InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I'm weird, I'm a weirdo."

remus lupin is not a pawn (atamewerewolf) wrote in flippedrpg,
@ 2012-08-19 12:43:00

Entry tags:

ch: knap: remus lupin, ch: knap: sirius black, p: emmy, p: veetee

Who: Sirius and Remus^knap
What: Discussing teenage emotions
When: Yesterday
Where: A treehouse
Warnings: Nah

It was difficult to wrap his mind around everything that the pamphlet said, and even harder to try to figure out which world was his properly. There was so little information in the pamphlet that could identify it. All of the pamphlets seemed to be identifying on core points in a life he didn't know and people he didn't know. It made figuring out which of the Marauders were his proper difficult and he wondered how James had come to an understanding that he wasn't his Remus. Perhaps because that James was from the world with factions? He knew he didn't have those. No, he had Hogwarts and lessons with Albus. But there was no mention of any of that.

Discussion had brought him to figuring out which Sirius was his at least. He had quietly mentioned missing out on one of his private lectures, with a solemn face, and the Sirius he was now sitting with had seemed to at least understand that. He wondered if that was something the other worlds had. Did he get these types of special lessons outside of the classroom elsewhere? It wasn't always with Albus, in fact rarely was it, which was why he was sort of disappointed that he had missed one by coming here. Still, it wasn't so bad, though it was highly confusing.

One of the Sirius' seemed far more outgoing then Remus was ever used to. There was no secret that Remus hated his own apperance. The scars and gashes that lined his body from youth were not something he found attractive; nor were they something he wished for people to see. And then...he knew precisely what Sirius was implying. And though he had many, many fantasies of situations where he was being caressed by the man...fantasies he didn't dare speak outloud...he got the impression that it would have been just another shag to that Sirius. A Sirius whom was not his own. He knew that immediately from the manner of his words.

He wanted more then that. He wanted it to mean something.

Maybe that was silly.

He was sitting now in one of the treehouses, having stolen a plate heaping with slices of pizza, with his back against the walls. His leg was dangling down the entrance and he was staring out ahead, listening to the sound of laughter in the distance.

He didnt' think that he'd ever been accused of being the honorable one out of the four of them. Petey was cautious and Remus was obviously responsible. James had his own code of morals that he adhered to, which let him retain some sense of honor. But he was Sirius Black. He was the reckless one. The one that didn't gave a damn, readily labeled hooligan and rebel. The one who had been called a slag by girls. And yet, something irked about him the way another Sirius was speaking to Moony. You just couldn't proposition a Moony like that -- it wasn't them. Moony couldn't be some experiment, some one night stand. He was their Moony.

He couldn't even precisely say why it irked him. But it did. He was pissed about it, the more he thought about it.

He also had no idea what world he came from. Perhaps it should have concerned him more, but it didn't. It did mean that there was the potential that a lot of horrific futures were waiting for him (he didn't seem to get a lot of happy endings in the pamphlets) but he had pushed that to the side for the time being.

At the moment, he was merely enjoying being with what he was pretty sure was his Moony. The moment he'd seen him, he'd sort of just thought that it was his Moony, which was maybe silly, because maybe all the Moonies looked exactly the same.

He grinned as he reached over and stole a slice of pizza before leaning back in the treehouse again.

"You look like you're thinking serious thoughts," Sirius teased wryly with a grin, nudging Remus' hip with the heel of his foot.

He gave a light huff that could have posed for a hint of laughter or just an acknowledgement of the statement, but he meant it to be a sense of amusement. Or an attempt. He was having Sirius thoughts, though he wasn't going to mention that allowed. Once the huff had been released, his shoulders shrugged, and he turned his head to glance back to his friend.

"Does jealousy of not having this good of pizza back at school count as a serious thought?" He asked, which of course was not at all the problem, but it made him smile as he leaned forward and grabbed another slice.

"I don't know, Pads, I'm just...wrapping my mind around all of this, you know? It isn't every week you get to see yourself talking to three other versions of yet again yourself."

"Pizza is always a serious thought, Moony," Sirius answered, managing to keep his voice entirely flat as he answered. As soon as he was finished though, he couldn't help but break out into another grin. Because while he might have spent his hours lamenting over the pizza that was served at Hogwarts, he didn't believe for a second that Remus would be doing the same.

"Try five of yourself," Sirius teased when Remus mentioned three. He'd seen a few of the others Moonies -- although he hadn't met any in person yet. He was a bit curious about them, as curious as he was about the other Jameses and Siriusi. There was only one Peter as far as he could tell. (And he couldn't help but wonder what the hell Peter would look like as a woman. Strange, he betted.) But he made a great woman, and he would have loved the opportunity to get to meet other versions of Remus.

"It's not so bad though, is it?" Sirius asked as he took a bite of pizza.

