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beholder_mod (beholder_mod) wrote in hp_beholder,
@ 2008-04-28 15:10:00

Entry tags:

aberforth dumbledore, augusta longbottom, fic, frank longbottom sr, het, minerva mcgonagall, petunia dursley, vernon dursley

FIC: 'All Things Right and Proper' for lyras
Recipient: lyras
Author: donnaimmaculata
Title: All Things Right and Proper
Rating: R for darkish themes, language, some sexual contents and allusions to drug abuse
Pairings: Petunia Dursley/Vernon Dursley, Augusta Longbottom/Frank Longbottom Sr., Minerva McGonagall/Aberforth Dumbledore
Word Count: 24,700
Warnings: Vernon Dursley as a lust object. Yeah, I know.
Summary: During the Dark Lord's rise to power, three women struggle for their families, their love and their lives. Or, in less summer-blockbuster-y words: Glimpses into the lives of Petunia, Minerva and Augusta during the events of The Deathly Hallows
Author's Notes: Lyras, you asked for character studies, women kicking ass, plot, characters who aren't black or white, 'fade to black' rather than PWP, UST, working around canon, angst with hope. I tried to squeeze in as many of your requests as possible. Hope you enjoy!
Bonus points for everyone who spots the obscure crossover.

***
Click here to read 'All Things Right and Proper'

Don't forget to return to this post to leave feedback for the author!

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lyras
2008-04-28 10:14 pm UTC (link)

Firstly, mystery author, you should know that I squeed when I read the summary and pairings. Thank you so much for meeting so many of my requests :). And I'm very glad I got up early this morning, so I could read this before work took over.

Secondly, I predict that this review is going to be very long, very jumbled and very happy!

I love the beginning - so Petunia, but with a bitter note that we rarely get to see in canon. And Dedalus's wittering is just perfect for him. I love our initial view of Dudley here, the way he can calm Petunia's panic. And the reminder that they're in an absolutely terrifying situation, with no idea of what the future will bring.

The first scene with Minerva is dully evocative, if I can say that, and perfect for her mood. And I so heart your Augusta, arming herself for her day/visit to St Mungo's. This is a wonderful introduction to all three women.

It was the brush with magic that had changed her son, just as it had changed her sister, all those years back. And while she herself had been so fortunate as to escape the madness of the magical world before, she was now being dragged right into it, and her husband and her son were being dragged with her.

This sums up so many of my thoughts about Petunia and why she's so bitter about magic. And ahhh, I love her initial perception of Minerva.

Re obscure crossover: is the drunk the father from Shameless? :D

Oh, gosh, I love so many of the details. Minerva's bewildered opinion of the Dursleys, the comparison between Petunia and Lily, Albus the White and Aberforth the Grey (*channels Gandalf*), the quiet conversation between Minerva and Aberforth...

Augusta searching for her husband in her son's face - lovely. And I love that you keep the image of the family snuggling up together to "special occasions"; it underlines the distance in the family.

Your vision of the Dursleys and their reactions to their exile is so similar to mine. I can completely see Vernon staring into space and Dudley taking refuge in his weights.

I lovelovelove the way you're setting up the Dursleys' relationship. Petunia's sudden surge of affection and desire is completely plausible, and oh, "This is all your fault..." makes me ache for her.

"It would be a disaster for this school if we lost you."

This is a lovely portrayal of Severus so far. To the reader, it's clear that he's walking a fine line; to Minerva, not so much.

"Professor Minerva"! ♥ Also, you've really got inside Aberforth's character here.

Augusta Longbottom didn't approve of that attitude.

No, I can imagine she wouldn't. *g* I love Augusta carrying on with her life as if nothing had changed.

"...He's turned out well," she added proudly. "Just like his father before him. And his father before him."

*wells up with tears and hearts you* And woo, so much love for the conversation between Augusta and Algie, and the sudden explosion of emotion.

when the delinquent children from next door (she had not yet found out how many there were

It is Shameless! *hearts you more than ever* Also, hee, Dudley!

Ahhh, more emotional explosions. Clearly this is a kink I should be requesting more often. Your characterisation is simply brilliant here - Petunia, Dudley, Vernon...The sex is most believable (and a little sad) as well.

