InsaneJournal

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lily evans (ungilded) wrote in loremrpg,
@ 2011-04-11 04:08:00

Entry tags:

!incomplete, dorcas meadowes, hestia jones, kira fenwick, lily evans

Characters: Lily Evans, Kira Fenwick, Dorcas Meadowes, and Hestia Jones
Setting: Monday, October 11th, sixth floor, the secret room behind the bookshelf in classroom ten
Content: NSFW for foul language
Summary: Lily is crying and she needs her mates!

Lily had not been expecting James to break up with her over a journal entry on Monday when she opened her journal. She was expecting the usual talk of the ball, maybe James and Sirius sparring back and forth verbally against some Slytherin, showing that everything was sorted-but not this. When she read those words, his suggestion that they "cool things off", the first thing that happened to Lily was anger. She felt a swell of rage and responded accordingly, telling him precisely what she thought about his suggestion.

After her anger subsided, though, Lily was overcome with a wave of intense emotions, and she immediately began to cry. She knew she had to get out of the common room, so she grabbed her things in a hurry and ran, aimlessly, until her feet brought her to the secret room she and her mates had used for a sleepover more than once. She selected the correct book to open the bookcase and immediately closed it behind her, collapsing on the small, squashy purple sofa and not even bothering to light the fire. The room was fairly small and low-ceilinged, but there was a sofa, a pouffe, and an armchair, all purple with gold trim, as well as a small, simple fireplace. Just enough room, all told.

Lily just cried for several moments, arms wrapped tightly around herself, sobs wrenching her entire body. She felt nauseous, overcome with betrayal and hurt. Finally, after almost ten minutes of straight crying, Lily opened her journal to write an entry begging her mates to come help her, but then she was faced with a fresh wave of tears when she saw James' ward again. She forced herself to write the entry through it, then kept the journal sitting on her lap to respond to the inevitable questions as best she could. Lily was digging the nails of her right hand into her upper left arm hard enough to draw pinpricks of blood, body still shaking with silent sobs and tears streaming down her face as she sat staring through the journal rather than at it.

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kwick
2011-04-11 09:17 am UTC (link)

Immediately after reading the journal entry posted by Lily, Kira had written briefly to thank Sirius for his brilliance in botching things up for her best mate. Then, without further ado, she headed down to the familiar room Lily had mentioned in her journal. Kira was beyond at a loss. She remembered all too well how painful such things were. Rabastan had introduced her to such a world just last year, and seeing a mate go through it only managed to remind her how ridiculous boys were. They were far from worth anyone's time. Trying to shove any pent up hatred to the side so she could make herself available to her friend, Lily shoved the bookshelf aside and entered into the secret room on the 6th floor. Her eyes were immediately redirected to Lily, who was crumpled up on the floor as she held herself and sobbed.

Kira frowned, jogging over to Lily before collapsing on the floor beside her and wrapping her arms around the girl. She didn't need to say a word at that point. Even if she wanted to, she couldn't. Kira just held her tightly, one hand moving up to her head to try to pacify her easier. She hadn't realized until that point just how quickly Lily had fallen for James, and truthfully it made her hate herself all the more for encouraging the relationship to begin with, especially after the warnings on Benjy's behalf. "I'm here for you, Ginger. We'll get through this," she tried to encourage, continuing to rock with Lily as she held her, the tears soaking through her shirt.

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dorcasjmeadowes
2011-04-11 09:32 am UTC (link)

Out of all the things Dorcas thought James Potter was capable of, hurting Lily was not one of them. After pinning so hard for her in the past it seemed impossible that he would do this. After reading Lily's ward, Dorcas instantly feeling sick. Sick with worry, anger, shock and whatever emotions that subdued with those. After her weekend, she thought it would have taken at least a day for Dorcas' recent worries to catch up with her again. She had no clue that they would have returned this fast. After a week of worrying about her father, Arcas, Narcissa and a whole bunch of things that suddenly felt so far away now. Right now, all she was worrying about was her best mate.

Two weeks. Two weeks was all it took for James to stuff it up. Dorcas felt guilty. It was her, Kira and Hestia that had pushed her towards him. It was them who coaxed her into giving him a chance. Suddenly she started feeling like a right, daft cow. Why the hell was she always feeling sorry for everyone? She'd even stuffed up by asking Potter how he was. Not only that, she'd already thought of everybody's sides. She'd had first and most importantly sympathized with her best mate but her concerns then focused on Potter briefly. She couldn't help but think that if she was in James' situation, she would have done exactly the same thing. If it was Lily or Kira or any of her close mates in Sirius' situation, of course she would have done what Potter had. She'd do anything to make her mates happy.

