InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "NO. You can has veggetables."

Adam Pucey (adampucey) wrote in landing_rpg,
@ 2009-07-07 01:39:00

WHO. Adam & Evan Pucey, eventually Jessica Vaisey
WHAT. A chance encounter
WHERE. Outside an elite party.
WHEN. Night time
RATING. Probably high for language.
STATUS. Incomplete / Closed

It was a chilly January night. The breeze outside was crisp and cool, staining one Adam Pucey's cheeks pink as the boy made his way from an apparition point, towards a majestic house that stood proud and tall atop a hill not too far from where he was. He slumped back against the tall tree overlooking the land and ran a cold hand over his face, his position affording him a view of the grounds of what appeared to be an elite function. People were apparating in on one side, he house lit brightly from the inside. It almost appeared like a scene from a dream...

Adam fished a cigarette from his pocket and lit it with his wand. He wore a simple polo shit and dark jeans combo, a cloak shrugged on and boots covering his feet- certainly not the attire one would choose for the events that were to transpire within the great house. He took a drag an exhaled deeply. His hands were shaking, he noted candidly for he hadn't quite noticed before. In his pocket was an invitation to the said event, but he knew it was perhaps a mistake that he was sent one, for it was addressed to the Pucey family as a whole. In the past years, he's attended these funtions. Mingled with the right people, made business arrangements with some. It was hs job for the past few years of his life. But now, he was forcefully relieved of those duties because... of the path he'd chosen to take. Surely, he would be unwelcomed if he showed his face.

Still, he was there. Why? Perhaps a part of him wanted to see his family, wanted to see that they were alright despite his absence. He had done the very same during New Year's, where he stood outside his family's home until it was mere minutes until midnight, just wanting to see them, but afraid to be seen by them. After, he retreated back to his home, where Wesly had patiently waited for him. Now, his eyes looked at the fingers holding up his fag, a ring gleaming in one of his fingers. He couldn't help but smile a little at the thought of his Westly. It gave him comfort to kow he'll be waiting for him when this was over...

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adampucey
2009-07-07 02:50 am UTC (link)

Adam had done quite a few mistakes in his life. It's something he would now openly admit to, if asked. But all the steps he had taken until that point were ones he couldn't find himself to regert, not when they have made him so happy. Not when they have led him to the one person who loved him for who he was, no matter what that meant...

He bowed when he heard Evan speak. The anger was still in his tone, clear and distinct. "I'm sorry." he said, though it would sound as if he wasn't simpley apologizing for that one issue alone. "Is that why you're here?" he asked, taking a drag, before throwing the butt on the ground and shuffling the rocks under his feet with his boots. "It's not even midnight and already, they've gotten to you." He said, though not cruelly. He was merely making an observation. "The people in there. They can say some pretty awful things that can wound you. But you shouldn't let them...

"Father's proud of you." he said. He had caught a glimpse of his old man by he front doors. "He would not have placed you in this position if he did not know you could handle yourself. That's what matters." he swallowed, running a hand through his hair. "And I know this may not mean much to you... but I've never been more proud of you either."

A sigh escaped his lips. His hands were still shaking, a distraction obviously needed. He fished the pack of fags from his pocket, placed one between his lips before raising it for Evan to see. "Want one?"

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evanpucey
2009-07-07 04:58 pm UTC (link)

"I just needed some air," Evan said defensively. Who was Adam to judge him on how well he handled things when he had completely given up everything he'd worked for in the blink of an eye? "I'm not wounded, and they don't have bad things to say about me. It's you they seem unable to shut up about." Adam this. Adam that. How do you feel about Adam leaving, Evan? It must be hard for you that Adam's gone, Evan. Adam, Adam, Adam. The one thing Evan desperately wanted to avoid talking about was on everyone's lips all the bloody time!

Evan tensed at the mention of their father, a man Evan strove so hard to impress, to gain the approval of. Adam had been his father's golden boy, and now he was gone, and Evan could swear that his father knew, each time he looked at him, that Evan would never measure up. "I don't need you to be proud of me," he muttered bitterly.

He had half a mind to refuse the cigarette. Merlin knew he wasn't comfortable taking a smoke break with his estranged brother. But his desperation for something to calm his nerves apparently won over his discomfort with the situation in general, and he reached forward to take one of the fags. But it was as he was plucking it from the case that he noticed something glinting on Adam's finger. A ring? As in a wedding band? Evan almost dropped the cigarette- almost. It was clearly going to be extremely valuable in about five seconds. "What the fuck is that?" he demanded, a finger pointing accusingly at the grey and black band.

