InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "...but you drink like a prince"

ellnyx (ellnyx) wrote in het_challenge,
@ 2008-09-05 12:57:00

Entry tags:

f: final fantasy 12, r: promptbuilding

how to go on not looking [ffxii, balthier/ashe]
~I don’t know whether to be proud or horrified.
~I apologise for Basch, but, er......
~Apologies also for the ff.net link. Apparently 17100 words is not a happy size for LJ.

Fandom: FFXII
Author: logistika_nyx
Title: How To Go On Not Looking
Pairing: Balthier/Ashe
Characters: minor Basch daydreaming over Balthier, assorted Dalmascans
Ratings/Warnings: R, post-game, non-linear timeline (dated), sex, life
Prompt: “…they buried her alive in 1945.”

.

Not to look back, Ffamran wrote, I’ve learned that lesson well.

.

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myeerah
2008-09-18 10:14 am UTC (link)

If it helps, I actually dug on the things left unspoken. The implication that Balthier was punishing himself for leaving Fran to die by stubbornly sticking to his decision to stay with Ashe. The resentment that started with the first, failed pregnancy—a sort of, "You did this to me!" compounded by the later, "And you didn't even do it right!" Basch feeling slighted that he was never told Balthier survived in the form of Ffamran, but still longing for him nonetheless. Those may have lost some poignancy if you spell them out too hard.

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ellnyx
2008-09-21 12:20 am UTC (link)

That's very true and I did want everything to be vague and achy and unspoken. Those issues you mention were the major ones that I wanted to write into this, so they got dealt with better than the others. The bits that probably need the clarification are more centred around Basch and his involvement, with a few more sentences neatened to clear up Ashe's motivation. The scene where Basch lets Ffamran go, either back to Rabanastre or 'away' (which is what Basch hopes, so he can keep dreaming about Balthier) is especially ambiguous.

I have trouble writing Basch and Ashe POV at the best of times, though. As well as technical issues. This whole text definitely needed more transitions for legibility, gah, way too long to be written as a one-shot.

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