Dr. Caitlin Snow (doctorsnow) wrote in fortitudeic, @ 2016-03-09 21:00:00 |
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Entry tags: | caitlin snow, derek hale |
WHO: Caitlin Snow and Derek Hale
WHERE: Caitlin’s townhouse
WHEN: Backdated to Monday 3/7, evening
WHAT: Dinner/first date
RATING: Mentions of loss and terrible music preferences, but otherwise low
STATUS: Complete
The last thing Caitlin had ever expected was for Derek to agree to dinner. He was kind to her. He seemed like a good person on top of being unfairly attractive. The problem was that Caitlin held a secret of his, and she could not tell if he was nice because he actually liked her (as a friend, or otherwise), or if he was just trying to stay on her good side so she didn’t change her mind. Practice had gone as well as it could. He kept saying she was better than she thought she was. Caitlin still thought she was just lucky to having an opportunity to learn at her own pace. Athletics was still not her strong point. After class she’d suggested giving a little bit of time to get cleaned up before dinner. Between training, and spending all day in the lab preparing to finally get her hands on Steve’s blood, Caitlin wanted a shower. She went as quickly as she was capable of going. It wasn’t like she had access to her wardrobe or makeup supply in this place, so her regular ‘get ready’ routine had really been cut in half. By the time there was a knock on her and Rogue’s door, she was put together and in the kitchen trying to make the most out of their supplies. God bless Rogue for thinking along the same lines that Caitlin had been. Caitlin was a bit of an organizational freak. So when she opened the door to let Derek in, the house was basically pristine. However had lived here before didn’t exactly have the same tastes that Caitlin did, but she had made the best of it. “Hey.” Caitlin closed the door behind them, her nerves instantly jumping, though she was doing a decent job of not showing it. “I’m glad you came. It’s a nice change of pace from dinner in the lab.” Derek was glad when Caitlin suggested a break between their private lesson and dinner, because he felt filthy between patrol and the workout that came with giving a session. She was a hard worker and she liked to challenge herself; Derek’s sessions with Caitlin, whether in the setting of the class or, apparently, privately were always a full exertion -- for him, to hold himself back from showing too much strength accidentally and for her to keep up. It had been such a long time since Derek had been with a woman and, quite honestly, he couldn’t remember ever being invited for dinner as opposed to sex, and he wanted to make a good impression. The reason was two-fold: Caitlin knew what he was and was willing to keep it a secret, but staying on her good side would ensure that. But also, Caitlin was a beautiful woman and he enjoyed spending time around her and talking to her. She seemed all right and Derek wasn’t the only one who appeared to trust her, so maybe...it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if he let himself get to know someone new; if he let the walls down a little bit for her. While his wardrobe left a lot to be desired, he at least looked presentable, he thought, when he made his way to the townhouse number Caitlin had given him and knocked on the door. When she opened it and greeted him, immediately he could sense that she was tense and he could smell the anxiousness on her. Well then, he thought, maybe he wasn’t the only one with any skin in this game. Maybe she was interested in tiptoeing into that territory as well. “Hey,” he greeted back, stepping inside and he smiled at her when he did. “No, thanks for inviting me,” he countered. “I’m glad.” He tried to keep from giving off too strong a signal in one direction or the other because he thought maybe she could use a little neutrality for the first few moments so that she could center herself and stop feeling so nervous. “I, uh...can’t honestly say I’ve ever been out to dinner and I think this is about as close to the camp’s equivalent of that as we’re going to get, so...bear with me… Do you need any help or anything? What can I do?” he asked, looking a little bit sheepish because if they’d had a restaurant to go to, then obviously they would just be there and the staff would do the work, but Derek wasn’t sure if this was a date or not and if it was, what the hell actually he was supposed to be doing on it. Derek seldom ended up dating so much as he ended up in bed with the wrong women too often for his taste. Being a doctor meant she was all too aware of negative impacts of poor diets. Which meant Caitlin knew her way around a kitchen. The oven was on, there was a variety of vegetables on the counter in various states of being diced. “You’ve never been to dinner before?” that was probably more surprising to her than anything she’d heard at this camp yet. “How is that possible?” Never with his family, or on a date? She knew very little about him, but going to dinner was so common it was one of those things she assumed everyone did. Caitlin shook her head, picking up her knife. “You don’t have to. It’s not exactly a complicated recipe.” Nothing she could make here really was. It wasn’t a bad thing, in the end, a back to basics diet wasn’t the worst thing that could happen to them, as long as they were able to keep it balanced. “It’s Mediterranean Quinoa. If you really want to to stir the quinoa, you can, but pretty much everything is just about ready to go.” she said with a smile. She picked up a knife from the cutting board and resumed slicing the tomatoes she had been working on before he had come to the door. “I never really realized how much I took grocery stores and freezers for granted until here. It’s been in an interesting shock to the system.” Derek shook his head, giving another sheepish look as he shrugged. “We were kind of a cook at home sort of family when I was growing up and then after that I just...I don’t know, I feel like it’s different ordering takeout or cooking dinner by yourself than it is having dinner with someone,” he pointed out. He held up both hands in a white-flag waving sort of gesture. “I don’t want to mess up what you’ve already got going,” he said. “You don’t need anything else, though, right? Table set, drinks?” he prompted helpfully. The laugh