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adampucey
2009-07-07 05:13 pm UTC (link)

Adam heaved a heavy sigh. It seemed no matter how deeply he inhaled or exhaled, there seemed to be a weight pressing down his chest. No matter how he told himself his younger brother's words shouldn't hurt, for he still blindly believed he loved him in some degree, they still did. But he understood his anger, he has spent most of the last few months trying to accept it. "Did you not expect it?" he asked, his voice gentle, then let out a bitter laugh. He new these elit folks, how they talked and how they acted. "You'd think I died with the way they probably talk about me now..."

Of course, Evan would tell him he didn't need his approval. It was expected, however it didn't lessen the hurt one bit. Adam's expression remained neutral but rather humble. "I know." he said. "But I still am. You've grown up. One of my regrets is not being able to see it happen..."

Watching Evan in his periphery, he noted the sudden tensing of his shoulders. He turned his head to look at him, then followed the line of his sight to his hand. "It's a ring." he said almost tonelessly, taking his proffered hand back and pocketing his fags. He lit the cigarette up and settled back against the tree, his eyes not leaving Evan. "Or is that not the answer you wanted?"

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evanpucey
2009-07-07 05:26 pm UTC (link)

"Yeah, well, it would've been a hell of a lot easier if you had done that instead," Evan snapped. Evan honestly believed it would have saved him grief. It certainly wouldn't have dragged the Pucey name down through the mud. It would have been so much easier to lose someone like that, than to have them willingly walk away.

Evan scoffed at his words. "Yeah, well, take comfort in knowing you can watch your lover grow up instead." Which, yes, did reveal just how much Evan felt he and his family had been replaced.

"I know it's a stupid ring," he exclaimed. "What the hell is it doing on your ring finger?!" It had never crossed his mind that it might be Westly's ring. It appeared to him that he had run off and married someone else, making his entire flight from the family seem completely unncessary. Had he really already given up on Westly? Was that why he was back here? Had he come to tell them he had changed his ways and had married a nice pureblooded woman in hopes of clearing the family name?

Looking back, Evan would realize it was unbelivably foolish to let such hopes creep into his heart, but staring wide-eyed at his brother, he couldn't help but hope that maybe, just maybe he had changed his mind. Maybe, just maybe, he was coming back.

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adampucey
2009-07-07 06:17 pm UTC (link)

Adam almost forgot to breath when his brother practically told him he would rather that he had died. Despite knowing his little brother's tendency to overreact when he was angry and say things he probably did not mean, Adam couldn't hide the hurt- the horror- that reflected in his expression. He looked away, eyebrows drawn together, not wishing the other to see him. "I hadn't meant for you to see me." he told him. "I would hide myself from you if I knew it was what you wanted. Not much would change for me or you, would it?"

Another long sigh escaped parted lips. He could tell how much the other resented him, how angry he was at him for choosing this path. He still didn't understand that if he could have both, he would... "Now, why would I ever take comfort from the fact that I can't see my brother when I want to? That I can't talk to him? Can't be there for him in his highest highs, or his lowest lows?" he swallowed. "How can I be happy knowing that?"

His heart broke at the other's expression when he had seen the ring. Instantly, he understood what he thought, and for a second, was tempted to give in... just so he could feel for a second that his brother loved him again. But he couldn't. Lying would only make him hate him more inthe long run. "It's a commitment band." he told him, watching him closely. Breathing seemed harder to do at that point. "An identical one rests on Westly's finger." he told him. "It's not an engagement. But..." he paused, closing his mouth before he looked down and taking a drag. Maybe it wasn't the wisest idea to go on...

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evanpucey
2009-07-07 06:18 pm UTC (link)

Evan couldn’t help but feel a twinge somewhere in his stomach at his brother’s expression. He looked horrified, crushed, destroyed. For a moment, he almost wanted to take it back. He almost wanted to apologize to him and say he hadn’t meant what he had said, but he knew it was not only too late to do so, but that he had meant it. It would have been easier. He wouldn’t have felt so betrayed. He wouldn’t have to deal with knowing every day his brother was still out there, but was no longer his brother. He was someone else, and his brother was never going to come back. “What good does it do me to see you?” he muttered after a moment’s pause.

“I don’t know, Adam. Obviously happy enough that you did what you did. You’re obviously happy enough to miss all the so-called highlights of my life. You’re gone, in case you hadn’t noticed. You picked him over us, remember? You made a choice. You left.” And Evan was certain he would never be able to forgive him for it.

