She shook her head. It still must have somehow been her fault; she hadn't been good enough for him to wait for her. She had disappeared. She hadn't been there when he'd needed her. All of those things and more were why this had happened, and she hated herself for it.
"I just wish - I wish Kitty and I could disappear," she whispered. "Dad left, and I just want to go with him. And before, after I first got here, there - there were so many people who changed ages. And maybe if I had, too, maybe if I could be younger again, before we were together..." But all of that was out of her hands, and she had Kitty to think of, too.
"I don't know how to start over. I don't know how to make this easier, and sometimes - sometimes I can't breathe, it hurts so much. And every time I talk to Teddy and try to tell him how much it hurts--" She shook her head again. "That's my mistake, isn't it? Expecting him to understand how much this hurts me when it's human nature for him to defend himself and his actions. He was my best friend, and he knew me better than anyone, but we're all heroes of our own lives, aren't we? Of course he doesn't think he did anything wrong. He sees it from his perspective, where he didn't have to be alone during a difficult time, and I see it from mine, where all I have is hurt and loss."
She wiped her eyes before a fresh wave of tears hit her. "I don't know how to make this okay. I don't want him back. I don't want to abandon Kitty. I just don't want to feel like the whole world's crumbling in around me all the time."