that escaped him was one that conveyed understanding. It’s funny because it’s true. “Yeah, tell me about it, it’s a lot more obnoxious having to live on non-perishables almost exclusively than I would’ve thought, because I’d never had to try.” “Didn’t go out on a lot of dates or to dinner parties, hm?” Which she actually found hard to believe. But maybe he just wasn’t the dating type. Before Ronnie had convinced her to actually live a little, she hadn’t been either. Caitlin looked around her kitchen, momentarily blanking on where she and Rogue kept everything. It was still a new setting to her as well. “Plates are there, cups are there.” she motioned to the shelves as she spoked. “Cutlery is in the drawer by the fridge. And for drinks….well, I can’t say we have a lot. Thank you Apocalypse. There’s water, tea, coffee, and if you want something stronger, wine on the fridge door and whiskey hidden behind the dish towels in the bottom cupboard there.” It was half empty, because this place often called for alcohol. “I’ll actually go for tea, if you wouldn’t mind filling the kettle to boil?” she asked, gesturing to the kettle on the counter. Tomatoes done, she checked on the quinoa, lifting the pot. A few more minutes and it would be ready for the rest of the ingredients to be tossed in as well. She went back to the tomatoes and started cutting the last one. “How is your sister doing? Is she settling in okay?” She seemed like an extremely stubborn woman, she appeared to be strong, but for all Caitlin knew that was just a front. This place wasn’t exactly easy to get use to. Caitlin still woke up some mornings wondering if she’d just had a nightmare, only to find out that it was actually reality. A soft huff of amusement came in response. “No,” he said, shaking his head. “I don’t think I’ve been on a date since high school and I’m not even sure sneaking off with my girlfriend in the middle of the night really counts as a date,” he replied, “and dinner parties...are not really my thing…” Derek couldn’t actually imagine a reality wherein he’d even be invited to a dinner party, much less attend one. That was so weird to think about. As Caitlin gestured, Derek started moving, pulling down plates and glasses; taking out silverware. Neither caffeine nor alcohol was going to have any effect on him personally, but most of the time, as far as he knew, caffeine didn’t really have any outward effect on regular humans anyway. She knew he was a werewolf, but she didn’t necessarily need to know the ins and outs of being one. “Tea it is,” he agreed, setting the table before moving on to fill the kettle as instructed. He looked over at Caitlin and gave her a small sort of smile that didn’t really reach his eyes. “She’s okay,” he replied. “I think it would be a stretch to say that anybody’s really happy here, but...she adjusting. She misses São Paulo. ...I do, too, honestly,” he added. It was nice of Caitlin to ask and Derek wished that he didn’t find himself wondering whether she actually cared or whether it was a gentle segway into asking again whether Cora was like him. He pushed the thought away. Not everyone had to be out to get them. “I talked to Barry earlier...he said we should all hang out,” he said suddenly, grinning a little. “I told him maybe once things kind of calmed down and I didn’t have all this stupid drama to try to iron out behind the scenes.” It was a subtle way to let Caitlin in the loop; her friend had been checking up on Derek already. “I think once Cora kind of settles in more, then she’ll be able to lend more of a hand and it won’t be...so much,” he finished with a sigh. Here Caitlin thought she was way behind on the dating game. She had not missed his use of the word ‘date’ in reference to going to dinner, so she was choosing to interpret that as a good sign. “Some girls might count that as a date?” she suggested, though that was just a guess. “Anyway, dinner is usually a safe bet. Everyone has to eat.” Caitlin looked up at him as he spoke about Cora, trying to guess what he might be thinking based off his facial reactions. She wasn’t the best at that. “You mean you both don’t prefer the end of the world over São Paulo?” she asked in fake shock. “I can’t believe it. This place just has so much going for it.” Only not at all. “São Paulo must be gorgeous.” She’d spent pretty much all of her life working or in school. Travelling was not something Caitlin had really had the opportunity to do a lot of. It was hard not to be a little envious. “It sucks. But as long as she’s managing. I’m still waiting for someone to arrive and not be able to manage it.” It was kind of amazing she hadn’t heard of anyone having a really bad reaction. Apart from Stiles, who seemed to be doing better with Joey’s help. Caitlin was adding the chili peppers and herbs when she paused just for a second when he mentioned Barry. “Were you?” she said slowly, trying really hard not to roll her eyes. Message received, Barry was checking up on her. “Funny, he hadn’t mentioned the idea to me at all.” She wasn’t exactly use to anyone checking up on men she had an interest in. But in this situation she wasn’t totally surprised it was happening either. “I’m sorry, I hope he at least tried to be subtle. “Don’t feel obligated if you don’t want to. You’ve got your sister to worry about, and most of the teenagers here seem to be from your world. That would stress me out. You’ve got more than enough to deal with besides my friends.” "Yeah, I suspect in high school, that's about as close as it gets, huh?" he asked with a soft chuckle. "This is better," he agreed. "...not that...I mean, I don't know if 'date' was what you were going for, so..." he backpedalled quickly. "I didn't mean, you know, to assume or anything." Derek laughed again and cocked his eyebrows. "I mean, it's a really close call, but..." he joked, trailing off intentionally as he smiled back at her. The smile softened a little and he nodded. "It really is. I'm really glad I went down there, it's incredible. You'll have to look me up when we get out of here; come down and visit me. I'll show you around," he offered, keeping his wording on the optimistic side and replacing the if he felt with the when he thought would sound less self-defeating. His eyebrows raised slightly at that. "Yeah, eventually, that's bound to happen. I have faith in you, though, Caitlin," he