WHO: Sam White Horn and Jordan Thomas WHEN: Wednesday 10/19 WHERE: Woodsbridge Faire Haunted House SUMMARY:CHALLENGE: ALL DIALOGUE Jordan and Sam take on the haunted house. WARNINGS: Mentions of blood STATUS: Complete!
“Jordan. Jordan, I don’t know if I like this.”
“Okay, but like, NOT EVERY ROOM can be like the room with the soul sucking dolls, right? Because that’s just… EVIL.”
“I really hope not - OH SHIT, what the fuck is that - thank God, it’s only a curtain. Jesus, I thought I was gonna have a heart attack. For the third time in twenty minutes. Why did we decide to go through the haunted house, again? Because if it was your idea, I’m sending you my medical bill.”
“I’m pretty sure it was YOUR idea, actually, and okay, not to be like, an alarmist or anything, but has that skeleton been following us? Because I SWEAR we left him behind, like, two rooms ago.”
“MY idea? You better not have just said a skeleton is following us, Jordan, or I will murder you and no one will ever know the difference. Or maybe the skeleton will murder us both because you CURSED us, somehow.”
“................................You don’t think that the skeleton could ACTUALLY kill us, right? Because I am so not okay with dying? Especially not while I’m still a----AHHHHHHHHH. WHY WOULD SOMEONE ACTUALLY PUT CHUCKY IN HERE?”
“DUDE I DON’T KNOW. More like, why does Chucky exist at all? What kind of hell is this place???”
“There is no way this is okay, right? Like, this is unconstitutional? CRUEL AND UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT?”
“This is definitely not okay. WE HAVE RIGHTS AGAINST THIS. IT’S CALLED THE EIGHTH AMENDMENT.”
“Sam. Sam. SAM. CHUCKY JUST SMEARED BLOOD ON MY LEG.”
“DID YOU SERIOUSLY JUST JUMP ON TOP OF ME? How do we get out of here? JORDAN HELP.”
“HE TOUCHED ME, SAM. He touched me and that’s NOT OKAY and I want to go HOME. How do we get OUT OF HERE?”
“’HOW DO WE GET OUT OF HERE?’ I JUST ASKED YOU THAT! Um. Maybe this way? I think...Also I hope that’s your hand but whatever we can worry about that later I just need to get the fuck away from that satanic doll collection.”
“This way. There’s a glowing thing and that has to be an exit sign, right?”
“I really fricking hope so. Shit, no it’s not, reverse, reverse, that is not an exit, it’s a - a bottle of rum? Literally what is happening right now - uh oh.”
“Sam. Are those furbies saying what I think they're saying?”
“Um. If they’re saying ‘red rum’ in really creepy unison then yes?”
“Okay. So this is how I die. Via furby in Fairy tale Town.”
“The hell we’re dying in a haunted house because of the world’s dumbest toy idea ever….do we fight this out or just run for it?”