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Duke (ducere) wrote in flippedrpg,
@ 2013-04-10 22:28:00

Entry tags:

ch: can: amie mccormack, ch: heir: kirley duke, p: lisa, p: lisa ii

Who: Duke & Amie
What: Duke's trying to get her to come back
When: Wednesday evening/night
Where: Field/forest in Neverland
Warnings/Status: Amie's on drugs, Duke's drunk, harsh words. / in progress.

Priorities. Kirley Duke had never had them. Not until he discovered fame and music, playing the guitar, his Sisters, drugs. They were priorities to him, technically speaking, but they weren't the usual ones. And when they finally flipped from the last adventure, where he was stuck on some island looking for treasure, - when he finally had the chance to see Amie in person, he went for a birthday party instead. It was the piss that his birthday, which should have been a rockstar extravaganza, was blown off in some pirate port.

The days hadn't been wasted, though, only they were spent being wasted. Rum, rum, and more rum. Amie went back to being quiet. She'd gone silent during his drunken splurge; in fact, she hadn't said a thing (that he saw) since the last time they spoke. It was easier to forget when he was celebrating, even if the celebrations were mostly spent imagining, through a haze, what a real good birthday party was or used to be at home. Or what it might have even been, given better circumstances.

At some point he sobered up enough to wonder where the people he knew were - not the dirty pirates he'd apparently befriended in the meantime. His mind came to Amie and he pictured her with stones. Lost at sea. Washed up on shore. Never to be found.

He was walking. The sand wasn't as resistant with the new round of rum in him, a quarter-finished bottle in hand, not the first drink of the night, but a good present to take. By the time Duke found her, after looking through random wigwams (that he called tents) and asking the mermaids, he'd mostly forgotten why he was walking around in the first place. And the rum was substantially lower.

"Amie…" He came into view slowly. He was scared she might run, relieved that he found her, nervous because her face said she was as lost as her words. Duke wasn't a father and he didn't know how the fuck to be one but he figured the choice wasn't much of one anymore. Not unless he wanted to prove that he was a selfish failure that allowed her to disappear, in any manner. It was more than that, of course. He cared for her like he didn't care for his friends, or lovers, but she was kind of his friend in some ways. It was complicated, honestly. And she wasn't his but he considered her to be - a daughter that only called him Duke.

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willnotbeled
2013-04-11 04:25 am UTC (link)

He reeked of liquor but it wasn't anything Amie hadn't been used to by now. "The normal Native stash. Not as good but.." Amie shrugged. She had packed an abundance in her bag to take back to the compound. She was still figuring out how to get her hands on some pills but she would have to rely on what little patience she had left when they flipped to a respectable world that offered what she wanted. Amie moved her head away from his hand.

"Why in the fuck would you care?"

It was something she had been battling. Why would anyone care about someone they didn't know or who had never met? What the hell was the point of this place if it wasn't to care for one another? Most were out for themselves or their family. So why would Duke care? Amie was not his daughter.

A very blunt side was about to come out of Amie and she physically bit her tongue to keep words from spilling out of her mouth. Amie missed her father. It was that simple. If there was anyone in her life that she was close to, it was him. She had her secrets but here, with a man who looked like Kirley, was not Kirley. Not hers. He was a rockstar yet not ready for fatherhood and Amie could not fault him for that, nor would she hold him responsible for her selfish actions and dark thoughts.

"I'm sure you have better things to do and people to fuck than stand here playing pretend father."

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ducere
2013-04-11 04:45 am UTC (link)

There was a nod at that. He learned quickly how to stock up in the worlds where you could for the worlds where you couldn't. It didn't help if they left everything behind at the compound…or you ended up in jail, stuck on a ship at sea, whatever. His arm dropped when she moved away, leaving him a bottle from being empty-handed. Sounded about right.

Duke's lip caught between his teeth for an extra second before it came out: "Fuck you."

When the rum was gone, he took hold of her arms and forced her closer. He was only holding her in front of him, not too hard, but not gentle enough for her to pull away easily. She needed to look him or maybe he needed to look at her, he wasn't sure, he just wanted to be clear even while they were both on some fuzzy edge of not-sober.

"Why the hell would I even be here if I didn't give a fuck? Or have tried at all?" He wanted to shout about how she never treated him like a father, which was on her, but how he cared about her in some capacity. But it dawned on him that while it would get his point across and the way he felt, maybe it wasn't what she needed.

"I'm not playing pretend because I am your dad," he gave her a slight shake on the emphasis. "I'm not going to let you go off the deep end, continue to treat me like shit, and not give a fuck about anything or anyone. Because that's fucking bullshit, Amie. I'm here."

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willnotbeled
2013-04-11 09:49 pm UTC (link)

Amie smiled. Fuck you. It didn't hurt. If anything, it helped in its own way. In just two simple small words, it had been made clear that she had some sort of effect on him. When he placed his hands upon her arms, Amie frowned. She wasn't in the mood. She hadn't been in the mood for any sort of bonding.