said, reiterating what seemed to be an on-going joke now between them, one he'd started when he'd tried to talk her into coming to his class back when he'd first started it. "Yeah, that happened," Derek replied. "It's cool, he was the opposite of subtle, but I know why he was doing it, so it's fine," he laughed, shaking his head. "It's nice that you've got someone who cares about you that much. Not everybody could probably say the same. I don't know that the invitation was a genuine one or just a way to meet me in person, since he and I have only ever talked over the comms, but...yeah, I really need to kind of focus on the stuff I already have on my plate." Derek paused then. "...which is not to say I'm unwilling to carve out some extra time for you," he said, a hopeful lilt creeping into his voice unexpectedly. “I wouldn’t know, honestly. I graduated high school at fourteen. So. Not a lot of sneaking around with boys happening then.” She shrugged, indifferent to it all. Caitlin didn’t think she had really missed much. “Oh. Uh.” Caitlin visibly flushed and looked down, despite the small smile on her face. “Yeah, kind of. Not that it has to be. I mean, we can just call it dinner and take it from there.” Oh god. She had a Ph.D. and she was still awkward as hell. She could practically hear some sort of joke from Cisco already. Caitlin wasn’t convinced that everyone from this camp was even from the same world. She knew other realities were more than possible, and the idea that they had somehow not managed to close all the portals to Earth 2 properly had crossed her mind. Or that a portal somewhere else had been missed. She wasn’t even sure she was from the same reality as Derek. “I’m not even sure we’re from the same reality.” she admitted, putting her thoughts into words. She didn’t comment on the ‘when’ wording as opposed to using ‘if.’ She hoped it was a ‘when’ as well. “But if it turns out we are. Then yeah, I’d absolutely take vacation days to see you, and Brazil.” “It’s likely genuine. But he’s like my family, and slightly protective. It’s not easy meeting new people back home, because of the whole keeping Barry’s identity as a masked super-hero a secret. But he’s a really nice guy. Just keep in mind that all three of us are uber-nerds. Our conversations can get ridiculous.” If he would actually join them one night, she wasn’t sure. But he was more than welcome, if he could put up with Cisco’s never ending movie quotes and sometimes bad jokes. She added the last of the ingredients into the pot to let it heat up just a little, then leaned against the counter. The smile on her face had not left. “I think you’ve already made it clear you’ll carve out some extra time for me. I mean, you’re here. And you don’t have to help me out with extra private lessons. Which I am a fan of, by the way.” Giving Caitlin a facial shrug and lifting his eyebrows, impressed, Derek nodded. “Wow, I was still struggling with freshman algebra when I was fourteen,” he said and tried not to feel mildly intimidated by that level of intelligence. The worry came more with the fact the someone significantly smarter than him held a sort of power he would never be able to grasp and that was probably unfair to Caitlin, since it wasn't anything personal. Her response to his uncertainty regarding the actual status of the dinner made Derek smile a little. “No, no, I was kind of hoping it was,” he countered her attempt to backpedal. Truthfully, Derek didn't really understand the whole different universes concept — that flavor of crazy completely eluded him — but he at least understood that it was a possibility if only because he was vaguely familiar with the Avengers before meeting any of them. “Well, fingers crossed then,” he replied. Derek really doubted he would take Barry up on the offer, mostly because he wasn't a terribly sociable guy. “Hanging out" wasn't really a thing Derek did all that often, if at all, by choice. He preferred peace and quiet and those things came naturally with solitude. “I'm a fan of those, too, actually,” he replied, grinning. “I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the legitimate and productive excuse to spend more time with you,” he added just as the kettle started to scream for attention. At that, Derek moved to take it off the burner, causally and intentionally letting himself invade Caitlin’s personal space a little before stepping back. “What kind of tea do you have?” he asked. Derek wasn't a huge fan of tea, preferring the more bitter bite of coffee to the more watery “taste" that he never seemed to be able to find in tea, but he was willing to give it another shot if Caitlin wanted to make his. Maybe he'd just been making it wrong. “Well, I was struggling with freshman bullies when I was fourteen. There’s ups and downs to everything.” She knew her level of intelligence was often intimidating, and could cause negative backlash toward her. Especially from men. So anyone who respected her for her intelligence earned just a few extra points. Her intelligence was her only real form of defense. Unless Derek’s class really worked well. His confirmation of the status of their dinner made her relax a little. At least they were both on the same page, assuming he was telling the truth. “Then yes. A date. First date. Casual. No pressure.” If he didn’t date often, she didn’t want him to feel any pressure. It was dinner, they were seeing how this went. She felt rather pleased with herself when he confirmed he liked spending time with her, even if for productive reasons. Actually, productive reasons was almost better in some way. Getting to know someone and working toward another goal was a good way to go about things at the end of the world. Her heart rate sped up just a little when he stepped forward, but she didn’t move. Instead she found herself once again eying just how big he was. The good kind. His height, his build, it was really hard to not notice these things. For all of her abilities to handle herself in crisis situations, somehow her brain still managed to cloud over in the presence of men she found herself attracted to. “What?” She’d want to kick herself in a minute for sounding clueless. It took a minute for her brain to process his question, her focus having to move away from Oh my god, those arms, to tea brands. She shook her head, as if trying to shake her