"Is it now?" He asked with a raised eyebrow, though the answer wasn't important to him. He believed it was true and it was not really a debate. Hogwarts needed pizza more often, certainly, and more to this caliber.

"I think there is at least five of me. But the room I'm in has two, at the very least," he mused out loud before shifting to press his back further up against the wall.

Another shrug was given. "No. It's...odd, but not bad, well..." he cut off after the well. He didn't know where to lead the sentence and it was likely going into territory he didn't know how to express.

"I just don't know," he decided to finish with, though it didn't sound entirely true.

"Of course," Sirius answered, continuing to grin. "When is pizza not a serious issue?" SIrius asked cheekily. He knew that no Moony would probably ever see the food that was served at Hogwarts as a serious business -- but he rather suspected that it would be a good way of distracting Remus from whatever was really bothering him at the moment.

"Does it bother you?" Sirius asked, figuring he might as well cut to the heart of the subject. It seemed as if Remus was dancing around it. There was clearly something about multiple thems that was leaving him ill at ease. Sirius didn't exactly know how else to go about asking Remus what was wrong; Remus was good at being subtle. Sirius never was.

"Not being able to read some of them the way I can read you, Prongsy, and Petey bothers me," he admitted as he picked at a lose thread on his sleeve. He yanked at it, his eyes focused down, until it tugged free and he let it fall to the ground.

"You think that other Sirius was having a laugh at me?" He finally asked, quietly, because it seemed as though it were a delicate subject for him. "Or...well, he seemed serious. It didn't seem like a joke," he clarified, his eyes still averted, his frown etching in fully.

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_rebelrebel
2012-08-19 05:20 pm UTC (link)

"Well they're not your Petey or Prongsy or Pads," Sirius said with a shrug of his shoulders. He hadn't thought about it that way before, but he supposed it was true anyway. If there were minute differences that happened in their lives, why should they be able to read each other as well as the ones that were from this world? It wasn't as if they liked the versions from the other worlds equally. Sirius would have been content to marry Sirilla, but wanted to hit the Sirius who had propositioned Moony.

Sirius scowled when Remus brought up that particular Sirius, and didn't take any care to school his reaction.

"He shouldn't have spoken to you that way, serious or not," Sirius responded, his tone surly. Especially if he had been serious though, Sirius thought.

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atamewerewolf
2012-08-19 05:27 pm UTC (link)

"No, they aren't. You are," he said with a light smile towards him. He let his gaze remain on him for a moment before it dropped back down to his lap and he sucked in a deep breath. "I wish James was proper and right...and that our Pete was here. It feels like we've been severed away," he mentioned lightly, but in truth, he did enjoy the slight moment of quiet of just him and Sirius.

He let his gaze shift to the side when Sirius said that. "It looked bad in every way. Anyone could read it..." he trailed off. Anyone could take from it what they like. They could infer that Remus wanted it, which he did but not from that Sirius, or thousand other things.

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_rebelrebel
2012-08-19 11:10 pm UTC (link)

"And think that Siriusi are slags who can't keep it in their pants?" Sirius said with a light laugh, hoping that Remus wouldn't let his thoughts get too dark -- after all, he was fairly certain that no one was going to too harshly judge a Remus based on the actions of a Sirius.

"Well, that might be true," Sirius said shrugging shoulder idly. "You want me to go hit him in the mouth?" Sirius asked intently. "For possibly sullying your good reputation, Moony?" He wouldn't mind the excuse. There was no need for Remus to be worrying over something like this.

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atamewerewolf
2012-08-19 11:39 pm UTC (link)

"You aren't worried they are going to think that of you, are you?" He instead replied, though it dawned on him once the words were out that perhaps it was meant to lighten up his inner conflict. He then smiled, simply because he had misunderstood and now had caught up, before smirking to accompany the smile. "It might be," he told him with a return laugh.

"That's up to you. It won't change much," he commented, "the reputation would have been already sullied and an action wouldn't do any good," he further explained. Leaning back on the palms of his hands.

"It took me off guard." He finally admitted. It wasn't as if that was too dangerous to say.

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_rebelrebel
2012-08-19 11:45 pm UTC (link)

"If that's the worst anyone ever thinks of me, I'll be in good shape, Moony my crumpet," Sirius teased. He didn't really care. It wasn't as if he went around sleeping with just anyone, but he was pretty comfortable when it came to sexual things, and he had no problem with finding ways to enjoy himself -- he just -- he just thought that it was important that his partner was enjoying his or herself too. Felt respected and whatnot. Maybe that was why what the other Sirius had said got under his skin.

"He shouldn't have said it to you at all," Sirius said, and he was openly scowling now, unable to even crack a joke about sullied reputations. "Moonies shouldn't be... seduced. They should be... wooed." He didn't know exactly if that was what he meant to say, but it was true enough, he figured. If anyone was going to court Remus, they would have to do a hell of a better job than just asking him to sleep with them over the journals.