"You're here because you're drunk and you lost your way." Before Amie could say something else to inflict some sort of pain, she was shut up by his own words. She couldn't tell if she was angry, upset, or just plain exhausted. Her emotions were on their own depressing rollercoaster and here was this bloke, an image of her father saying that he was her father and he was there. Amie stood still for a moment, showing no emotion. She was feeling a lot on the inside but over the years of having secrets, Amie had gotten really good at hiding everything.

"You're here? Mm." Amie curled her lips inwards to refrain from saying anything else just yet. She collected her thoughts slowly, her eyes looking over his face, picking out each feature that she might have gotten from him. "Funny how you start acting like a father now. Concern of a father would have started right off the bat when I told you I was high." She leaned a little more. "My own father back home doesn't know half the shit you do and yet it didn't discourage you. I am stuck in a place where not even a handful of people could give two shits about me. Not even the bloody scientists could answer my questions, or more rather, they really just don't care."

Amie leaned back. "And here you are, pretending to care. Why? Because you're bored, because you've ran out of people to fuck and booze to drink. Christ...you'd go as low as to fuck a girl so you don't have to feel alone." She was having flashbacks of a very similar argument she had back home. "I can be alone, I just wish you were around more often. I would, for once, to not have you hit on one of the few mates I have. I want you to grow the fuck up because I'm not ready to just yet."

Amie became quiet, knowing most of what she had said would have hurt, but it was the truth. "Its easier to not care because you can't depend on anyone else. The second I'll start depending on anyone, the sooner I can be disappointed, the sooner it hurts." She was beginning to feel sick, the field around them began spinning again. Closing her eyes slowly, she opened them in the same fashion, focusing on Duke's same blue eyes. "I've fucked up bad and I'm sorry that I've hurt you. I'm fucked up."

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ducere
2013-04-11 10:46 pm UTC (link)

Everything went quiet as Amie silently figured out her response. In those moments, Duke felt a calm come over him, expecting their conversation to end in some happy family moment. He was kidding himself, of course. Duke didn't get the nice, fun times and he knew that - he knew it because Amie and her dad had told him how shitty things were before. But that was negative enough for him to contently not think about again. Life was different now, wasn't it? At least for her at home.

And as they stood there he had a flash of his own daughter, the one he saw in the pensieve. She had dark hair like him, like Amie. She was much younger but he wondered if they would look the same or end up similar in any fashion. When she finally started talking again…it was like the world he held up with such strong hope just came crumbling down. He could feel it falling, pressing in on him, hurting worse with each sentence tacked on that told him how much he hadn't been there or how much he'd been fucking up.

It was obvious when she hurt him more; Duke's face cringed when she attacked him and how he acted, telling him he needed to grow up. So you don't have to feel alone. That statement was more honest than anything he could come up with on his own. Nothing really made any of it any easier to handle. He didn't want to grow up that way. He was a fucking star who could get just about anything he wanted and why should that change? What did it even mean to grow up?

In the end he let go so he could wrap his arms around her as he stepped closer. "You're not fucked up," he assured quietly. When his own eyes closed, it sent the field into motion - all crazy, the way he felt. "Not any worse than me. I'm sorry. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, not with you, or maybe ever. I don't know what to do but I will always be here for you…" That was one promise he could keep.

"I'll do what I can to make it better, I just - I can't promise I'm not going to fuck up more or do it all perfect, y'know? But I wanna help. Because I care even with all that other shit, I do care." At some point he figured she understood that because she went as far as to apologize for hurting him. If she didn't care, or thought he didn't, then there wouldn't have been a need for it.

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willnotbeled
2013-04-13 06:13 pm UTC (link)

Definitely. Things were indeed shitty in Amie's past that had its long standing effects on the young woman. She was closer to her father now than she ever was before and it helped that they had a common bond to understand one another. Amie still had her reservations. She could only see herself around family and no one else. She had no fears about being alone for the rest of her life and in most cases, she preferred it that way. Friends would always come and always go and really the only person she could ever count on at most was her father, who wasn't here.

Instead, a version of her father was here who hadn't experienced of bringing a little girl into the world. He hadn't abandoned his daughter to live the rockstar life. He hadn't taught Amie to play piano. Duke hadn't experienced everything she had gone through and continued to go through in order to get the relationship she had with her dad.

It was like starting from scratch but this time, Amie wasn't nice about it. She was honest and if she knew anything, honesty hurt.

When he wrapped his arms around Amie, she closed her eyes and held onto him. He wasn't the same as her father, but there was an odd sort of comfort in the way it felt normal to be held like this by him. "We're equally fucked up of which I've reduced to genetics and other substances." That was all he really needed to say, that he would be there. If she had to rely on someone, she would rather it be her father or some version of him.

"I know..." She spoke quietly and leaned back slightly to put some space between the both of them. She was high, he was drunk which made for a very fatherly daughter moment. "And just because I sound like a bitch, doesn't mean I'm doing it out of spite."

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