brain back into focus. “Um. Early gray, orange pekoe, chai and mint.” she managed to rattle off after a moment. Caitlin turned around, reaching up to the cupboard behind her to reveal the flavors. She reached for the box of Chai, and looked over her shoulder. “Do you want tea as well, or would you prefer something else?” Derek smiled, nodding. “No pressure is good,” he agreed. Especially since he was realizing way belatedly that he was nearly thirty and this was his first actual date. Running off to abandoned buildings to make out with Paige probably didn't count, sneaking around to have sex with Kate Argent before he realized what a terrible idea that was almost certainly didn't count. He'd slept with Jennifer and Braeden, but they'd never gone out, really. Derek suddenly felt kind of pathetic when he thought about it. He noticed less her verbal stumble and more the slight increase in her heartbeat that seemed to be in time with his own. Caitlin was different. She actually embodied the things that had attracted him to Jennifer. She wasn't a wilting flower, but she also wasn't a mercenary. She was smart, but she wasn't nefarious in her cleverness, as far as he could tell. And he would have to have been blind to fail to note that she was beautiful. Back at their own house, Cora was probably crawling out of her skin worrying that her idiot older brother was making yet another terrible judgement call over a pretty face, but Derek got the impression that he had maybe finally gotten it right this time. “Yeah, I mean, if you'll make it for me? Honestly, every time I've ever tried, it just tastes like hot water,” he admitted with a laugh. “I'm willing to give tea another chance with a little help from someone who actually knows how to make it.” “I don’t know if it would pass a taste test in the UK, but I typically know my way around tea. Or anything caffeinated.” At this point it was a wonder that coffee and tea still managed to have any impact on her, with the amount she drank. Caitlin was fairly convinced that Jitters got half their business from STAR Labs. “But of course I can make it. Does Chai work for you as well?” Once she had his flavor choice, she pulled down the boxes of tea to set them on the counter. Then she turned off the stove, the food was probably good to go at this point. Tea, mugs and hot water, she made the tea and set the mugs aside to steep, before grabbing two bowls and a serving spoon to serve up their dinner. She placed the bowls, with cutlery on the kitchen table, and then carried over the mugs. “Normally I’d add milk and honey. But again, yay Apocalypse. It just needs a few more minutes to steep.” Caitlin motioned for him to take a seat while sitting down herself. “Hopefully it’s good. I usually go for this when I’m short on time at home. It works for being short of supplies as well.” With a shrug, Derek smiled. “I don't know the difference between any of those, except mint doesn't sound like a thing I'd want with dinner, so I'll just take whatever you're having,” he said. As Derek watched her start to serve them both, he bit back the reflex to ask how he could help again, figuring that he'd said it once and she'd ask if she wanted it. Instead, he sat down when Caitlin invited him to and he smiled again. “I can almost guarantee you it'll be better than anything me or my sister could've come up with,” he replied, only half-joking. He waited until Caitlin started before he started, too, complimenting the flavor genuinely, without the caveat of “for an apocalypse.” “So what exactly do you do back home? I get the feeling you aren't a general practitioner or anything…” Small talk was obnoxious, but it was somewhere to start, he supposed, right? Cait tasted her own creation slowly, she felt more cautious about it when someone else besides her actually had to eat it. But it tasted pretty good, so at least that was a win. She wait until she swallowed her first bite before she got into her career path. As she spoke, she removed the tea bags from their bups, setting them aside on a napkin. “I’m a biomedical engineer, technically, by trade. The short version of that being I take the engineering principles and apply them to medicine and biology to try and further health care. I worked for a company called STAR Labs, which about two years ago became the home base for The Flash. I apply my knowledge to help deal with rogue metahumans- people with superpowers- who use their abilities to attack and harm others. Which actually happens a lot. I can usually help to figure out a weakness or a way to combat specific powers to help take them down. I’m also the team's resident doctor, because I also have training in other fields. Neurosurgery, chemistry, and so on. Taking on metahumans tends to lead to quite a few injuries. Don’t ask me how I managed to build a career as support for a guy with superpowers in a costume. It all just kind of happened.” she smiled, but it was a weak one. The past two years would almost be unbelievable to her if she hadn’t lived them. Her career wasn’t where she thought it was going to be, but she was happy with it. She had chose it, even if it initially had started by accident. “And you? What did you do in São Paulo?” Talking about what they did at home almost seemed strange. It was their lives, but it almost seemed like forever ago, even if she really had not been here all that long. Nodding, Derek was quiet as he listened. It always sort of interested him to hear what people did for a living because he'd never had a job. He'd never needed one. And Caitlin certainly had an interesting career, to say the least. His eyebrows were lifted with interest as she went on. “Sounds exciting,” he said sincerely. Then she asked what he did and Derek huffed a sort of laugh, looking down and filling his fork again. “Nothing,” he said honestly, looking back up. “Absolutely nothing. Just...reconnecting with my sister. ...when we were kids, there was a fire. Most of the family died in it and my older sister and I thought Cora had, too, so...we left town to start over. ...I found out seven years later, give or take, that she'd made it out alive. So I was down there because she lives down there and we're kind of...trying to get to know each other all over again. I inherited a lot of money when my older sister died, so I don't work or anything, I just...spend time with