Dorcas was picking up her pace, her worry growing as she pictured Lily bawling her eyes out - which she probably was. She practically flew down the stairs, and jogged down the corridor before reaching classroom ten. Dorcas wasn't sure why but she stopped in front of the door, hesitating. What the hell was she supposed to say? What could she possibly say that would make anything better? She cursed quickly before realizing she was being daft again and ran through the open door.

"Lil?" She called out, her voice wobbling with concern as she made her way into the secret room that was far too familiar. She found her friend sitting down next to Kira and immediately made her way towards them, picking the journal up and chucking it on the sofa. Lily didn't need to look at the wretched thing anymore. Dorcas quickly took a seat on the other side of Lily and joined Kira in the hug, not letting go until Lily decided she didn't need it.

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ungilded
2011-04-11 09:41 am UTC (link)

When she heard Kira come in, Lily set her journal to the side and immediately wrapped her arms around her mate. She balled her fists in the fabric of Kira's shirt and clung tightly, her upper arm grateful for the relieved pressure. For the moment, she was unable to speak, and merely continued to cry, her face buried in Kira's shoulder for now.

After a couple of moments hugging just Kira, Dorcas came in too, and Lily shifted so she was clinging to both of her best mates. She had become skilled at multiple-person hugs over the years, and she was glad of it, because at this moment, though she hated feeling so weak, Lily needed all the support she could get.

This hurt. Lily had been betrayed before, twice, and one of those betrayals was as fresh as last spring. She had told herself she would stay guarded, and yet she had obviously fallen hook, line, and sinker for James' lines. He clearly didn't care about her, not really-had never cared about her, and she had gone against her better judgment and gotten hurt again. She didn't blame her friends, she blamed herself entirely.

After a couple of minutes of sobbing on her mates, suddenly, Lily shoved them away. For a second it seemed abrupt, but then she conjured a bucket out of thin air and proceeded to be violently sick in it. The choking sobs and the overwhelming sense of betrayal had literally made her sick. Her head was pounding, her throat was raw, and her stomach was clearly a mess, but none of this was anything compared to the pain she felt in her heart.

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dorcasjmeadowes
2011-04-11 10:57 am UTC (link)

This was something entirely new to her. Kira had been broken by a bloke before, that was a fact, but Dorcas had never felt like this over a guy. Dorcas, as much as her sweetheart facade might suggest, never let blokes get the better of her and this was why. The only time she had seen Lily so vulnerable was last Spring and when she saw her that day, Dorcas made a promise to herself that she would never let anyone break her. And well, she kept it. She never let a guy pull her in deep enough to spiral in to a hole of despair, similar to what Lily's and she'd certainly never let her walls down around any of the blokes she found herself snogging. All in all, Dorcas hadn't been hurt like Lily had or Kira. Dorcas had no idea. Family issues, anything she could handle, but this? Being so broken over a guy? That she couldn't understand nor could she say anything that could shed any light on the very tricky situation.

Feeling so clueless, she sat there hugging Lily feeling like a useless friend. When Lily pulled away from Kira's and her arms she quickly glanced up at her and it just made her feel worse. Her eyes were red raw and her face was drained of any colour, and she wished she hadn't looked at her. Dorcas felt her eyes even water at the sight of her friend. She quickly glanced towards Kira's direction in hopes she could offer her wisdom in this situation. When Lily starting being sick she looked straight forward at the wall, rubbing her friend's back, terrified to look at her. Terrified because this was terrifying. No one should ever be in this state, ever. She continued staring at the wall, trying to stay strong for Lily's sake, feeling utterly useless. She hadn't paid any attention to Lily the past week, concentrating on Narcissa, Emme and Doc. She felt like a utterly shit friend. Dorcas continued rubbing her friend's back wondering how - and why - life could get like this.

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atyourbehest
2011-04-11 06:04 pm UTC (link)

The moment Hestia had seen Lily's journal entry, she stood bolt upright. How could James have done such a thing? Had she, Kira, and Dorcas been wrong about him this whole time? Hadn't they been the ones who had reassured Lily that James was more than the arrogant toerag? And even as she tried to understand the whole thing from James' perspective, she still felt a knot cloying in her stomach. Would she had done the same if she were in James' position?

