Now I'm going through changes, changes. Who: Torque and Patience (NPC) Where: His Place When: Early Morning What: Unexpected Visitors Warning: Language
Two days before, Torque had had to do what he certainly hadn't wanted to, hadn't expected he'd have to. He'd had to break off...whatever it had been with Lia. Upon reflection, he'd found that he'd taken a fledgling friendship, and it was, fledgling, already highs and lows, and fucked it up by throwing something else into the mix cause he'd been attracted to her. He honestly liked Lia, and had thought that since he was attracted to her, and that she clicked along great with Patience, that it was natural to fall into an actual relationship with the woman. Only, he found that it didn't work like he'd expected it to.
She had told him before, about her family, and how fucked up they'd all been, how she'd been the black sheep and all. After he'd divulged some of his past, the basics about his family, the barebones about how he felt about the Marines. But they didn't really know each other as well as he'd thought, he knew all too well that there was a good deal he hadn't told her about his life beyond the light (and occasional) anecdotes here and there about his buddies and him on leave.
He hadn't wanted to hurt her, certainly hadn't ever wanted to see tears in her eyes, again, because of him. The last time, it had been because he'd been torn between following his head and his heart, when it came to the Marines. This time being torn between his head and his heart was more specific, that this sudden jump from lack of responsibility, complete freedom (what the Marines would allow), to a set life and seeming nuclear family of his niece, Lia and himself, it left him feeling stalled and the beginning tendrils of suffocation. It was too much, too fast.
It didn't help, and he never told her, that part of his need to back off, to separate, was because the timid way she acted around him sometimes made him feel as if he could breathe wrong and break her. He didn't want to be the guy who broke her. Ending it then, with only a week's worth of anything beyond friendship between them, seemed like the smartest move. Delaying it, trying to tell himself that he could get over the feeling of being overwhelmed with invisible restrictions so suddenly, it would have only made it hurt worse for them both when it inevitably ended.
Ending it then hadn't been easy, but he'd been pleasantly surprised by the feeling of relief that came over him after he'd said his piece. Nowhere in his words did he blame her, it wasn't her fault, it really wasn't anybody's, even if he'd been the one to push the envelope physically. Nowhere did he claim it was a fault of hers, a fault in their friendship. Instead he'd been careful and calm, telling her that he couldn't be what she seemed to need, what she seemed to want, and he wanted her to find that, it just wouldn't be with him. That he wanted their friendship back, but would understand if she wanted nothing to do with him.
It sucked. Plainly. All around. But it had to be done.
Yesterday, Lux had showed up at his work, and Torque had labeled his life 'complicated.' Complicated he could handle, was trying to iron now to some lesser level of complication, while Patience watched The Jungle Book on the TV while they ate Cheerios. Torque was still pleased over his buddy showing up in Scarlet Oak, talking of sticking around, glad for a friend who'd fought by his side, and by whose side he'd fought. One of the men who were as close as brothers to him, despite their recent division with his leaving. With his exile.
Across the table from him, his niece looked over from the singing bear on screen and smiled at him, the first time she'd lightened up on her own, since her fussy behavior over the past few days. He hadn't told her about Lia, obviously, about what happened there, but she'd obviously picked up enough from his mood to know that it wasn't good. Soon he'd have to explain why her friend wasn't around as much, too much awkwardness between him and Lia for them to be around each other much for at least the time being, but he'd get to that when he got to it.
He'd scooped up their empty bowls and spoons, when they'd finished her favorite breakfast, heading over to drop them in the sink, when there was knocking at the front door. Considering how much he doubted it was Lia with coffee and bagels again, he was curious enough to set the bowls back down on the table and head straight to the door to answer it.
Who he knew was behind it, as soon as he caught scent of the individuals on the other side, was no one he'd remotely been expecting, and Torque immediately unlocked, unlatched and opened it to greet the two who were waiting.