Mistress? I'm so not a mistress, but I could totally be one if you really wanted. I didn't think you were the kinky type though. What's your favorite? A crop? Paddle? I think you'd probably pass on restraints and stuff, but man, now I kinda wanna spank you. That might be hot.
There are! Four, plus all the story/world building ones. Tolkein was a wordy SOB. They made the first three into movies, and can I just say that if you're anywhere near as hot as you were in the movie, damn I'll be your mistress any time you want ;). The fourth one, which is actually a prequel and it's all about Bilbo's journey for when he gets the ring, is coming out soon, in theaters. I heard if you go to the IMAX theater at midnight, you get to see the first 9 minutes of the new Star Trek movie and I'm soooooo mad I can't go :(