Evan felt sick, physically ill, as the words left Adam’s mouth. A commitment band. He was making the commitment to be with him for the rest of their lives, ‘not an engagement, but’ it was coming soon. Evan could finish the sentence without any help of Adam’s. The cigarette in his hand finally slipped through his trembling fingers, which in disgust with himself, he quickly clenched into a fist. “Of course,” he ground out. A marriage would make the damage permanent. There would be no turning back. There would be no chance of reconciliation. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with Westly Nott, and that meant he wanted to spend it apart from the Pucey family, away from Evan.

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adampucey
2009-07-07 06:24 pm UTC (link)

Adam gave a bitter laugh at the words that came next. The absense of remorse only proved how much the other meant what he'd said. He still had not recovered from it all when he spoke. "Nothing." he said, crushed that his own blood would hate him so. "The only one who benefits from it... is me." He ran a cold hand through his hair, leaving them in casual disarray. "I like seeing you, even though I know fully well that you feel the opposite towards me." he admitted. "I like knowing you're healthy and alive. I like seeing you take care of mother and father, Anna and Peyton. Why... did you think I came here tonight in the first place?"

"I'm not gone." Adam told him, his tone reflecting his exhaustion. "I'm here, aren't I?" Suddenly not in the mood to smoke, he flicked his cigarette to the ground and crushed it with his boot. "And you know fully well I didn't leave. I was pushed away. Don't you think I would have stayed if I could stand by family and keep Westly by my side?"

The anger in Evan seemed to almost emanate from his very person, a strong energy that repelled him and warned him to keep his distance. "I'm not going to change." he said in an almost whisper. It hurt that he had to tell Evan these things. He still seemed to be in some form of denial. "I love him with every fiber of what I am. I plan to be with him for as long as I can breathe in air into my lungs. And I'll marry him one day and spend the rest of my life making sure that he's happy and that no one will hurt him the way his family has." His chest felt as if it was going to burst, but he kept strong and went on. "I'm happy. Can't you ever find it in yourself to be happy for me, too?"

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evanpucey
2009-07-07 06:44 pm UTC (link)

"No."

It was a single word, but it's presence was powerful and final, and Evan was almost caught offguard by the strength behind it as he stared down his older brother, a man he had once looked up to so much. He would never be happy for his brother, not after he had left, not after his decisions.

"I will never be happy for you and Westly." The boy's name came out of his mouth like venom, spat to the ground. "You blame our father for your situation, but you have no one to blame but yourself. You 'love him with every fiber of your being'," It was clear that Evan found this notion ridiculous. "And have left nothing for your family. You were given a choice, and you made your decision because of a ridiculous infatuation that you've convinced yourself is going to last you a lifetime. You've given up the people who birthed you, raised you, loved and cared for you for seventeen years before you even so much as glanced at this stupid boy you've decided you're going to marry.

I deluded myself into thinking you'd change your mind, you know. A part of me honestly believed you'd come back to our family, and I'd have my brother back. I've realized now," He laughed bitterly. "Even when this romance of yours ends, even if you come crawling back on your hands and knees, I won't want you back. You aren't my brother. Not anymore."

Even with the firmness of his words, Evan could feel the sharp pain building in his chest, burning to the point that it was difficult to breathe, but Evan was nothing if not talented at appearing much more thick-skinned than he was. He finally averted his gaze from his brother's to start the journey back to the castle, his fancy shoes crushing the unlit cigarette that had fallen, pressing it down into the snow.

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adampucey
2009-07-07 07:08 pm UTC (link)

Adam had felt the force that powered that single syllable. Again, it lashed at him, left an open wound along with the others Evan had inflicted on him with his tactlessness and carelessly delivered lines. He doubted if he could stand on his own if not for the tree that supported his weight.

The words left him in excruciating pain, but almost too quickly, he felt numbness filling him. Evan's words weren't new concepts to him. In his months of solitude, he had already thought of the worst things Evan could sayto him if they were ever to meet. Hearing them in person hurt. But he deserved everything, and he knew this; he was not going to flee, but stand his ground and take whatever was thrown at him.

"Then so be it." Adam said, far too calm, his walls lifting up around him when they obviously hadn't been there before. "From this day forth, you're no longer my brother, Evan." he told him, even though he struggled to keep his voice steady. It was difficult when all he wanted to do was cross the lawn to his little brother and pull him in his arms. "Don't worry. I won't come back to a home I'm not welcome in. I wouldn'be able tostomach it anyway, knowing my happiness is ridiculed and valued at so little a price..."

Adam stood in silence as he watched him go. "Goodbye, Evan." he said, but this time his voice faltered, and before he could fall apart, he apparated back home.

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