sam evans ( werewolf ) . (tamest) wrote in light_of_may, |
It was never Sam's intention to upset Jo, the mere thought of doing such a thing would have filled him with shame and regret and it was entirely possible he would never stop apologising. Maybe it was for the best he hadn't realised. Sam hardly needed help feeling the way he did, it was something of a default state for him, ignorant as he was to the fact, just as he was ignorant to just how much his own behaviour and mentality affected others. Even though he heard Jo's words and the pain in them it didn't click as it would for others that he was the cause of that. All he knew was that she was upset and the wolf in him, sympathetic and highly attuned creature that it was, picked up on that as easily as if it was physically tangible.
Soft though it might have been it was easy enough for him to recognise it as an order, a command from a dominant wolf to a submissive, and all but immediately he stilled and quieted. Jo wanted him to stop and so he would, she had asked it of him directly even if not loudly and it was in his nature to obey. It was followed soon enough by another and as much as it went against his instinct he obeyed that one as well, lowering his arms from the back of his head and lifting his face just enough to do as she asked, looking at her as she spoke to him. His stomach tightened with a familiar kind of anxiety as he met her gaze, swallowing against the firm lump that had formed in his throat. Ultimately, no matter how much Jo wanted him to look at her, Sam couldn't keep his eyes on hers and it was only a few seconds before he lowered his gaze to her knees instead.
With a small sound like a whine in the base of his throat Sam remained in place, otherwise silent for the better part of a minute before saying anything at all. When he did speak it was quietly that he did so. "I don't--" Another swallow, his voice even quieter when he went on, "You're not like that." Another brief meeting of her gaze with his own. "You're not a monster." That much had been very clear, very plain, from the beginning. Sam had never thought of Jo that way and he believed with all his heart and soul that he never would.