Snap out of it, she mentally told herself. This had nothing to do with what she would do. This was Lily, her friend, who was upset. She hastily ran up the stairs, making sure to avoid the trick step on the fourth floor. Sure enough, as soon as she shifted the bookshelf, Dorcas, Kira, and Lily were wrapped in a group hug. Hestia sunk down to the floor and embraced her three friends fiercely, as if they would vanish any minute now. A heavy solid weight rested deep in her chest, as she gazed at Lily. There was a bundle of comforting words that she wanted to say to Lily to possibly assuage her hurt or make her smile, but those words failed her at that moment. Instead, she reached out to Lily and combed her fingers through her friend's red hair.

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kwick
2011-04-11 06:24 pm UTC (link)

For a brief second Kira was proud of the girls for rallying around Lily with so little said, but that moment was dashed once the redhead shoved them off. Kira couldn't quite make out her facial expressions because the room was mostly dark now that the bookshelf had closed behind them, so without much more thought Kira cast Lumos and set her wand down on the floor beside her. Before looking back to Lily, she caught the worried gaze Dorcas sent her way. It was that point she realized Lily had conjured a bucket from the air, and the pieces meshed together. This was likely why she shoved them off. Without further thought, Kira immediately reached for Lily's hair to pull it back from her face before she got sick. The smell alone was enough to make Kira nauseous, but she hid the response rather well for the most part. It pained her to see Lily so torn up over James, and even more so over the fact she hadn't been the voice of reason through it all. That was her job, wasn't it? Yet he and his mates had pulled a fast one over all of them, and now this was what remained. It didn't make much sense at all, particularly considering Kira never thought James could amount to such a dickhead. All the torture he'd taken on Lily's behalf over the years spoke volumes for him a few weeks ago, but now she couldn't even remember what was so great about the boy to begin with. Surely it wasn't anything that warranted this response. Kira hated to think it, but it appeared she'd led her mate down a dead end road.

As Dorcas ran a hand over Lily's back and Hestia continued to soothe her, Kira brushed the hair from her face to keep it from getting into the bucket. When it appeared Lily was finished, she reached for the container and set it to the side. Hopefully one of the others would think to cast a masking spell over the stench because her wand was currently illuminating the small space for them. "Lil?" Kira finally voiced quietly, unable to hide the concern on her face. It was more or less her way of saying 'are you okay?' without breaching the topic. It was obvious she wasn't. Tucking her hair behind her ears for her, Kira proceeded to rub her mate's exposed forearm once she spotted the breaks in her skin on her upper left arm. It was no doubt fresh and resulting from Lily's nails. Her eyes went wide before Kira grabbed at her wand again, holding it to Lily's broken skin. "Dor, Hes? You mind?" she voiced softly, motioning with her head toward the arm she was sitting near as she held up the light. With the hand that had been on Lily's forearm, Kira grabbed at her mate's left hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "You want to talk about it, Ginger?" She was attempting to be as calm as possible to allow her mate to get it all out. It was still fresh, that much was a given, but it was a completely necessary process on the step toward recovery and redeeming her strength.

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ungilded
2011-04-11 07:22 pm UTC (link)

When Lily emerged from being sick, her hands still clutched the side of the bucket, knuckles white. For a moment, she breathed heavily, eyes closed, trying to stop the world from spinning out of control. She was aware of her closest friends all around her, reassuring hands soothing her, holding her hair back, and she felt a rush of immense gratitude towards all of them. She took a deep breath and slumped back into a more normal seated position, setting the bucket on the floor next to her, eyes still closed.

She heard Kira ask Dorcas and Hestia something, but she wasn't really coherent enough to figure out just what that could be. For the moment, she just focused on her own breathing, trying to keep it steady and even, because at least that was something she could control in this situation.

When Kira took her hand, Lily squeezed it back, and at first didn't give an answer to the question. There was a moment of silence, and then she opened her eyes. The redness from her tears made the green stand out even more. "I can't believe I was so stupid to trust him. I knew better. And I don't know why I'm so upset." Even her voice sounded different, hoarse from sobbing and then being sick, and more than a little unsteady. Lily simply didn't feel like herself at all.

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