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atdelphi (atdelphi) wrote in hp_beholder,
@ 2014-05-13 15:31:00

Entry tags:

aberforth dumbledore, aberforth dumbledore/severus snape, beholder 2014, fic, rated:pg-13, severus snape, slash

FIC: "Elegy for a Goat" for pauraque
Recipient: pauraque
Author/Artist: ???
Title: Elegy for a Goat
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Severus/Aberforth, background hint of Aberforth/Albus
Word Count: 17,460
Medium: Fic
Warnings/Content Information (Highlight to View): None.
Summary: Ab has never been fond of his brother's protégés, but he's always had a weakness for goats. He's not sure what to make of Severus Snape.
Author's/Artist's Notes: Thanks beyond measure to Delphi, who is the most encouraging and kindest of mods and has more patience than a thousand saints put together.

Elegy for a Goat

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pauraque
2014-05-14 04:32 pm UTC (link)

Holy..! This is tremendous. Thank you so much for writing this for me.

Your writing style is so striking that I feel like I should know who you are, but somehow I can't put my finger on it. Your words have such precision and delicate detail. It reminds me of Durer's engravings, the ones where you find yourself looking really closely because you just can't believe how many tiny little lines there are.

Your Aberforth is so rich and fully realized, it's a pleasure being in his head. Just everything about him -- his roughness, but also his wit and his particularness about calling things by the right name. He's analytical and likes to see things square-on. I love the connection he has with his animals, more matter-of-fact than affectionate, but he understands them and respects them for what they are. The analogy you've drawn between that and his feelings about Severus is inspired.

I love what you did with the Albus/Aberforth relationship. I think it's perfect for them, that there was something there, but nothing that could be quite pinned down and labeled. That's exactly how I see them.

The story flows wonderfully, with the gradual increase in tension paralleling Voldemort's rise. I absolutely love the messiness of Aberforth and Severus's relationship, fraught with so many misunderstandings, and things that perhaps can't ever be fully understood. Ab is a sharp observer of Severus as he changes over the years, yet the barriers between them are constantly reinforced by things in the world that neither of them can control -- most of all, by Albus.

The cathartic moment when Severus literally bares himself to Aberforth is daringly theatrical, and it *works*. I hope this isn't going too far, but it's actually a little Shakespearean in my opinion. It's the sort of scene he'd write. Very symbolic and mythic-feeling, underpinned by a deeply complicated relationship between the characters. Severus's story, too, has a feel of classical tragedy to it, as he drives inevitably towards what we know will be his death. I love that his eyes are open to that, that he sees it coming and he's *angry* about it, but his fate, as he sees it, is already written.

I really want to thank you for writing something so thoughtfully tailored to the most important of my likes, which isn't a character or a pairing or a kink, but a *story* with all the complexity and uncertainty and fear and hope of real people's minds and hearts. Not every writer can pull that off, but it's what I'm hoping for every time I read a fic, and I got it here.

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perverse_idyll
2014-05-23 07:24 am UTC (link)

I practically punched the air in delight when I saw this comment. Our long-suffering and supportive mod will attest to the fact that I fretted over getting this right because I have such a high regard for your work. I'm so relieved that the details are persuasive and the complexity true to the characters. Above all things, I like exploring thorny relationships, and you can't get much thornier than the ones between the brothers Dumbledore or between Albus and his reformed Death Eater. The crosscurrents of love and betrayal, admiration and subservience carry all of them inescapably forward, and I think Severus especially is more overrun by Albus' past choices and unfinished business than he ever realizes, considering he has his own guilt to sweep him downstream. (By the way, Albus was meant at first to be an onstage character throughout the story, but Aberforth was having none of it. He's better at dealing with Albus from a distance, and in this case so was I.)

You've caught everything I hoped would shine through, and it's such a pleasure knowing you enjoyed my interpretation of Ab's character. He's so distinct from Albus, but I wanted him to have a Dumbledore-ish quality nonetheless. The old scar they share between them is never going to fade, which makes the two of them in their old age rather poignant. No final reconciliations.

You've also laid my mind to rest about that scene with Severus. I knew I wanted it in the fic, and I was building toward it quite consciously, but for various reasons this was a very difficult story for me to write and the last third suffers from a full-scale last-minute gallop. I was worried that I hadn't prepared the moment properly and that it would fail to connect with readers, or would seem overblown. Thank you for singling it out so I can stop fussing over it. I also wanted to be clear that Severus wasn't actually eager to die, as he'd been after Lily's death, but that he feels he has no choice. I think that knowledge heightens the tragedy, because it means he's not even allowed to hope and must face death fully aware of the waste of everything he might have been or done. He has, in essence, destroyed himself, and there's really no getting around it. And the fact that you compared Severus' physical revelation to a Shakespearean effect absolutely bowls me over. There is no higher praise.

This is everything I could have wished to hear while working on the story. I'm so glad it appealed to your love of complicated, imperfect characters, because I love them, too, and they kept me company for weeks while I figured out how to coax them toward the ending. Thank you so much. I'm overjoyed by your response.

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	perverse_idyll 2014-05-23 07:27 am UTC (link)
	I should add, although it's obvious by now - yes, evensong14 was a sock. embarrassed (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

pauraque
2014-05-23 01:38 pm UTC (link)

Oh! You fooled me. It all makes sense now. I felt a little silly having said the writing seemed familiar and then "finding out" it was someone I'd never heard of! *g*

I hesitated to bring up Shakespeare because I didn't want to make it seem like I was going overboard with praise, but the fact is that there are many masterful writers who are totally *unlike* Shakespeare and I'd never compare them, but I think your way of storytelling is actually similar. It has that theatrical sweep of inevitable tragedy and classically-inspired build and flow of energy -- cathexis/catharsis.

Thank you again.

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