Cora. We have a lot of time to make up for, you know?” Caitlin nearly dropped her fork when he spoke about his family. The shock on her face was clear, sympathy completely genuine. She couldn’t even imagine something like that happening. Having lost her father and her husband was horrible enough, trying to even comprehend what a fire that killed almost a whole family was something she couldn’t even begin to wrap her head around. “Oh my god, Derek. I’m so sorry.” That probably didn’t mean a damn thing, it wasn’t like being sorry changed anything. But it was one of those things that was so awful you couldn’t help but be sorry just hearing about it. Caitlin might have been career driven, but she could see why he chose reconnecting with his sister instead. “Yeah, absolutely. If you have the ability to do that, I can see why you would.” She tried doing the math in her head, based off of hold old Cora looked now. “...she must have been so young. Cora, I mean. She must be incredibly strong, surviving on her own after all of that. Both of you.” Derek gave her a small smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. It was a rare occasion that he mentioned the fire to someone that didn't already have some knowledge about it. The fire was bad enough; he didn't mention that it was arson. His sister dying was enough; he didn't mention that she was murdered. Instead, he just cleared his throat again and nodded solemnly. “Thanks. Yeah, she was pretty young. But yeah, she's a tough cookie, my sister. But like I said,” he replied, a slightly more genuine smile on his face, “I kind of only know impressive women. My sisters weren’t and aren't exceptions.” “You weren’t exaggerating.” she said, nodding her head. She could see where some of that admiration for women came from, given just a small look into his history. “I lost my dad, when I was young. He’s a huge reason why I became a doctor in the first place, and probably why I take my job a little too seriously sometimes.” She could easily let it consume her, especially when faced with loss again. “As much as it sucks that you’re both dragged into this mess, at least you have each other here, then. You know where the other is. That has to be somewhat of a relief. It’s a relief for me to know that if Cisco and Barry are stuck here, at least they’re here in camp.” Caitlin picked up her mug with both hands, enjoying the warmth against her palms. This had become depressing really fast. It was a part of life, but it still sucked. “How’s working with defense?” she asked, honestly interested. “It seems weird, from what I can tell. Is it me, or is it really only a small number of people on defense who actually leave camp?” Derek’s smile faded a little into something more empathetic. Losing a parent — in his case, also his Alpha — was one of the most painful things he could imagine experiencing. “I’m sorry,” he offered. “At least, I’m sure, you make him proud.” Derek didn’t think he could say the same. He’d had the spark and he’d fucked everything up. His mother wouldn’t be proud of him; she would’ve been appalled. Nodding, Derek took another bite of his dinner and once he’d swallowed, he opened his mouth to respond to her first point when the second one amidst a question kind of punched him in the gut. Caitlin probably didn’t realize it, but she’d hit a nerve with that. He took a deep breath and cocked his eyebrows once. “Yeah...weird is one way to put it. Disorganized and reckless is another,” he said with a frown. “It’s not just you. A handful of people are allowed to leave and the rest of us just patrol the fences and have little to no actual training on what to expect out there. Hearing Steve talk about it can only prepare a person so much, so basically if anything happens to the Alpha and Bravo groups on one of those outings and they don’t come back, that leaves Charlie and Delta to choose to go in completely blind and unprepared or the whole camp is screwed. It’s a shitty system, in my opinion, but what do I know? I’m just some guy. I’m sure as shit not Captain America,” he said. Or the Flash, he almost added before biting it back because Barry, at least, agreed with him that the way the Defense teams were going about things was unwise. “So, in short, it’s stupid,” Derek said bluntly and honestly, shrugging a little. “And it’s a good way to make a guy feel like a useless lump. Hence, the self-defense classes. Those are the only reason I feel like I’m making any contribution at all to this place. It’s kind of hard to feel like a deserving member of a community when you’re not allowed to actually contribute at all to it. If not for those classes I give, I’d feel like the biggest freeloader.” More than anything she hoped she was making her dad proud. Ronnie as well, but he was a story for another day. Not really something you bring up on what was essentially a first date. “I know exactly nothing about surviving in a place like this. But you kind of does make sense to be sending out more than just Alpha and Bravo. With all these new people showing up, we’re going to be going through supplies so much faster. Every kind of supplies. I feel like I take stock of medical twice a day just to be sure we’re fine. Do you think maybe he’s still stuck in the mindframe of only having a few people to work with?” She had heard that before very recently, the number of people in the camp was less than ten. Maybe he hadn’t adjusted his thinking. Something really needed to be done about it. “The only reason Captain America is in charge is because he got here first. I haven’t asked Barry what he thinks. But something’s going to have to change. Or adjust. One of the members of Alpha team is from my home, she might have a different opinion as well.” Caitlin had no idea, really, but it didn’t really seem like they were using their resources to the best of their abilities. “You’re not a freeloader. I heard you guys saved everyone just before I showed up here, when Alpha was out of camp. That should at least prove you’re more than capable of doing your job.” Derek shook his head. "I don't know, but Barry and I talked about that, too. That there's so many more people coming in all the time and we'll need to make runs more often. There's four squads, so there's no reason why we shouldn't be going out once a week, one team each week. ...but because only Bravo and Alpha are