Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I like slugs and snails."

Username: 
Password:    
Remember Me
  • Create Account
  • IJ Login
  • OpenID Login
Search by : 
  • View
    • Create Account
    • IJ Login
    • OpenID Login
  • Journal
    • Post
    • Edit Entries
    • Customize Journal
    • Comment Settings
    • Recent Comments
    • Manage Tags
  • Account
    • Manage Account
    • Viewing Options
    • Manage Profile
    • Manage Notifications
    • Manage Pictures
    • Manage Schools
    • Account Status
  • Friends
    • Edit Friends
    • Edit Custom Groups
    • Friends Filter
    • Nudge Friends
    • Invite
    • Create RSS Feed
  • Asylums
    • Post
    • Asylum Invitations
    • Manage Asylums
    • Create Asylum
  • Site
    • Support
    • Upgrade Account
    • FAQs
    • Search By Location
    • Search By Interest
    • Search Randomly

roxie barringer doesn't turn on the red light ([info]tightwire) wrote in [info]gooseberry,
@ 2017-03-15 20:00:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:! journal, reece downing, roxanne barringer

Very important inquiry from home: "Charming and silver-tongued" (his words, not mine) spider would like to diversify his repitoire - currently predominantly featuring Shakespeare, with occasional forays into Shelley and Keats. Seeks advice on how to appeal to a younger and "less classically-minded" clientelle. Does not appreciate being told to "perhaps watch Arachnophobia, Roxanne."

Though I think that last part may have been aimed at me.

Better monologue/poetry suggestions would be much appreciated.


[Chris]

Hey there, bossman.

Quick question. Beater practice tomorrow - want to try something a little bit different?

(Post a new comment)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 08:29 pm UTC (link)
Maybe some Shel Silverstein.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 08:36 pm UTC (link)
huh. He might actually be able to steal all the little ones from the Mermaid Tank with that.

Which would definitely appeal to him.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 08:45 pm UTC (link)
Everyone loves a whimsical poetry reading spider! Although famous movie quotes might be a good bet too.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 08:54 pm UTC (link)
I think so!

Though, normally, the whole "gigantic spider" thing outweighs his natural whimsy. Which really is unfair. Claudius is an excellent babysitter.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 09:08 pm UTC (link)
That'd probably be a hard sell on nomajs, yeah.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:11 pm UTC (link)
Weirdly enough, they tend to do better with him. Probably because they think he's fake. Most wizards tend to think he's planning on eating them.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 09:13 pm UTC (link)
What does he actually eat?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:14 pm UTC (link)
Steak, mostly.

Very expensive, very rare steak.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 09:15 pm UTC (link)
I'd way rather eat expensive steak than stringy wizard but maybe that's just me.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:18 pm UTC (link)
He enjoys making the occasional threat, but assures me that we taste terrible to anyone with a reasonably refined palate.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:04 pm UTC (link)
Wait is this just Charlotte's Web? Am I gonna cry at the end of this?

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:09 pm UTC (link)
I certainly hope not.

It's been a while, but I don't remember there being a lot of poetry-reading in that book?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:09 pm UTC (link)
No, but there was a highly literate spider!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:13 pm UTC (link)
True!

Claudius is older than my father, though. So I don't think he's planning on going anywhere anytime soon.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:43 pm UTC (link)
That's good! CHARLOTTE'S WEB MADE ME SO SAD!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:45 pm UTC (link)
So I won't suggest any readings from that book.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:46 pm UTC (link)
I mean, it's about a lovable spider, but it's also sad? So I dunno.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:49 pm UTC (link)
I don't think crying is the vibe we're shooting for.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:50 pm UTC (link)
But the metaphors!!! Thematic appropriateness!!!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:52 pm UTC (link)
Maybe I'll just make him read it to me and we'll see how he feels about it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:53 pm UTC (link)
Good call.

OKAY OKAY BUT what is Claudius like I need to get a feel for his personality before I can discuss PERFORMANCES.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:55 pm UTC (link)
He's an acromantula.

And quite a gentleman, I think.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:57 pm UTC (link)
Okay, but what sort of gentleman? Like, a dapper British fellow?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:59 pm UTC (link)
I'd like to think that he'd enjoy wearing a monocle if he could decide which eye to put it on.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-16 12:24 pm UTC (link)
Okay so I have two thoughts. But it depends on Claudius.

One, he could read Bond villain monologues. Or just any really great villain monologues. Lot of audience recognition.

OR or, if he doesn't want to play into bad spiders stereotypes, he could totally just read chart topping song lyrics. I am picturing him with a really dignified voice, and he could totally read Beyonce with a straight voice and all that gravitas and it would be great.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 09:13 pm UTC (link)
I think Shakespeare is a little more advanced than "some pig".

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:21 pm UTC (link)
Are you defending my spider's honor?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 09:22 pm UTC (link)
Just an observation!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 09:34 pm UTC (link)
It wasn't an accusation! I appreciate it. And I think it's very attractive sweet dashing.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:41 pm UTC (link)
"Some pig" is pretty advanced for a non magical spider!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]thingamabobbs
2017-03-15 09:42 pm UTC (link)
How do we know she wasn't magic, though?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]gonnabefamous
2017-03-15 09:42 pm UTC (link)
I mean, do we ever really know who is and isn't magic in literature?

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]doyouevenlift
2017-03-15 10:29 pm UTC (link)
Dante's Inferno. But the divine comedy kind, not the video game kind.

[Roxie]

Sure, since I'm already fucking dead. What you got in mind?

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 10:35 pm UTC (link)
There's a video game kind?

[Chris]

I wouldn't have asked if I thought you had very important murder business to attend to.

Want to learn how to not fall off things?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]doyouevenlift
2017-03-15 10:37 pm UTC (link)
There's always a video game kind, Roxanne.

[Roxie]

In my defense, the last two times is because I got hit with a really hard metal ball.

[...]

Wait. Am I about to learn how to walk on a tight rope?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 10:40 pm UTC (link)
I'm sorry. My video game knowledge is very lacking.

[Chris]

Excuses, excuses.

We'll start a little bit closer to the ground. But - same skill, yes.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]doyouevenlift
2017-03-15 10:42 pm UTC (link)
One of these days you're gonna have to come over and we're gonna have to play video games, dude

[Roxie]

I'm about to fucking learn how to walk on a tight rope, that's all you had to say

hell yeah I'm down.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-15 10:45 pm UTC (link)
Really?

I'm going to be terrible, but I'm still excited about it.

[Chris]

Excellent.

You'll be my first student, but I'm confident in our abilities.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]doyouevenlift
2017-03-16 12:00 am UTC (link)
We might have to start you out small and do supermario bros

[Roxie]</b>

Hey you were my first student and you turned out pretty badass

I have faith in you

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-16 12:03 am UTC (link)
I actually know what that is!

[Chris]

Maybe you're just super competent.

But I'm sure you're going to be great. We'll have you up in the air in no time.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]sibyls
2017-03-16 02:39 pm UTC (link)
But Shakespeare and Shelley and Keats are so lovely.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]tightwire
2017-03-16 03:12 pm UTC (link)
Oh, I don't think he has any intention of removing them. Just adding a few things. For special occasions.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]unregrettable
2017-03-16 03:43 pm UTC (link)
Maybe Ty could teach him something new.

(Reply to this)

Home | Site Map | Manage Account | TOS | Privacy | Support | FAQs