Love the confrontation between Minerva and Vernon, Vernon and Dudley, and then the slight entente between Minerva and Petunia. Perfect. And ahaha, Minerva going all professory on Dudley!

I really don't want to stop, but my boyfriend is about to get up and I need to start work. So I'll post this part of my review and get to the rest as soon as I can!

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(Anonymous)
2008-04-28 11:05 pm UTC (link)

Thank you so much for the best review ever :-D

I am so thrilled that you liked it. I enjoyed writing it immensely and it's so gratifying to see that I met your taste. And that you find the silly little things funny with which I was cracking myself up whilst writing ("Aberforth the Grey"...) (The crossover is Shameless. I'm so happy that you're familiar with the show - although I was trying to keep it subtle so that you don't miss out anything if you aren't.)

I was actually hoping I would get to write Petunia for this exchange, and so your request had made me quite happy. And then I decided to throw in Minerva, too, and Augusta for good measure (because three is a good number for witches). It was only after I had finished the fic that I came across an older post of yours in which you were discussing how much you like Augusta, so my complete stab in the dark had proved lucky.

And even though you didn't have anything to do with the assignment: Thank you for providing me with a request that resulted in so much fun writing!

The greatest challenge was, of course, to write Vernon as sexy.

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lyras
2008-04-29 04:49 am UTC (link)

I have rambled a bit about this story here :).

Seriously, you couldn't have picked three/four better characters to work with as far as I'm concerned.

Your Vernon was terrifyingly true to canon :D. I loved what you did with all the Dursleys - the fact that, for example, even near the end, when Petunia has shown signs of character development, she's still faffing around trying to serve tea for everyone and cleaning manically. Dudley, of course, gets a real bit of character development, and that's lovely to see. But I think it's sort of right that Vernon never changes. Because you just know he won't! And yet you still made Petunia's attraction to him plausible.

*stops rambling*

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(Anonymous)
2008-04-29 03:38 pm UTC (link)

Thank you very much for reccing :-) I'm thrilled - thrilled! - that you liked it so much.

when Petunia has shown signs of character development, she's still faffing around trying to serve tea for everyone and cleaning manically

I've been thinking, actually, that none of these characters really changes all that much. Even in canon, they're pretty much set in their ways, and I was trying to convey that even though these people are fighting against a common enemy, what they are really fighting for is the preservation of their way of life. They don't seriously try to understand and get along with the others, they merely want everything back to normal. For example, when putting down my very first notes for this fic, I wasn't sure yet where I would be going with Petunia and Vernon. The basic concept was: Minerva and Aberforth - new love; Augusta and Frank Sen. - lost love; Petunia and Vernon - established relationship, and I was considering having Petunia leave Vernon, because she experiences character development and growth and he doesn't. But I abandoned that pretty quickly, because I didn't think that Petunia would leave everything behind. She likes her middle-class life and its order and she wants it all back.

Vernon, of course, never had the least chance to grow, the poor man.

See me ramble about my own fic... But I simply couldn't leave your lovely comments uncommented.

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lyras
2008-05-15 11:48 am UTC (link)

I couldn't reply to this earlier because I had things to say about the Dursleys that might have given away my own story. But yes, I went through the same process of considering whether Petunia might leave Vernon and deciding that, for now, she wouldn't.

She likes her middle-class life and its order and she wants it all back.

And this is precisely why. Just another example of how you hit my thoughts dead on with this story :).

And you're quite right, of course, that most of the characters don't really change, and that's partly why I love them - they're curmudgeonly and set in their ways! But they're also fundamentally nice (well, except for Vernon; perhaps well-intentioned would be a better word than nice), and it was lovely to see them all brought together here.

Thank you again!

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donnaimmaculata
2008-05-15 02:16 pm UTC (link)

Yes, I found it very amusing to see after the reveals that I have written a Petunia that was similar to your Petunia.

Well-intentioned is very well put. The great thing about the HP characters (most of them - maybe except of those who are downright evil) is that they are convinced they're doing the right thing and, at the same time, are blessed with the incapability of seeing and understanding a different point of view.

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