Tobias Davidson (para_tu_amor) wrote in light_of_may, @ 2010-02-24 23:49:00 |
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Entry tags: | #solo, 2009-07-05 |
Straight through my heart
Who: Tobias Davidson, plus flashes of his wife Athena (NPC) and another random guy (NPC)
When: Around 2am or so
Where: Tobias' house / Whatever city Athena's in
What: Just because he can see where she is, doesn't mean he'll like what he sees
Tobias’ siblings had, on many occasions, told him he’d gotten “easy” powers. He didn’t hear thoughts like Selena or move objects like Carlos. He didn’t get visions every time he touched something, like Maria. If he wanted to, he could act like there was nothing special about him. Deny that itch in the back of his brain that told him where to go, where to look.
He could never explain to them what it felt like. His skill wasn’t obvious, wasn’t one that could be explained. But it was there, always, whispering to him.
Move fast enough and you can find her.
It’ll be different this time.
She wants you to find her. She just needs to see you and then she’ll come home.
Tobias laid back against his bed, head just missing the pillows, and he made no effort to make himself more comfortable. Jonathan was staying at a friend’s house tonight, having spent the day at the Liberty Inn, enjoying the festivities. Of course Tobias didn’t have the heart to go. Instead he spent the day indoors, him and his memories, trying to delay the inevitable search.
A cursory glance at the ceiling revealed two cracks he knew were there and a third, tiny one in the far corner. Athena would have wanted those fixed, the moment she saw them. And Tobias would have done just that, despite knowing nothing about home repair, despite how much it would cost them. If it would make Athena happy, he would have done anything for her. He still would, if she would only give him the chance to do so.
Athena… where are you?
His wedding band was a constant weight on his finger, and he never took it off, not even when he slept. He’d promised until he’d love her “until death do us part,” and he wasn’t dead yet. And, thanks to his powers, Tobias knew she wasn’t either. The itch was there in his mind again, stronger now that he was paying attention to it. In the dark of night, it was harder to convince himself that he should try to let her go. That he didn’t have to see where she was, that the brief glimpses he got would only tease him, more than help him find her.
Alone, in the bed they’d once shared, all Tobias could think about was her and how much he missed her warmth next to him as he slept, her smile when he came home from work, how happy they’d been together. One little peek at where she was, that’s all he needed. Just one. It didn’t mean he had to jump in the car and drive himself to the airport. He had more self control than that.
He hoped, anyway.
Holding his hand out in front of him, he focused on his wedding band, idly spinning it around on his finger. Over the last ten years he’d tried looking for her so much that he didn’t have much of a choice but to be in practice with his powers. All he needed was the determination, the desire to find something, and the proper focus, and he was all set.
In the space of a few heartbeats, Tobias could feel the connection between them reignite, like that moment when she’d walked into the practice room at the University of Michigan, the day they first met. He was 18 at the time, and so eager to earn a spot in the university’s choir. After seeing her, the brief conversation that followed, he was determined to find out more about the woman as well. These feelings always bubbled to the surface whenever he looked for her, and in spite of himself, Tobias allowed himself a smile.
All he got, all he ever saw, were flashes. Like a bird’s eye view of the landscape around her, and it wasn’t like he could force her to turn her head and show him details of the area. Right now, Athena was in a city, cars rushing by her as she stood on the street corner. The streetlight was flickering, keeping him from seeing her face clearly. That was usual for him, the one thing he wanted to see the most, his wife’s smile, was more often than not kept hidden from him.
Tobias wondered if she still smiled without him.
Sometimes he could catch other details about the setting – the temperature, scents in the air. It was humid here, the kind that made clothes stick to your skin whenever you stepped outside. Though his house had central air, Tobias could still feel it, as much as if he was standing next to her on the street.
A car pulled up to the corner and flashed its lights. Athena leaned over, brown hair spilling over her shoulder. There was nothing inappropriate about her state of dress – well fitting jeans, a v-neck tank, purse slung over her shoulder. Tobias loved the simplicity of it, and for a moment he just watched her instead of taking in the scenery around her, instead of trying to figure out what city she was in. The sign attached to the streetlight said, “5th Avenue.” It could have been any city.
The window rolled down, and Tobias could see a man leaning over into the passenger’s seat. A young man, younger than himself, with dark hair cropped close to his head. Hispanic, too, from the looks of it. He could have been my baby brother. “You need a ride somewhere, honey?”
Tobias’ blood froze. She didn’t look like a hooker, so what gave this guy the right to talk to his wife like that? He wasn’t a possessive man, per se, and it wasn’t like he could do anything about it from his bed in Scarlet Oak. Right now he was just a voyeur with no idea of where his wife even was, much less what was going on in her life.
Athena, in response, just smiled. Her hair was in her face so he couldn’t see the full expression, couldn’t tell if it was real or if she was just faking it. “Car broke down, about two blocks that way.” She pointed, off to the west. “My phone’s not working either, might there be a place a little ways up the road with a payphone? I’m not from around here, so I’m not sure where everything is.”
Now, Tobias could get a better look at the man, at the grin he shot Athena. His Athena. “There’s a bar not too far from here. Get in, maybe I’ll even get you a drink.”
He wanted so badly to see her eyes as she stepped into the car. Everything in him was screaming for her not to do it, that she was supposed to come home to him, the husband who vowed he’d spend the rest of his life with her. Not some kid who offered her a ride. But she couldn’t hear him, though he tried to talk to her all the time through these visions, as if it was going to make a difference.
“Athena,” Tobias said, unaware that the words were said out loud, and not just in his head. “Please, mi amor, don’t do this. Te amo, te amo.”
And that was the exact moment the connection ended. The next thing Tobias was aware of was the feel of his comforter under his face; somehow he rolled over in this process, so he was laying on his stomach instead of his back. Athena, even the vision of her getting into a car with a stranger, was gone, and he was alone.
Alone, like he always was. In his empty bed, in his empty house.
In spite of everything, he never let himself consider the impossible – that she’d moved on. That she’d left because she didn’t want him anymore. But how could that be – she’d promised to love him forever, and they had two children together. Jonathan, who was growing up to be a fine young man in spite of Tobias’ flaws, and the child Tobias knew nothing about. He refused to believe that in one afternoon, she could go from blissfully in love to running away from all of it. It just didn’t make any sense to him. Tobias, try as he might, couldn’t find anything that might have warned him of such an outcome.
Maybe everyone was right. Athena didn’t want to be found, and he was putting himself through this for nothing. But he couldn’t let her go. Even though it had been ten years since he last held her in his arms, murmuring the same words into her ear he was saying out loud now: “Te amo, te amo. Para siempre.”
He’d never stop looking for her. If only for the chance to say those words to her once again.