; action]

[If computer labs aren't your thing then you'll have plenty of other opportunities to see Mystique a little later in the day, as hard as she is to miss. She'll be scoping out the perimeter of the dome and it's buildings and 'sights'. Not without something akin to a sneer at most of it, but a mutant's got to eat when a mutant's got to eat.]

[Network]

[If you think you've heard a subtle click listening in on feeds in silence, or noticed someone trying to pick into your stronger encryptions, then you'd indeed be right. Not exactly all that familiar with the tech yet, tracks aren't exactly covered as she sates curiosity throughout the day.]

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	_incurable 2013-08-10 05:11 pm UTC (link)
	I... [He doesn't know that, actually. Which is a really upsetting thing to realize.] Do you resent me? [That may be out of the blue, but he's tired of guessing about this, and that other Raven or whatever she was is making him question.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	andproud 2013-08-10 05:20 pm UTC (link)
	[At least she wouldn't unless she was really angry, in which case there would be other words to explain that point. But she blinks, obviously taken aback.] What? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2013-08-10 05:23 pm UTC (link)
	You know. [He makes an inarticulate gesture. Explaining feelings is complicated okay.] That fight we had. I want to be cured and you want to be accepted, I guess. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	andproud 2013-08-10 10:21 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, that. [It's a bitter memory, left untouched and ignored for a while.] We're different that way. You have hope, maybe you can go back to the way you were. [She scratches her cheek, eyes averted.] I was born this way. It's who I am. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

_incurable
2013-08-11 12:00 pm UTC (link)

[He doesn't love that answer, more for the way she said it than for the words themselves.]

It is different. If this was my fate instead of the random act of a crazed man, maybe I could accept it. But it's not.

And you're fine how you are. [He stumbles over his next sentence, trying to phrase it right.] Just because I want to cure myself doesn't mean I think there's anything wrong with you. You know that, don't you?

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andproud
2013-08-12 10:21 pm UTC (link)

[...] You made it...

You made it sound like you were disappointed. [In her, her choices, her wishes. In her when she told you about how she just wanted to be accepted, not to have to hide herself. Their fight was on a day where her emotions seemed to have a mind of their own, however, so she doesn't talk on past that point simply because she knows their disagreement was not entirely his fault. She played her part in it too.]

I don't resent you. I don't think we're the same, because we're not. But we know the same experiences, and if we want different things... I think that's okay.

[She hopes it is.]

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_incurable
2013-08-15 11:45 pm UTC (link)

Disapp-- [Gods, he did make it sound like that, didn't he? The whole thing is a blur of emotions that he's not good at untangling, but yes, maybe he was disappointed.] Maybe I was. But not because of that, because...

[He stumbles over his words for a minute, trying to find a way to put this.] I thought... I thought we did want the same thing, until that day. But I didn't understand you as well as I thought. That's why. [And yes, it was hard to hear. Which may explain why he was a giant sulky jerk.]

Of course, if you want to be accepted, if that will make you happy, then I want that too. But not for me. If I accept this, then it would be too easy to give up.

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	andproud 2013-08-22 08:22 pm UTC (link)
	So... you're not upset with me either? [She might've worried. Even though they'd talked, they'd laughed since, she did have her concerns.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2013-08-23 10:53 pm UTC (link)
	Of course not. I just -- [He clears his throat.] I just don't usually talk about things like this. Out loud. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	andproud 2013-08-26 12:49 am UTC (link)
	Me either. [Charles wasn't exactly an open ear.] I'm sorry for how things got... weird there for a bit. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

_incurable
2013-08-27 08:13 pm UTC (link)

[If it weren't for just seeing some older, bitter, caustic version of Raven, he might have brushed this off as he so often does when it comes to feelings-y stuff that he professes to be so bad at. The memory of that older Raven dismissing him lingers enough that he can't just let it go.]

[Gently, he steps forward and wraps his arms around her. Careful not to pinch her skin.]

Don't ever doubt that I -- that I care about you. Okay? Ever.

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andproud
2013-09-01 11:24 pm UTC (link)

[Her shoulders stiffen for a beat but then she relaxes, her arms gently lifting to wrap around him in return. Where he is careful and gentle not to harm her she is a little more forward, skin thickening so that she can give him a gentle squeeze she hopes he feels.

Her chin against his shoulder, she smiles over it.] Thank you, Zel. I care about you too, please doubt it either.

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_incurable
2013-09-02 08:05 pm UTC (link)

[He holds her just a little tighter, as much as he dares. He's felt her slipping away ever since he had to tell her he couldn't choose her over Saber. And it was the right choice, but he wishes it didn't have to be that way.]

You shouldn't. I was horrible to you. You deserve so much more than I can...

[He cuts himself off before he says things he shouldn't. That he never stopped feeling as strongly as he did that night they kissed in her apartment. It's not right for him to feel that way.]

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