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atamewerewolf
2012-08-20 12:06 am UTC (link)

"Crumpet?" He then repeated with a near howl of a laugh, his face lighting up almost instantly. He remained giggling, unable to push away his own smile. Finally, he pressed the back of his hand against his mouth to stiffle the laughter, his eyes flashing to him. He needed a good laugh. "Are you going to butter me up?"

Then he sucked in a breath, biting down on his lip for a moment. "I haven't been seduced...you know. Ever. I don't really want to call that a golden attempt at it..." He then paused for a moment. "Haven't been wooed, either," he added, with the defense mechanism of the shrugged shoulder.

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_rebelrebel
2012-08-20 12:16 am UTC (link)

"Don't I always butter you up, Moony?" Sirius asked with a wry grin, trying to use what he thought was his very best coy voice. It was obviously over the top. He scooted back across the small expanse of the treehouse, so he was actually sitting next to Remus now. He let his feet dangle over the edge as well.

"Oh, I suspect you'd be quite easy to woo," Sirius teased, refraining from pointing out that almost anything would have been better than the other Sirius' attempt at seducing Remus. "I suspect it would take a lot of chocolate." Sirius teased. "I'd buy you the good kind," Sirius pointed out, already caught up in the details of his brilliant plot. "Probably lots of dark chocolate. Maybe some with chocolate-covered cherries or strawberries. And some of that chocolate wine, of course."

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atamewerewolf
2012-08-20 12:32 am UTC (link)

He bit further down on his lip but this time because of the faint blush he felt rising to his cheeks. He quietly hoped it was only the feeling of heat against his skin and not any shift in color that would give away the blush. "Yes, but usually when you want homework done."

"Ha," he scuffed, but only because he didn't know what to think on the idea. It hadn't ever happened before. He shifted his gaze to look directly at Sirius, more than hyper aware of how close he was now that he had shifted across the small tree house, before raising his eyebrows.

"You just described a slice of heaven," he responed after a pause, his smile lingering, as he found himself caught up in a fantasy of what that would be like. The chocolate would be nice but he was imaging all of it done by Sirius and that was, of course, what made it wonderful.

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_rebelrebel
2012-08-20 02:35 am UTC (link)

"You wound me, Moony," Sirius answered playfully, pressing a hand against his chest as if Remus had actually wounded him in some manner. "And besides," he commented, swinging his feet back and forth. "I don't have any homework for you to do right now."

"See," Sirius said, grinning, as he turned to look at Remus, meeting his gaze. "I would know how to woo a Moony."

The funny thing was, the moment he said it, he realized that he would know how to woo Moony. Probably any Moony, that was true. But this was his Moony. He would know how to woo his Moony. And maybe that was really why he disliked the idea of another Sirius talking to Remus like that. Because if he was going to be with any Sirius --

It should be him.

He leaned in before he had even really processed any of his thoughts, and let his lips brush gently over Remus'. He had always been brash, and too prone to acting without thinking. And even as his lips connected with Remus', some part of him was panicking, because he was afraid that he was going to upset Remus.

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atamewerewolf
2012-08-20 03:15 am UTC (link)

"You would treat me so well," he commented, his gaze refusing to pull away. As he looked at him, all he could think about was how very true the statement was. It was something he had believed in for awhile, one of the thoughts that had developed thanks to his fantasies, but one that he was fairly certain would never come to pass. It was a crush and it was on Sirius Black.

It wasn't something that was ever going to be fulfilled.

Except, as he continued to gaze forward at Sirius, he felt a stirring inside of him, as though he were anticipating something. His nerves seemed even more wound up then they had before and before he knew it, Sirius was leaning in, and his lips were against his own.

For a few fleeting seconds, his eyes remained open, and a thousand question sprung forward. But quick enough, he pushed them to the side, and instead leaned inwards, because he liked the way Sirius' lips felt against his own and the feeling of butterflies in the pit of his stomach.

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_rebelrebel
2012-08-20 04:33 am UTC (link)

"Course I would, Moony," Sirius breathed out against Remus' mouth, unable to keep himself from smiling when he felt Remus kiss him in return. As soon as he felt he had permission, Sirius pushed in closer. He kissed Remus a little more deeply, his lips making firm contact against Remus'. His leg bumped up against Remus', and he couldn't help but run one of his hands along the side of Remus' neck, his fingers tracing over the slight ridge of a scar, his fingertips brushing against the hair at the nape of Remus' neck.

His skin suddenly felt too tight, but everything felt too good for him to even consider stopping. It felt right, and that was the truth of it. He hadn't ever really thought about kissing Moony before -- not before the other Sirius had brought it up, and it was scary in a way. Because he was Moony, and he still stood by the principle that he was not there for a mere seduction, and that he was so much more. Because he was a Marauder and one of his best mates -- but that was maybe what made everything better about this kiss too. It had to mean something.

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