[ she doesn't let go. she doesn't think she could, even if she wanted to. she's paralyzed on the spot, torn between two different needs and thoughts. don't let her go, her mind cries out, she'll vanish like the others. but then- she knows that's selfish. and she hates that, more than anything. she would never want to hurt homura. she would never want to hurt any of her friends.
she's so tired of all of this.
so what she really needs to figure out is this: does homura want to be left alone? will that hurt her less? and when she thinks that, despite everything that's happened in the past twenty-four hours, madoka can't bring herself to believe that that's the right choice.
"I've failed you."
because homura's hurting, too. homura's hurting so much worse than she ever could. that's what this is all about in the end, isn't it? she's been suffering alone all this time.
maybe it doesn't matter so much whether it's selfish, right now. what's important is letting homura know she's here. ]
Because I don't care if you're different. You're still my friend, Homura, and- and you always will be. I'll always think of you that way, no matter what happens.
[ she hopes, so hard, that her words will reach the other girl. she hopes that she's not making a huge mistake. she hopes that she's not just hurting the other girl even more.
but even if she is, some things need to be said. ]