trained, it'd be a suicide mission for my team or Chris's. It's just really poorly handled, in my opinion, but again, what do I know? I just hope I'm not proven right, I guess," he said, shrugging. Caitlin went on to say that she didn't know where Barry stood. Derek did. "He agrees with me. Barry, I mean. We discussed that, briefly, but he agrees that something needs to change. The way things are going are not effective with the change in the population, at all. It's setting the camp up for failure if something goes wrong." He took another deep breath and let it out slowly. Venting at Caitlin about the way things were going with Defense didn't really seem like good first date conversation material. A weak smile that didn't reach his eyes slid over Derek's lips and he shrugged again. "And yet, there's always an excuse for why only specific people can go out. Those of us that were still here were lucky we didn't get ourselves killed, because we had no clue what we were up against until it was on top of us. Back home, I proved myself a terrible leader, so I really don't have room to throw stones in that particular house of glass, but...it just seems reckless to keep doing things the way they're being done. God help us if anything bad ever happens to the people that do leave camp, because the rest of us will be completely clueless how to handle their missions on our own, as it stands right now." But Derek was not going to be the one to bring it up with the other two teams, that was for damned sure. Stepping on toes was not something that a person who wanted to fly under the radar would do, that was for sure. If Barry wanted to approach them, he'd let Barry do it. "Anyway..." he laughed, picking up his mug and taking a sip to shut himself back down from the tension that came with talking about the Defense teams. She had to wonder if she should just be minding her own business and focusing her concern on medical. She was so use to having her hands in almost everything back at home, it was weird to not be considering the safety of the people who were sent out to deal with issues. She only had to be involved if they came back hurt. She started to catch on that this was something Derek didn’t seem to thrilled to be talking about. Right . Not everyone liked bringing their work home with them and basically sleeping with files. It was probably just her who did that, really. Take a hint, Caitlin. “Alright, so. Clearly you can fight, so you must have had some sort of training there. You apparently like to travel, since you moved to Brazil. Or maybe that’s just the heat. You don’t really date much, and don’t drink a lot of tea. You were popular in high school and some sort of jock. Tell me something else. Have you traveled anywhere else? Or tell me something random. Like what’s the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you?” Caitlin asked with bit of a cheeky grin. She was attempting to lighten the mood again, between families and work, their topic had become depressing. As long as he was willing to along with it. Just a few years ago Caitlin herself would have stared blankly at someone had they asked her that. She was still trying to learn more about what kind of person Derek was outside of practicing. Laughing a little, Derek shook his head. There was a lot to choose from there, actually. The most embarrassing thing, for Derek, also happened to be one of the most depressing, so he decided to forgo that question. Instead, he latched onto something else. “I’ve been to Mexico,” he offered, “a couple of times.” Once, involuntarily, but that was another story for a day closer to never than today. “And actually, I’m not really sure why Cora chose Brazil, but I only went down there for her. ...it is gorgeous down there, though. Learning Portuguese was a bit of a challenge, but already knowing Spanish, it wasn’t too bad.” He tried to think of something random to share with her that wasn’t in some way linked to something awful that would bring him back down in a way that she might be able to read hiding behind his eyes and it took a minute. “...I really like Fall Out Boy,” he offered, killing potentially two birds with one stone. “Which is a random fact and also happens to be kind of embarrassing, so now you owe me one,” he laughed. Sighing, Cait leaned forward on her seat, trying to picture herself enjoying something other than tea in Mexico. “I’m so jealous. I really should have done more travelling by now.” She had planned to do travelling, but after the explosion everything had changed. “I was going to, I had all these plans. None of them worked out. When we get out of here I really need to fix that. Her mentioned Fall Out Boy at the same time she was taking a drink of tea, and she ended up half laughing, half coughing as she tried not to choke on tea. “You’re right, that’s kind of embarrassing. You probably shouldn’t let the spread around too much.” she agreed, clearing her throat. “Though probably not as embarrassing as inhaling Chai. I don’t suppose that counts, does it?” She knew it didn’t. Caitlin set down her mug, safely out of the way of being inhaled again, and tried to think of something relatively good. “Um. When I was sixteen I was working on a project with a partner at University. She was a few years older than me, and I don’t think she liked me much. Anyway, we were at her house, and she asked me to go up to her room and grab a textbook while she grabbed us snacks. She told me which room was hers, so I went. Turns out it wasn’t her room. It was her roommates. Who was a guy and he had his girlfriend over. I walked right in on them. The whole thing is hilarious now, but at 16 I had never been so mortified. I still don’t think I’ve ever felt my face turn as red as it did that day.” She shook her head, covering her face with her hand. It wasn’t really a big deal, apparently that kind of thing happened all the time at university. But at sixteen she did not know any better. “My partner laughed about it for days. I swear she was actually evil.” In spite of himself, Derek couldn’t help laughing when Caitlin choked on her tea. “I’m sorry,” he managed between chuckles. “Yeah I don’t really share that a whole lot. What can I say? They were the cool thing when I was in high school and it just kind of stuck. I can’t help it that they’re so awesome they ‘saved rock and roll’ when