Hey dumbass, I know you're new at this so I'll give you an easy one.
RIDDLE ME THIS: I've little strength, but mighty powers; I guard small hovels and great towers. But if perchance my master leaves, He must ensure he safeguards me. What am I?
[Pivate to Thierry B.] [Late, late at night when all the nice little crazies are asleep, a voice sounds through Thierry's cell on the PDA system. It's older, dry and a little familiar.]