they came back,” he joked. He grinned a little at her story. “Yikes,” he replied. “I feel like that’s entirely fair to be embarrassed about in the moment. I never went to college,” he added. Beyond the fact that nothing really had ever grabbed him enough to want to study, when he was that age, he and Laura were still fighting to get the inheritance and they couldn’t really afford for him to go. Part of him felt like he’d missed out on some rite of passage, but the rest of him didn’t figure he would’ve fit in very well, anyway. Things changed after the fire; he wasn’t the same, outgoing person he’d been before it. After finishing his meal, he took up the mug for another drink. “I’ll tell you something I know about you that you don’t,” he suggested, “and then you can try the same.” He leaned back in his chair a little. It seemed like a different way to break the ice than they’d already been doing without making them talk about themselves, something with which Derek had never really been good at doing without sounding arrogant or feeling uncomfortable. “You,” he started and then grinned. “Don’t know that you’re beautiful. Do you?” he challenged. “You don’t carry yourself like you know it, anyway.” Shaking her head, she waved off his apology. It wasn’t necessary, she would have laughed at herself too had she been able to breath properly. “I didn’t realize they were ever a thing. I guess that shows how much I knew. I can’t name a single one of their songs.” She couldn’t even remember a tune to any of their songs. It was just a giant blank, and called to mind guys wearing too much eyeliner. Caitlin shrugged, “It’s not for everyone. It just happens to be what I’m good at.” She was fairly sure she’d never dated anyone who had anything less than a Masters. But it seemed like his skill set wasn’t something you learned in a classroom or lab. That wasn’t a bad thing. “But yeah, needless to say, after that assignment was over I never spoke to her again.” Arching an eyebrow, she regarded him with curiosity. “Okay. Shoot.” It came out more like a question, as she was both curious and skeptical about this. How could he possibly know something about her that she didn’t? Whatever she had been expecting, it wasn’t that. She had no idea what to say to that. “Well. I don’t think I’m the ugly stepsister or anything?” She had confidence in her capabilities and skills as a doctor. She thought she passed the pretty test and felt she did a pretty good job maintaining her appearance. “I won’t be walking a Victoria’s Secret catwalk ever, but....I think I’m fairly attractive?” “You probably could if you heard it,” he replied. “Admittedly, the old stuff doesn’t sound a whole lot different than every other band just like them from back then, though, so I guess I can’t be offended that you’d say so,” he teased. Giving her a facial shrug, Derek shook his head a little. “See, I think you could, if that was your thing or you wanted to. And I can’t tell if that’s humility or a genuine misunderstanding of your own self-worth.” He paused. “And I don’t mean just, you know, to look at. You are very nice to look at, but that’s not just what I mean,” he clarified. Derek didn’t know Caitlin very well yet, but the fact that he even had the inclination to get there eventually was telling; it wasn’t something he typically bothered to do with people anymore, but there was a draw there, for him. Caitlin was kind. His gut told him that she was trustworthy and, so far, she’d only managed to prove him right. She helped people and she was understanding and sympathetic. Caitlin was smart and she worked her ass off when she wanted to achieve something. But she wasn’t a killer, he thought. So what he had gathered from her was that he thought she shined just as beautiful on the inside as she was pretty to look at. Most of all, whether he realized it or not, Caitlin gave off a vibe that said she didn’t necessarily need protecting but she’d take it where she could get it and nowadays, Derek would rather a woman who wanted to be protected over a woman who could handle it herself. Those women scared him, now, more than he was willing to admit. Clearing his throat, Derek reached for his mug and took another drink, draining it of the leftover tea. “Now you try.” “How trendy of you.” she teased, still actually unable to remember any of their songs. But he had a point, they probably sounded like many others. She could be thinking their music belonged to an entirely different band. “Don’t tell me you wore eyeliner to go with the theme?” She thought she had pretty good self worth, but she couldn’t see how she’d ever be comparable to a runway model. “You might want to let me examine your head tomorrow. I’m a little concerned.” she said with a smile, though mostly just teasing. She didn’t have a clue what he meant, but she kind of got the impression he was just going to leave it there and let her make of it what she could. She’d probably over analyze it in every way possible and still not be sure of her own conclusion. Now it was her turn to sit back and consider. She wasn’t good at this game. She could tell someone all about their health after an examination, in details they’d probably not understand. “I think you haven’t forgiven yourself for something that’s happened to you. I don’t know what that is, but based on the way you talk about yourself, and the person you seem to be, I’m inclined to believe you’ve done some serious growing as a person, but don’t actually see just how much.” She thought about her own answer for a second, and then sighed. “Or I could just suck at reading about without charts and facts.” With a huffed laugh, Derek shook his head. "No, definitely not. I was into the music, not the scene," he corrected. He grinned a little at her joke and decided that maybe it had just been a while since someone had let her know that they thought she was something pretty special. He supposed, too, that she was missing the bits that were still floating around in his mind unspoken, so he didn't push, because that would mean having to share. He had to give it to her, she was either especially perceptive or especially intuitive. Maybe she was both. Derek's chin lifted a little in half a nod before relaxing and the weak smile that tugged on his lips fell a little short of his eyes. "Some things don't really deserve forgiveness," he said. "But I'm trying to grow, anyway. I'd like to think I'm getting somewhere. You're good at this," he replied solemnly. In an effort to move away from the guilt that had settled over his bones years ago with no signs of letting up, Derek nodding down at their dirtied dishes. "Do you want help with these? I'd feel kind of bad making you do the cooking and the clean up." She shook her head, trying not to let the conversation get too depressing once again. “Not really. It was a lucky guess. Probably helped by the fact that I’ve been there myself.” It took a while to accept mistakes and move on. But she was managing, even if every now and then the guilt came back. Caitlin stood up from the table, looking over to the sink. “I’ll wash if you dry?” she suggested, “There’s not a whole lot, so we should be able to get through them pretty quickly.” She had no idea if he planned on leaving shortly after dinner, but if he did, at least this was an excuse to keep him around just a bit longer. “I suppose everybody has been at some time or another,” Derek replied, getting to his feet. He didn’t, however, suppose that everyone who had been there also had innocent blood on their hands for their trouble. Better not to discuss that, anyway, he thought. Derek smiled, picking up his own dirty dishes. “That sounds like a good plan,” he agreed easily enough. He didn’t want to leave her in the lurch with the mess, but he thought he ought to get back to Cora sooner than later before she decided that she wanted to come looking for him in the gym only to find that he wasn’t there. ...he might not have mentioned to her that he was having dinner afterward and she’d been out when he’d gotten home to take a shower. It was better that he got home first so that she didn’t assume something awful, because she was a Hale and Hales always seemed to jump to the worst possible scenario conclusion first rather than last. It took no time at all to clear off the table, put the leftovers into a container and shove it into the fridge. Lunch tomorrow was set. Soon she was passing over just cleaned dishes. Somehow having two sets of hands always made the cleaning up suck less. “As much as I hate dishes, this beats the hell out of trying to crack the virus for one night. At least I now officially have a source that might just be able to engineer a cure from. I will sleep so much better once I figure that out.” Once she handed over the last dish, she washed off her own hands, and reached for a second drying towel. “And thank you for the cleaning assist.” Derek dutifully dried the dishes as she handed them over to him, and once they’d finished, he started to offer her the towel before realizing that she’d washed her hands already. “Where do you want this?” he asked, instead. “And yeah,” he added as he handed over the last dry dish for her to put away. “I don’t blame you. It’s really cool that you’re able to do that with just...you know, blood samples. I can’t even wrap my head around that.” “Over the oven handle is fine.” hooking it on the handle would let it dry, and keep it in reach. “Yeah, well I can’t wrap my head around fighting off the infected. So there you go. I’ll take my blood samples anyday. They make more sense.” She leaned up against the counter by the sink, smiling up at him. “I’m going to guess you need to be getting back to your sister?” “Fair enough,” Derek agreed with a chuckle. He’d never be able to understand the science and she’d never be able to understand the battle, maybe, but maybe that was okay. Maybe it was time to share his time with someone who wasn’t running into the fray at every turn. ...or creating the fray to run into, for that matter. He gave a sad sort of smile and a nod when Caitlin asked whether he needed to be getting back. “Yeah, I should get going before she goes down to the gym looking for me. I didn’t tell her I was coming here...I figured that was our business, not hers,” he admitted with a sheepish look. “...how’d I do for my first date? Not awful, I hope?” “You didn’t tell your sister you were meeting a girl and now you need to get back before you’re busted. Now that feels like something I should have experienced in high school. Nicely done.” she said with a laugh. “No, you did good. First dates are typically stressful. You didn’t seem too stressed, which is good.” Had they actually been in the real world, and out somewhere at a restaurant, she would have gone for a glass of wine to calm her own nerves. “But if your sister does catch you, I’m not taking any of the blame, just so you know.” To that, Derek nodded and laughed. “Touche,” he replied. “Well, there’s one non-existent thing off your bucket list. You’re welcome,” he joked. “I promise I’ll take the fall,” Derek laughed. His laughter faded a moment later. “So I, uh...should get going...but I’ll see you tomorrow, right? For class?” he asked. “And we should do this again sometime.” “Yeah, I’ll be there. No plans on missing class.” she confirmed with a nod, before pushing away from the counter. “And yeah, we should. Maybe the next supply run will bring in something really good.” Fingers crossed they could get something really tasty for the whole camp. “I’ll walk you out.” she added, looking toward the front door. That had all gone by quickly, but dinner could really only last for so long. “Fingers crossed,” he said as he started to move toward the door once she’d pushed off the counter. He turned to face her at the door and hesitated before deciding against trying to kiss her because as much as he wanted to get to know her better and spend more time with her, doing that would’ve pushed the idea that he wanted to do that a lot faster than he felt like he was ready to do just yet and the last thing he needed to do was throw out mixed signals to her and screw this up before it even had a chance to get off the ground. The wound from Braeden bailing was still healing. “Thanks for dinner, I had fun.” He smiled. “Have a good night, Caitlin.” Caitlin didn’t know if she was hoping for a goodnight kiss or not. This place was confusing. She’d just started to open up again from seeing Jay, and god only knew how long they were going to be here for. Maybe this was a stupid idea. Or maybe it was a good idea that was also another way to survive. But she wasn’t disappointed, she was still questioning things herself. “Good night, Derek. See you tomorrow.” |